Logline

Murdock

Murdock

What do you guys think about this logline??

Eden Falls is an action/thriller about a man of faith who, after being forced to kill his family to save them from a plague, seeks his own death in recklessly fighting the invasive disease. His plans for his own death change when he is confronted with the fact, the creator of the plague is not only alive, but has a cure and a family.
 
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Modern Day Myth Prod. LLC said:
A good technique to use is to create an outline of your story and build around it.
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You're right. That's what I'm in the middle of now. If you want you can check the blog I'm writing. Its mainly to keep me honest with my daily schedule. I put in a minimum 1 hour creative work. Once I feel myself getting tired I either rest or go back over I have already done then rest. Either way I try not to go much over an hour unless I'm feelin it. Seems to be working so far.
 
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What happened to ACT TWO and ACT THREE?

ACT ONE

Introduce your main character(s)

What does your lead want?

What stands in their way?

ACT TWO

The Conflict

What will prevent the main character from geting what they want?

Does the conflict change your character? How?

Is all hope lost? Has your lead character switched sides?

What has the conflict taught your main character that will change them from the beginning of the story?

ACT THREE

Thr Resolution.

What do we find after the smoke has cleared?

Did your hero survive? Did everyone die? Did your hero overcome their challenge? Did boy meet girl and fall in love?

What lies ahead for your hero?
 
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Even with a complex story the logline needs to be simple. Maybe
the problem is with your “accident/happenstance” angle. That is
not usually the best way for a character to move forward - and it
makes it difficult to sell. I don’t mean sell the script for money, I
mean sell the idea.

I love Adeimantus’ logline. I would read that script.
 
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I think more "cause and effect" should be in the next version with less "accidents."

Watch more movies for inspiration. Last Man On Earth, Resident Evil 1-4, The Omega Man, the original Night Of The Dead and Dawn Of The Dead, and The Evil Dead.
 
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directorik said:
Even with a complex story the logline needs to be simple. Maybe
the problem is with your “accident/happenstance” angle. That is
not usually the best way for a character to move forward - and it
makes it difficult to sell. I don’t mean sell the script for money, I
mean sell the idea.

I love Adeimantus’ logline. I would read that script.
Click to expand...

It is a nice logline isn't it.:)


I think you're absolutely right about the accident/happenstance thing. I've already changed it to where its more of a "conspiracy" angle. You know, things are happening beyond his control, type of thing.
 
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Murdock, I like the idea. Adeimantus’ logline tightened it up.

But what if you moved the killing of his own family to the climax, and *then* he found out about the man with the cure? Then we get to see the character build up to that decision, and the killing of his own family is devastating. It's a pretty dramatic scene to start the story with... Where do you go from there?

One of the reasons I like your idea is that (sadly) every now and then a man does just that to his family, and this is a chance for you to explore it...

Good luck!
 
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kjones said:
Murdock, I like the idea. Adeimantus’ logline tightened it up.

But what if you moved the killing of his own family to the climax, and *then* he found out about the man with the cure? Then we get to see the character build up to that decision, and the killing of his own family is devastating. It's a pretty dramatic scene to start the story with... Where do you go from there?

One of the reasons I like your idea is that (sadly) every now and then a man does just that to his family, and this is a chance for you to explore it...

Good luck!
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First, your idea is a good one. However I could almost write a whole new movie based on when he has to kill his family. Idea??:) The way I see it in my mind, I want to crush him at the very beginning and from that moment he has to grow again as a person and just as he's about to reach some form of normalcy, he gets crushed again.
 
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I must have missed the post where you dropped or answered where does the "man of faith" come in..

Just thought that a complementary term to faith is "sacrifice" so you could use the word "sacrifice" to describe what the "man of faith" did to his family.. if you need to go back to that..
 
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wheatgrinder said:
I must have missed the post where you dropped or answered where does the "man of faith" come in..

Just thought that a complementary term to faith is "sacrifice" so you could use the word "sacrifice" to describe what the "man of faith" did to his family.. if you need to go back to that..
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That is an excellent point about the sacrifice!! Here is my response to the faith thing:
The faith angle gives more meaning to act of killing. He's a man that has devoted himself to a certain way of life.

Accordingly, when he chooses to kill his wife and daughter, he is defying gods will. It makes what is already an

impossible decision, even more difficult. It also provides for an interesting transformation of the character

from "god fearing protector" to "godless destroyer". His name BTW I'm thinking, will be Micheal Abaddon. As for

family friendly. Not really. Whatever comes out in the writing comes out. What I am shooting for is to make the

zombie element, not secondary, but not "Holy shit we have to run from the zombies" every moment of the

movie. If you want check out my first blog post. It kind of explains my reasoning there.



Also, in the story line he and his wife are told they can't have children. So his daughter is like a gift from god. And he's forced to give it back. Which I guess he isn't defying god's will then but you get it. The important thing to the story is he is changed/transformed. This is the first of 3 changes he must face in the story.
__________________
 
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The murder, faith thing was also a theme in "The Rapture" which was a very awesome movie..

Your second theme is also in scripture, what Issac was an answer to Abraham prayers for child.. and we know what ALMOST happened to him.. so play up those big themes..
 
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wheatgrinder said:
The murder, faith thing was also a theme in "The Rapture" which was a very awesome movie..

Your second theme is also in scripture, what Issac was an answer to Abraham prayers for child.. and we know what ALMOST happened to him.. so play up those big themes..
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Quit giving away my reference source!!:) JK.....kinda:D But you are right good strories have been good stories for a while.
 
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nothin new under the sun bro..

No zombies in the Rapture, and it would be sacrilege to suggest that zombies are in the bible.. well.. I suppose the accounts of resurrection might qualify.. Lazarus, the ZOMBIE!
 
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