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archived-videos Swift - Trailer

I re-edited my entry to a 48hr film contest as a trailer. I'd like to hear what you think!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CrKFhVF3bt8


And here's the original.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eL2g4xF6t5M
 
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Missed this when you posted it. I guess the advice is too late now but i agree with the others. It seems much more interesting when presented as a story.

Anyhow, any updates on it?
 
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