icompetition ideas

[dlevanchuk]

Hey guys,
I want to enter next week competition at filmfights.com, and this project rules are the dialog suppose to open with the line "if it wasn't for my.......". Length is no more than 3:30 mins. So here are some of my brainstormed ideas..

1. line is "if it wasn't for my awesomeness, I wouldn't get what I have",
Highly arrogant guy shows off his car to his friends during high school reunion, his fancy job, bank account. He has nice house, big paycheck, and acts likea douche. He sees a girl waiting outside the building, so he hits on her, and tries to grab hwer because he is "all that" until girl boyfriend shows up and kocks the living hell out of the guy..

2. "If it wasn't for my Pookie, all these men would be alive"
A man goes on a killing spree because the bandits got his wordly possesion - his childhood teddy bear.

3. "If it wasn't for my camera, I wouldn't make my awesome blockbuster"
Three arrogant guys trying to make a movie, by buying the most expensive camera, no sound equipment (camera has sound), lightning (using the ipod flashlight app), and script (script is for pussies, we re the freestylers!). Pretty much a satire on how arrogant new filmmakers fail making a movie

Which one should I do? Any more ideas?
It will be my second video short, using small video camera ($120) and cheap tripod, so its kind of a short movie/excersise..

 

[Ernest Worthing]

i like number 2 the best.

3 is a nice idea but it only film makers would get the in jokes (like no sound equipment).

 

[Ccolebrook]

I agree. #2 is the best one.

 

[wheatgrinder]

fun.. Ill have to look into those filmfights...

yes, #2 is the best, though its not something I would pick for myself..

 

[dlevanchuk]

OK, so after more brainstorimg, and watching my coworkers around me, I came up with this nat-s**t-crazy idea.... follow me on this one lol.

Opening line: "If it wasn't for my Old Lady, I would be dead by now".

Plot. Man suspects that his REFRIGERATOR is having a love affair with his TOASTER... He comes home after work, and finds them two in the process, causing him to murder the toaster...

I was springing the idea from watching my co worker talking about food. They don't just TALK about food.. they have some most weird discussion about sauses, dishes, appliances.. food is like porn to them! So, food is in the fridge, thats why the main "female" figure is the fridge. THe toaster is a "bad guy", because.. well.. nobody really uses toaster, and it just kind of sits on the kitchen table..

Here is a scrip. Sorry its not formatted. I copy/pasted it straight from the Cletx, and it didn't save the format

EXT. OFFICE BLDG PARKING LOT - EVENING

A dozen employees are leaving the building, and getting into their cars, leaving work. MIKE (25) and coworker both exiting the office building, walking through the parking lot towards their cars.

MIKE
I'm telling you, man.. If it wasn't for my old lady, I would be dead. You know?

COWORKER
I know. Mine was crazy last night! I kept eating and eating out of it, but she just kept of just kept on coming!

Mike and coworker approached their cars. Mike starts opening his door.

MIKE
Yea.. but lately its been acting kind of funny.. its been running out of food too often.. sometimes the door jams.. and get this! Couple of night ago I found some bread crumbs in there!

COWORKER
I'm sure you it is fine. How long did you have that fridge for? Four years? Five?

MIKE
Yea, you're right.. Well, I'll see you tomorrow.

COWORKER
All right! I'll go back to mine. I've heard tonight is a barbecue night!

MIKE
Get a room you two!

Coworker laughs through the open car window, and leaves. Mike sits into his car, and drives off.

EXT. HOUSE - NIGHT

Mikes car pulls into a parking lot. He opens his car door, and walk up to the mail box. Opens it up. Pulls out an magazine with PLAYBOY title and a picture of fridges. Mike smiles, and puts it in his inner coat.

Mike walks up to his front door. He hears the fridge door getting SLAMMED CLOSED and QUICKLY OPENS. Mike carefully puts his key in the door, and opens a door.

INT. ENTRANCE - NIGHT

The sounds stops. Mike suspiciously puts his bag on the floor.

MIKE
Hey..

Silence.

MIKE
I'm good.. What was that noise?

Silence.

MIKE
Oh, exercising... OK.

Mike slowly walks up the stairs into a kitchen.

INT. KITCHEN - NIGHT

MIKE
So.. whats there to eat?

He jerks towards the door, and quickly opens it. A TOASTER is inside the fridge.

Mike sees it, and slowly starts backing up.

MIKE
(disbelief)
I.. i knew it...

Dramatic music.

Mike
How long has this been going on?

Looks at the toaster.

MIKE
(yelling)
SHUT UP! You shut you god damn bread slots! This is between between me and her.

Mike sits down on the floor, starts to weep.

MIKE
I can't believe this..

Silence.

MIKE
So what he has longer chord! I though you were fine with using extension cable..

Shot of the toaster.

MIKE
I said don't even try to make another sound!

Two breads jump out of the bread slots.

MIKE
You son of a bitch!

Mike grabs the toaster and starts punching it.

MIKE
You piece of useless crap! Can't even make a good grilled sandwich and you are in my kitchen!!

Mike looks over his shoulder and sees the sink.

MIKE
I though we were friends!

Mike turns on water, and shoves the toaster in the bucket.

After he calms down he sits down and starts crying. He looks up at the fridge.

MIKE
Pack you fruits and get out of here.

Silence

MIKE
Now!

INT. DAY - KITCHEN

Man is sitting on the kitchen floor and eating crackers out of the box. Tear comes down his face.

THE END.

What do you guys think? I want to work on improving the toaster killing scene, "dialog" wise...

 

[Murdock]

A Batman Spoof

If it wasnt for my butler, Alfred I'd be dead a hundred times over. Right Robin?? Remember that time when he put out the acid

proof leotard?? Be dambed if the joker didnt dip us in that vat of.....You guessed it, acid that very same day. By the way how did

you protect your legs? What?! Alfred packed acid proof panty hose for you too?? Thats Alfred. Oh!! Remember that time I was

hanging from the helicopter with a F*cking shark hanging on my leg. Good thing ALfred packed the Oceanic repellents bat spray

kit. And I dont need to tell you that the shark repellent is part of that kit. If it wasnt for my friend alfred, Id be dead a hundred

times over.