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watch End of the Tour...short psychological thriller

Hi guys,

I'd be very grateful if you could check out my latest short, End of the Tour, and let me know what you think.

http://www.youtube.com/user/scartissuefilms

It's in two parts and runs at around 14 minutes.

Shot on the HPX 500 and featuring some very good performaces from Marc Baylis, Miranada Keeling and Peter Halpin, hopefully you'll find it an interesting ride.

BTW...If anyone would be kind enough to subscribe to my Youtube Channel, I will gladly repay the favour.

All the best,

Rick Kinsella

Scar Tissue Films
 
Job well done in almost all aspects. The story captured me so much that I didn't even pay attention to see if any jump cuts were there (which it seemed like there weren't). The outside lighting was maybe a little too dark outside but I bought it because it added mystery in the beginning. I accepted the inside lighting and washed out look but some color correction would have been better in my opinion. BUT, I bought it and it kind of fit the mood of the story so you could keep it as is.

The story was well written and excellent twist at the end. It really kept me on my toes the whole time.

Indoor light again could have been better IMO but I have to admit, it wasn't bad. Once the lamp hit the ground I would have made sure the shadows had moved too. Also, I would have pointed a light on her so in a way it's kind of an interrogation of her. But since you kept the lighting basic it's really hard to do these kinds of clever effects effectively.

Acting was fantastic from all three, you should feel proud that you gave them a chance to show off their talent.

The indoor set was a bit dull but again, it kind of fit the mood because it didn't distract me from the story.

Framing of shots seemed fine but story gripped me so I didn't pay much attention to it and didn't want it to. Same goes for the continuity but I think most of it was fine. Maybe someone else could point out any issues because I would like to keep this film in my mind as great short.

Sound was good and no complaints here but again, I was captured by the story and didn't notice any of the small things which might be there.

But in all your film did what it should do, captivate your audience and that it did. Job well done and keep up the good work.
 
Job well done in almost all aspects. The story captured me so much that I didn't even pay attention to see if any jump cuts were there (which it seemed like there weren't). The outside lighting was maybe a little too dark outside but I bought it because it added mystery in the beginning. I accepted the inside lighting and washed out look but some color correction would have been better in my opinion. BUT, I bought it and it kind of fit the mood of the story so you could keep it as is.

The story was well written and excellent twist at the end. It really kept me on my toes the whole time.

Indoor light again could have been better IMO but I have to admit, it wasn't bad. Once the lamp hit the ground I would have made sure the shadows had moved too. Also, I would have pointed a light on her so in a way it's kind of an interrogation of her. But since you kept the lighting basic it's really hard to do these kinds of clever effects effectively.

Acting was fantastic from all three, you should feel proud that you gave them a chance to show off their talent.

The indoor set was a bit dull but again, it kind of fit the mood because it didn't distract me from the story.

Framing of shots seemed fine but story gripped me so I didn't pay much attention to it and didn't want it to. Same goes for the continuity but I think most of it was fine. Maybe someone else could point out any issues because I would like to keep this film in my mind as great short.

Sound was good and no complaints here but again, I was captured by the story and didn't notice any of the small things which might be there.

But in all your film did what it should do, captivate your audience and that it did. Job well done and keep up the good work.

Thank you for such complete feedback. It's very much appreciated. As always there are things that could be better...but we do what we can, don't we?
 
The acting from the lead was fantastic! The others were good too, but that guy was in a league of his own. Great short and the only complaint I could have is the washed out look on the interior shots.
 
Overall a great short, the acting was magnificent. I'm quite proud you're from the UK sir!

Representing.:yes:

The acting from the lead was fantastic! The others were good too, but that guy was in a league of his own. Great short and the only complaint I could have is the washed out look on the interior shots.

Cheers for your thoughts. The actors were great. We didn't have any time to rehearse, so they did really well.
 
Very nice. I have one little thing to point out. Nothing at all really. @ 3:04 of part II the lead says "you think I wont kill her after what she's......" this part. To me it really weakens the character. At that moment I knew what the ending was. I know it's a little late now, but I would have gone with something like:

Boyfriend - All right! You've made your point. Now leaveus alone.

Angryman - You fail to understand, friend. I'm not here to make points. I'm
here to kill you. I sincerely hope you understand that I am going to kill
you for shagging my wife!!!!...........and on with the original from there.

I'm not really a tech. guy so I can't comment in those areas but this bit really stuckout to me. Damb good film though. :)
 
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thats funny, i thought this sounded/looked familiar. i read this script on simplyscripts a couple days ago. well done

edit. not the same script.. this one is much better
 
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