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A script of mine got proofread and here's what the reader said.

H

harmonica44

She said she liked the ending, and it ends the opposite of how most action movies do. She said one thing she noticed was that how in some of the action scenarios, the characters have to throw logic out the window, just so the action sequence can happen, the way you want. She said that that's okay, though, and that most thrillers are required to do that. Is that good? Other movies have done that though for sure, not that I blame them, depending.
 
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You do realize that the kiler was the cancer patient(if I remember right) and the whole thing was a revenge sort of thing right?? So he did uit that way because 1. to make the revenger meaner and 2. to have a movie that wasn't 20 minutes long.
 
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I get that his revenge wanted to be mean but he still could have done that, without needlessly separating all the pieces of equipment for no logical reason. But the fact that he needed to do it so the movie would be more than 20 minutes shows that their was not enough material to begin with. When you stretch a 20 minute plot, to two hours, there is no pay off to throwing logic out, if that makes sense.

SPOILER FROM OLDBOY -- DO NOT READ FURTHER

At least in a movie like Oldboy, the villain has to kidnap someone for 15 years cause he needs to have another character age a few years within that time, in order for his revenge to work. So in that story, there was a motive for the villain to drag it all out, with pay off, since they had enough material for a whole 2 hour plot.
 
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I think there is a such thing as remaining realistic whist defying logic. I mean, humans act illogical at times right? So that is realistic. Wait... what?? My brain hurts. ;)
 
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It's an emotional state of mind, but in Saw I felt it was all dragged out by separating all the pieces needlessly just cause they didn't have enough for two hours, rather than the killers own sense of what makes him tick and not. If he is really that illogical and messed up perhaps they should have explored his character more, and give him some depth, rather than just making him a pawn that shows up whenever needed for a surprise, and can do whatever you want with, since we don't know hardly anything about him.
 
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I'm going to make a comparison. I'm sure you are aware there are different types of porn. Broadly speaking there are hard and soft core porn. Softcore could be that stuff you watch on a lonely Friday night. You know, the one with a...plot...and costumes and scenes/sets. Its kind of a normal movie but with longer sex scenes. Then there is the harcore compilation. You know the one you watch right before you head out the door for work. Cause its quicker. They have names like Money Shots, Creampie Compilation. Stuff like that.

I say that, to say this: What it seems like you want to make is a "money shot" compilation. Instead of a nice softcore porn that has a story. You must have a story first. And part of a good story are surprising turns. You are saying you want to take out the surprising turns and go straight to the thrusting.

Doesn't sound like a good movie to me.
 
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- I actually thought of Saw as I wrote that. :P
Which I loved.. mostly because James Wan and Leigh Wannel (?) were given half a chance and they made it work.

Murdock - "Part of a good story are surprising turns" - like when the plumber is cleaning the housewife's pipes.. and then all of a sudden her sister walks in? (SURPRISE!!)

harmonica44 - I think the idea with saw was that the game was the point. With seven it was the one decision at the end. With Oldboy it was humiliation. I hate to psychoanalyze characters in what's essentially a popcorn flick - but I would say jigsaw wanted to watch Cary Elwes's character struggle with decisions affecting others and with an inability to save lives.. as he didn't with Jigsaw in the cancer bed.
 
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And to keep it on point - there's an example of sticking to the logic of the film world and ignoring real logic. Horror movies don't require the serial killer to be reasonable. In fact the psycho killer sub-genre almost depends on a lack of reason.

Action movies - guns don't run out of ammo. The bad guy isn't really dead at the end.. (actually - just watch Last Action Hero)

I haven't read you script - (which I'd actually love to - with all of the discussion in this and your other thread) - so I don't know what logic is being broken.. but erm.. yeah.
 
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Murdock said:
How did 7 develop the villian? Through his actions. I'm convinced, more and more, that you're just plain stupid. And I'm sorry to tell you, there is no cure.
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He was developed cause he did talk a lot about his reasons on screen. He gave more to go on. In Saw the villain hardly even spoke if I remember correct. I don't think that's a stupid answer.
 
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Aaron M said:
And to keep it on point - there's an example of sticking to the logic of the film world and ignoring real logic. Horror movies don't require the serial killer to be reasonable. In fact the psycho killer sub-genre almost depends on a lack of reason.

Action movies - guns don't run out of ammo. The bad guy isn't really dead at the end.. (actually - just watch Last Action Hero)

I haven't read you script - (which I'd actually love to - with all of the discussion in this and your other thread) - so I don't know what logic is being broken.. but erm.. yeah.
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Well I'll show my script to a few others and see what opinions are given. I am wondering what is breaking the rules and what not. Sure a serial killer can be illogical, but when you have crooked cops working together I am not sure.
 
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Murdock said:
I'm convinced, more and more, that you're just plain stupid. And I'm sorry to tell you, there is no cure.
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Really, Murdock? Was that response necessary?

"Please be civil" is a Forum rule -- as is true in any forum. And you weren't attacked before you lashed out.

Though I only started posting here recently, one of my favorite aspects of this forum is the willingness on the part of its members to patiently explain things to people who are learning. I'd like to keep it that way; I've been a forum mod myself for years, and appreciate a certain level of mutual respect. And though I'm not a mod here, I'm well aware that civil discourse tends to keep people coming back.

If somebody's comment annoys you, nobody's forcing you to participate.
 
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DirtyPicturesTV said:
Really, Murdock? Was that response necessary?

"Please be civil" is a Forum rule -- as is true in any forum. And you weren't attacked before you lashed out.

Though I only started posting here recently, one of my favorite aspects of this forum is the willingness on the part of its members to patiently explain things to people who are learning. I'd like to keep it that way; I've been a forum mod myself for years, and appreciate a certain level of mutual respect. And though I'm not a mod here, I'm well aware that civil discourse tends to keep people coming back.

If somebody's comment annoys you, nobody's forcing you to participate.
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Yes you're right. I am sorry. It was uncalled for. I vow to ignore all future posts on any thread started by harmonica.

Just as an exercise Dirty. You should go through all his/her posts and read the ignorant responses to decent answers to barely valid questions that he's asked. You might have some fun.??
 
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I guess a serial killer movie isn't the best comparison, since a serial killer is just one man acting illogically. If I've been ignorant on here before, I apologize and will try to watch out for it. Thanks for the responses. I will go with the advice given to me on this one.
 
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I do not, and will not; they won't and they don't; and that's all!
I shall keep my strength for myself; they can keep theirs as well.
Why should we beat our heads against the wall
Of each other? I shall sit and wait for the bell.
 
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