watch New Music video! Check it out!

[brettzdamn]

First off i want to post this hear because a while back i posted about doing a music video with all static shots. Thats what i ending up doing but i created paning and zooms in AE . I think it came out pretty good. You cant even tell that the movement was done in post. Check it out and let me get some feed back!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1NAIvaNyx8c
By the way, I directed, Edited and its me rapping =)
I Had my friend put the camera on a tripod and focus (DP)

 

[Jsthompson79]

Awesome.

Awesome. Nothing more needs to be said. But I will elaborate a little more. The scene you set with the video goes hand and hand with the song. I find it hard to believe you're only 17 and put this production together. Keep up the hard work and I am sure good things will come your way.

 

[brettzdamn]

Awesome. Nothing more needs to be said. But I will elaborate a little more. The scene you set with the video goes hand and hand with the song. I find it hard to believe you're only 17 and put this production together. Keep up the hard work and I am sure good things will come your way.

Thanks man i really aprcieate it! And i really hope So!

 

[Zensteve]

I dig the angst & confusion in your song.

The video fell flat for me, though. Some of your locations are established to match lyrics up front... and then that seems to be about it. I'm not understanding the changes between addressing the camera, and then ignoring it scant cuts later. Your poorly-lit locations are not really interesting, either. Tbh, the only interesting shots are the shadow-plays, and there's just a couple of those. (Also, sitting down can make it difficult to project energy.)

Meh, re-written this a few times now. Here it is. You lack presence, in this video.

You, as a performer, need to engage the audience more. The video needs to be about you. It doesn't need to be 33% you, with 66% of the screen either unlit, blank wall, or asphalt.

You have a good song. Actually, it's really good. I know you're "only" 17.

I still think you can do better.

How did you go about designing your video?

This prolly ain't the feedback you're hopin' for, but I'm being honest.

 

[brettzdamn]

Actualy steve i really aprecieate the honest feed back.
To be honest with u... I didnt really plan the video at all (alittle But not much). We were hanging out at my friends Neigborhood Club house parking lot and it just so happend i had myy camera and i thought the spot under the light looked good. On Top of it, i was the only person their with Dp Skills and of course i wasnt able to Dp it So we just locked it down on a tripod. . Then after we shot the room in scene in my room and only had one light. But i think for my next video im going to hier a Dp Or find one of my friends that actualy know how to work a camera Also i did all the shots of me sitting down to kinda portray the "lonley" Fact if u know what im trying to say

 

[Ernest Worthing]

Im going to have to echo Steve here.

But im glad to see your taking the criticism in a useful manner and are thinking about how to make a better video.

I look forward to watching the next one.

 

[ussinners]

Everything looked and sounded really good.

I like the composition of the shots. But, the problem I see is, you're basically the same distance from the camera each time. So, even though you're changing locations, our eyes aren't really moving.

If you're using an editing system that can add movement, add a lot. If you can increase the size of the frame, do it to some shots. This way you have CUs, medium, movement. It will give the viewer something to really watch.

You should use Fuck a lot less. You seem to be more intelligent then that. A few well placed fucks go a lot further to enhance then a steady stream. You fucking got me?

 

[brettzdamn]

Everything looked and sounded really good.

I like the composition of the shots. But, the problem I see is, you're basically the same distance from the camera each time. So, even though you're changing locations, our eyes aren't really moving.

If you're using an editing system that can add movement, add a lot. If you can increase the size of the frame, do it to some shots. This way you have CUs, medium, movement. It will give the viewer something to really watch.

I will deffinatly keep that in mind when shooting the next video! thanks alot for those tips! And I use Adboe Premeire and AE for edditing!

 

[brettzdamn]

You should use Fuck a lot less. You seem to be more intelligent then that. A few well placed fucks go a lot further to enhance then a steady stream. You fucking got me?

I know belive me, ive herd that alot, as you can tell from the lyrics I was in a dark place when i wrote that song. My other songs have alot less curse words. Actualy one of my new songs im recording tomarrow has 0 curse words

 

[rockerrockstar]

To me the video really did not show much other then a guy sitting rapping in different locations. Too much sitting and rapping if you ask me. Nothing really happens in the video it is just a guy pretty much sitting and rapping and later standing and rapping then back to sitting and rapping.

Anyways, I can just think the song sounded pretty good but the video did not live up to the song. Something needs to happen in the video. It probably needs to have a 3 arc story in the video. It is ok showing the guy rapping but something needs to happen in the video. It would be good if there were more than just one person in the video too.

I also think a close up of the guys face rapping probably would have been a good idea now and then.

From the song I get an impression of an influence of Eminem. I keep thinking of 8 mile for some reason. Anyways, I think this video needs to show the guy trying to make it in this hard world and down on his luck. Maybe being evicted from his home or something. Girlfriend dumps him. Maybe being fired. Writing music while living in the hard times should maybe be the theme similar to 8 mile the movie I guess. Then later show things getting better maybe close to a record contract or just playing a venue and finding new girlfriend and making money. Just an idea. The lyrics of the song imply a guy trying to make it while making music.

Another idea is to have the guy really down on his luck then start doing crime (like robbing houses or stealing cars) then get busted by the cops at the end.

I think I would cut the scenes where he is in the parking lot rapping sitting and put in something else. I like the scenes with him rapping in the house and the mirror scenes. The outside scenes in the parking lot need to go I think.

Maybe show a scene where a bad guy trys to get rough with a girl in the streets and you protect her and get in a fight with the guy. That could be cool. So if you show the rapper as guy that does crimes to pay to do music and get his way out of that life. But he does a good deed to save the girl to make his self more of a hero. Then at the end show him get busted buy the cops to make people feel bad for him. Maybe show him rapping in jail at the end. Ha....

 

[brettzdamn]

To me the video really did not show much other then a guy sitting rapping in different locations. Too much sitting and rapping if you ask me. Nothing really happens in the video it is just a guy pretty much sitting and rapping and later standing and rapping then back to sitting and rapping.

Anyways, I can just think the song sounded pretty good but the video did not live up to the song. Something needs to happen in the video. It probably needs to have a 3 arc story in the video. It is ok showing the guy rapping but something needs to happen in the video. It would be good if there were more than just one person in the video too.

I also think a close up of the guys face rapping probably would have been a good idea now and then.

From the song I get an impression of an influence of Eminem. I keep thinking of 8 mile for some reason. Anyways, I think this video needs to show the guy trying to make it in this hard world and down on his luck. Maybe being evicted from his home or something. Girlfriend dumps him. Maybe being fired. Writing music while living in the hard times should maybe be the theme similar to 8 mile the movie I guess. Then later show things getting better maybe close to a record contract or just playing a venue and finding new girlfriend and making money. Just an idea. The lyrics of the song imply a guy trying to make it while making music.

Another idea is to have the guy really down on his luck then start doing crime (like robbing houses or stealing cars) then get busted by the cops at the end.

I think I would cut the scenes where he is in the parking lot rapping sitting and put in something else. I like the scenes with him rapping in the house and the mirror scenes. The outside scenes in the parking lot need to go I think.

Maybe show a scene where a bad guy trys to get rough with a girl in the streets and you protect her and get in a fight with the guy. That could be cool. So if you show the rapper as guy that does crimes to pay to do music and get his way out of that life. But he does a good deed to save the girl to make his self more of a hero. Then at the end show him get busted buy the cops to make people feel bad for him. Maybe show him rapping in jail at the end. Ha....

Thanks dude im glad u like the song, thats me rapping by the way and Yeah i totaly understand where ur comming from about the lack of story in the video. But if u read at the top it was just me and a tripod and zero dollar budget i had no real DP. So i could not do moving shots or any complexity. My next video im Probably going to hier a Dp And put a 200 dollar budget on the video itself, so the video will have a side story and everything real videos have. I really like your ideas though, im deffinatly going to keep them in mind when planing my next video!

 

[Zensteve]

when planning my next video

You maybe redoing this one, or moving on to the next with better clarity?

Either way... just remember that there's a lot of free advice/opinions (and horse-dookey ) here on the forums, if you need ideas or suggestions on how to prepare for the next vid.

 

[brettzdamn]

You maybe redoing this one, or moving on to the next with better clarity?

Either way... just remember that there's a lot of free advice/opinions (and horse-dookey ) here on the forums, if you need ideas or suggestions on how to prepare for the next vid.

Im going to be moving on to the next one,

and no doubt i get the best advice from this forum, Weather i make a post or just read other peoples im always learning when i come on hear!