The format isn’t horrible, it’s a lot easier to read that some that I’ve seen, so don’t get too hung up on it. The font seems to have changed to Times New Roman, the spacing between lines is pretty tight, the borders on either side of the dialogue (especially on the right) are pretty miniscule, making the text run right across the page… It could be easier to read, but it’s not really bad. I’m sure you know about the page-per-minute rule, in its current format, it wouldn’t adhere to that rule.
I did notice that the file extension is .rtf, rather than .pdf. How did you export this from Celtx? There’s a button “Export PDF”, try that and it should look exactly as it does on screen. Or did you copy/paste it out to another program?
As far as “fuck” goes, if that’s the way you want the character to talk, there’s nothing wrong with that. I swear a fair bit, but never to the extent of your characters, so it just seems unrealistic to me. Off the top of my head, I remember reading “I’m fucking hungry.” I just don’t think a real person would say fuck in that sentence?
Is this the opening scene? If so, it feels like the opening scene of a TV show, rather than a feature. I really can’t put my finger on why, it just feels it…
