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    Indie of the Month May

script:(justified unofficially) (mafia vs cops)

mail :johnzxyx@yahoo.com
----------------------------------------------------
mark-cop-35
sebasti-maia labour-40
caprio-mafia kingpin kabeecha's son - 35
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


fade in
EXT . OPEN landscape of desert nature.

(open JEEP moving in enough speed .
jeep jerks and stops. engine stop
engine start and stop again.)

fade out
fade in

(mark in driver seat.
sebasti in back, side seat with his handcuffed to the bar of

jeep.sebasti left leg been shot and blood.
four big sized boxes kept in back of jeep)

[sebasti]
(mexican accent)
I tell you again! officer.
the jeep you have stolen from me has got tracker.
They will be here in few minutes.

(mark takes out the revolvor from his jerkin.
checks the number of bullet in chamber)
p.o.v(sebasti)
only one bullet left in chamber(bullet holder).
mark sets back the revolvor

[sebasti]
one bullet for my ass.
But, my boss got enough bullets to poke and load your whole

body.

(mark gets out of jeep
relaeses the hancuffs of sebasti.
sebasti gets out of jeep)


[sebasti]
(laugh)
I know you guys.

(mark handcuffs sebasti to jeep again)

[sebasti]
hey!
what are you doing?

(mark opens the pertol tank cap and aims at it)
[sebasti]
(pleasing)
no
no
don't do that.

(wicked smile)

were you expecting me to say that?

look at me.
my boss pays my family if I die for him.

[mark]
how much sure are you , that your boss will pay your family

after your death?

[sebasti]

don't talk about him like that!
he takes care of all his men.
he is the massiah for us.
he gave us job ,money everything.
we are ready to give him our life.

(they hear car coming )

[sebasti]
(cheering voice)
I knew it
i knew it.
My boss will never let us down.


p.o.v[mark]

(car appearing from dust on that open landscape of desert

nature.

It stops some 100 meters away from marks place.

A door opens and person get out of it .
comes and stand in front of the car.


[mark]
who is he?

[sebasti]
(over whelmigly)

that's caprio!
my boss's son!

you are finished.
he is terror.

No matter what you do ,
you can never keep me here.
he will be taking me with him!

[mark]
(lightly)
really?
I just wanna see how much your boss and his son love you!

[cario]
(italian accent)
(shouting)
Hey !
you!

[mark]
(steps forward)
(shouting)
ya !

i can hear you
caprio !!

[caprio]
(shouting)
I'll let you go,
if you get me my boxes back!

[mark]
(shouting)
what about sebati?

[caprio]
(shouting)
who??

[mark]
(shouting )
sebasti , the guy next to me.
your man!

[caprio]
(shouting)
ok,

ask him to get that jeep to me.

p.o.v-caprio

(IN the desert landscape , jeep to which sebasti handcuffed ,
mark walking towards sebasti)

fade out

fade in
(mark stand in front of sebasti)
[mark]
you know what will happen ,if i tell him
that you are an informer.

(sebasti looks concerned )

[mark]

of course ,
they will kill you
but, more than that , they will kill you in front of other guys

by torturing to scare others.

listen,
they will even trace your whole family and finish them.
to teach other workers , what will happen if they dare.
[sebasti]
(shock voice)
no, they won't.

[mark]
you know what they did some 2 and half years ago.
the guy who dared , he and his whole family memebers were taken

out by storming their house.

(sebasti becomes pathetic)
[sebasti]

(joining palms of cuffedhand)
please,
i beg you
don't do that to my family.
if you want , kill me.
don't do such thing.

[cario]
(loosing cool)
(shouting)
hey,
what the fuck are you guys doing there?

[mark]
(shouting)
whats the gaurantee, you gonna let me go after taking boxes?


[caprio]
(shrugged)
what?

(shouting )
i told you I'm gonna let you go ,
I wil let you go
got it.


[mark]
(shouting)

I'm gonna take the jeep and leave the boxes and your guy here.

but, gaurantee me,
you not gonna chase me .

[caprio]
(shouting)
ok, just drop all the boxes there.

[mark]
(shouting)
nope,
I'll keep one box with me,
I'll leave the jeep along with that box far from here and will

inform you about the place.
then collect that left one box and jeep.

[caprio]
(shouting)
what ?
why the fuck ?

[mark]
(shouting)
just can't trust you!

[caprio)
(shouting)
whatever
(open arms)
granted
my pleasure

[mark]
(shouting)
But, what do i get in return?

[caprio]
(shouting)
What do want?

[mark]
(shouting)
Ten percent ! of this

[caprio]
(frustrated)
(shouting)
ok,
done.

[mark]
(shouting)
I want it now.
Got cash ,
even cheque works for me !

[caprio]
(shouting)
whatever,
waite,
I got cash itself
p.o.v(mark)
(goes to car and gets suit case .gets some bundle out and keeps
money back there.
comes front, waving at him)

[caprio]
(shouting)
look you lucky ass ,i got cash.

[mark]
(shouting)
all right ,

i'll send this guy to you .
you send those bundles here.
but, if you act smart,
I'll blow up whole jeep along with boxes
one bullet to petrol tank !


[caprio]
(shouting)
hey
you carzy fellow!
I told you , i'll get you money .
send that crap guy here !

[mark]
(shouting)
ok
waite!

fade out
fade in
P.O.V(caprio)
(mark walks towards sebasti and sebasti gets completely covered

)
fade out

fade in
[mark]
Look sebasti.
What matters for your boss and boss son.
Box goes for first preference,
then me , because I can get him out in future dramas like this

if he get caught.

least preference doesn't come for you at all.
you are not in the picture at all
you are just labour class guy to him.
you don't matter at all.
(sebasti listning to mark)
[mark]

If i say , i need some credit as spoting drugtrafficking here

to report to higher officer.
you know what credit help i get from caprio?

(sebasti concerned)

[mark]
it's your dead body .
Your boss's son will be wanting me to be his close here after.
it's inevitable.
terming you betrayer is possible for me.
he will be trusting me than you.

[sebasti]
so, there is no escape for me and my family
save me !
i beg you.

[mark]
just one way.

[sebasti]
what?
[mark]
if you help take out caprio here.
I might help you!

[sebasti]
(thinks for a while)
but, how can you take him out from here with one bullet !

[mark]
(stopping him)
not me

it's you , who going to take him out !
[sebasti]
(scared)
no way, i can't take on him

[mark]
listen
listen
(keeping his in waist of sebasti and out shirt to cover it)
keep it,
go close as much as possible , and make sure to head !

know what?

if you achieve it,
i'll get you job far from here.
middle class family income permanent job.
permanent citizen ship of this land for your family staying

away.

[sebasti]
waite!
how do you know about my famiy?
[mark]
leave it !!
first save your ass!
great future I promise.


[caprio]
(shouting)

you want to make it or not.

[mark]
(shouting)
just a sec,
fucking handcuff key is not working.
[mark]
(turns towards sebasti)
shoot him being close.
in head.


(sebasti released.
moves towards caprio.
p.o.v-caprio
(sebati dragging his wounded left leg)

[caprio]
(shouting)

make it fast
assole

quick

(sebasti tries his best to walk fast.
reaches caprio.
caprio slaps sebasti.
sebasti falls down.

)

[caprio]
get up
you! son of a bitch!!
get up !


(marks tries to get up and does get up.

caprio kicks in abs of sebasti.
sebasti falls back.


p.o.v(mark)
(caprio yelling and getting on fallen sebasti and punching him)

fade out

fade in

(caprio punching sebasti in face)
[caprio]
(in anger)

how dare you mother fucker
loose my goods.
you filty creature.

i'll kill you!

(takes out the gun from his coat.
points at his forehead)

p.o.v(mark)

(looking gun pointed towards sebasti)

[mark]

(shouting)
hey !

hey!!

(caprio looks at mark)
[mark]
(shouting)
hey
better be sending my money
mind your business later.
send money with him.
keep him alive , atleast untill i get the cash bundle.

[caprio]
ya
(spits on sebasti bloody face)
crap
(goes near car to get bundles kept on car front.

sebasti pathetically looks tears in eyes and spit on his

bloodyface)

caprio comes with bundles.
[caprio]

(spreading hand with bundle to wards sebasti.)

assole !
give it to him

(sebasti looks at mark)

p.o.v(sebasti)

mark standing next to jeep.

[sebasti]
(turning back to caprio)
i got something to give you mother fucker!!

[caprio]
(confused)
what?

[sebasti]
(taking out gun from waist)
this !

p.o.v(mark}

(sebasti pointg gun towards caprio)
(gun shot)
(caprio fall back)

fade out
fade in
p.o.v(sebasti)
(caprio body lying down with blooded dot on fore head)
fade out
fade in
(mark gets on jeep , winds the broken wire together.
and starts the jeep.
reaches sebasti and takes gun from his hand.

fade out
fade in.

(markshows photos in front of sebasti.

keep these face identity in you mind,
caprio's dad will be questioning about who did it.
Then you will take name of these two guys!!

ok

[sebasti looking shocked]

[sebasti]
so it's all scripted from beginning?

[mark]
none of your business.
just be bothered about saving your ass.
plus,
great future, i promised !


(sebasti hope lessly looking at mark and phot in his hand)


[mark]

the left side photo of guy,
name mortaza
he got lisp.
second guy ,
romeo
he is lefty.
that much is enough.

(keeping back the photos within)

leave the body and gun.
i'll pick it up.
take all the money in suitcase back to his dad.
(mark keeping bundles back in suitecase)
it will build trust on you.
inform his dad KABICHA, that these people took him along with

boxes.
and you got wounded while fighting against them.

(sebasti just looking at mark)

don't mind

[sebasti]
(hugging mark and tears in eyes)
my family

[mark]
i have promised,
you will be leaving the gang soon and will be out .
you will be living good life far from here.

trust me
ok
[sebasti]
ya
[mark]
ok,
now get on car ,
just do what i have said !

(sebasti gets on car, mark puts suitcase inside.
car starts and leave.

mark watching car leaving.
mark walking towards jeep

mark get head phone to ear.
)

[mark]

ya !!
copy that
you hear me.

[pause]

ya mole inserted.

trial will be seen within 3 days.
yup.
over.

(mark gets on jeep and leaves)


fade out
fade in
(tagline:3 days later)

int. marks house.
(mark on chair infront of dining table reading news paper

drinking coffeee.
mobile rings.
mark answering phone)
yes sir

v.o.(mobile voice)
turn on television.
switch on local news channel, son.
you made it.


(gets on sofa, uses remote)

v.o(television news reader)

so, this kind of incidents by anti social elements ,
gang war, reason behind this, philip ?

v.o(tv news journalist)
yes maria !

the guys who got attcked are said to be higher hands in mafia

world.
they both are sons of mafia king leo.
it is said that attack on them happened as retaliation from

kabeecha's gang ,whose son named caprio dissapeared.
caprio dead body was found two days ago.
it is said that, leo son's were resposible for the death of

kabeecha's son.

one of them who came under attack ,
named mortaza is dead.
other son named romeo is said to be critically injured and no

hope of survival.


v.o(maria)

(stopping philip)
so, where are these policing personnel?
what are they doing?

v.o.(philip)
well,
cops hesitant to intervene and provide any kind of protection

to any side in this situation.

interestingly, you might remember that two and half years ago ,

a cops family was hunted down in their own house for daring

agianst mafia.

That cop name was smith, if I am right.

It is said that , it was these two brothers who orchestrad it.

after that , police don't dare to question mafia.
it is this kind of situation that made , small gang like

kabeech's grow and take over leo's.

(mark uses remote.television switches off)

fade out.

end.
 
Last edited:
I know what you mean.

If i script writer keeps doing spoon feeding,
where is the room for designation called- director and cameraman and may be even dialogue writer.

Whichever the way I have written, is enough for experienced director to understand.
I don't expect juniors to come and learn something from me.

I just want experienced director to step in and take up the task.
There is nothing extra needed to be inserted , to make matured directors to understand.


format is necessary to those who enter new to field.

this is how experienced guys work.

the scenes get orally told(explained) , and it's understood.
may be , they work on rough sheet if necessary.

the director, camera guy and actors take it on.

I don't even expect kids/new guys to take up my script and perfect on screen.

if they really want to learn and gain experience and become familiar with movie making..
better they learn to adjust to the style i have said.

or else just fuck off .
 
..............


format is necessary to those who enter new to field.

this is how experienced guys work.

the scenes get orally told(explained) , and it's understood.
may be , they work on rough sheet if necessary.

the director, camera guy and actors take it on.

I don't even expect kids/new guys to take up my script and perfect on screen.

.....................
Yep, formats are for amateurs.
I think you can even loosen your way of writing a little more.
This might be an inspiration:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HDW...ure=player_detailpage&x-yt-cl=84838260#t=3610

:P


However, I think formatting is there to keep overview. Overview helps everyone to save time and money.
But that's just me.
I know nothing about filmmaking. I'm just spending some time here ;)
 
Whichever the way I have written, is enough for experienced director to understand.... I just want experienced director to step in and take up the task.
If the purpose of a script were only to give a director an understanding of your story, maybe your attitude would be a little more acceptable. Unfortunately for you though that is not the purpose of a script, a script is a working document, formatted in a particular way which makes it easily understandable and usable as a working document for a wide variety of filmmaking personnel. The first task that an experienced director would have to "take up" would therefore be to hire a script-writer who can actually produce a usable script. Why would an experienced director bother when they have the choice of thousands of scripts which are already "├╝sable"? Experienced directors would instantly see your script is not in a usable state and not waste their time reading it in the first place!

...better they learn to adjust to the style i have said.
You're suggesting the entire film industry should adapt to your style, why would the film industry do that rather than sticking with the style which is proven to work?

G
 
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