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Dialog with no faces

Please help me out how to properly format the scene :(
The idea is to intoduce two characters with a dialog, however, i don't want to show their faces, but introduce different accessories that the characters are wearing WHILE they are exchanging dialog.
For example, I have an opening scene, with the character introducing for the first time. One of them, JOHN, is wearing military uniform, and his brother, MIKE, jeans , t-shirt, skate shoes.. The idea is that they will be exchanging some simple dialog (replaced with blah blah), and to show their personalities by their clothes.

EXT. BUS STOP - DAY

FADE IN

SKATE SHOES (belongs to MIKE (21) )
blah blah

CUT TO

MILITARY UNIFORM BUTTON (belongs to JOHN (24))
blah blah

CUT TO

JEAN POCKET (mike)
blah blah

CUT TO

MILITARY UNIFORM SHOES (john)
Blah blah..

well, i think you got the idea.. it just looks weird, and not right :-S
any tips on how to write it out properly??
 
I'd recommend "Celtx", this will assist you hugely on the format. It's a free download, so don't worry. What you're currently doing in the script is representing the characters via their attire. It should still remain

EXT. BUS STOP - NIGHT

MIKE
Blah blah blah

....

If you plan to direct this yourself, your methods of shooting should be side-notes in the margins, or struck out on another draft. Meaning, you tell the story on paper, but you direct with your notes, or scribbles, or whatever the hell you like--(CLOSE UP: SKATE SHOES)

This is pardon the "action" segment, which will be home to simply, to repeat myself, any "action" within your screenplay.

Preferably, I'd double up with a shot breakdown in an excel file, with the location, time, actors, props, costumes.


So, CELTX.

Also, perhaps a few screenwriting books, I'm sure the guys will follow with a few suggestions.
 
You're trying to tell the director what to do with the camera. The director doesn't care what you think. Just write a good story; don't tell me how to tell that story.

For your example, I think the best you can do is suggest where the camera might go:

EXT. BUS-STOP -- DAY

MIKE taps his shoes against his skateboard. Barely scuffled, his name-brand shoes are practically brand-new.

MIKE
No, but it's his attitude, man. He's always trying to tell me that I'm doing shit wrong.

JOHN
Yeah, cuz you are always doing shit wrong. Dude, how many times have you fucked me over, by not mis-ing your tables?

MIKE
(sarcastically)
Oh, yeah, cuz it takes so long to get somebody a soup spoon. Sorry for fucking you over.

John buttons-up the last button on his drab-green shirt.

JOHN
Whatever. Maybe, someday, you'll learn to pay attention to detail.

Mike reaches into his jean pocket to pull out a pack of cigs, and a lighter.

MIKE
Maybe, someday, you'll learn to shut your fucking face.

JOHN
Hey, can I bum one of those off you?

John leans back, lighting the cigarette Mike has given him. As he finds a comfortable spot on the wall to lean against, John crosses his legs, rythmically tapping his feet together, shoes shined to perfection, and pant-legs ironed crisp.
 
It's not intended for shots to be a side note, there will be a function on "Celtx" titled "Shot", click this, then insert your shot. This is simply if you are planning to shoot this yourself. If you're not, leave the shots, the transition cues out of it, shown here in bold.

EXT. BUS STOP - NIGHT

SHOT: WIDE

A faint orange glow. Mike, lights a cigarette, taking a drag in the next breath.

MIKE
Blah blah blah

CUT TO:
 
You're trying to tell the director what to do with the camera. The director doesn't care what you think. Just write a good story; don't tell me how to tell that story.

For your example, I think the best you can do is suggest where the camera might go:

EXT. BUS-STOP -- DAY

MIKE taps his shoes against his skateboard. Barely scuffled, his name-brand shoes are practically brand-new.

MIKE
No, but it's his attitude, man. He's always trying to tell me that I'm doing shit wrong.

JOHN
Yeah, cuz you are always doing shit wrong. Dude, how many times have you fucked me over, by not mis-ing your tables?

MIKE
(sarcastically)
Oh, yeah, cuz it takes so long to get somebody a soup spoon. Sorry for fucking you over.

John buttons-up the last button on his drab-green shirt.

JOHN
Whatever. Maybe, someday, you'll learn to pay attention to detail.

Mike reaches into his jean pocket to pull out a pack of cigs, and a lighter.

MIKE
Maybe, someday, you'll learn to shut your fucking face.

JOHN
Hey, can I bum one of those off you?

John leans back, lighting the cigarette Mike has given him. As he finds a comfortable spot on the wall to lean against, John crosses his legs, rythmically tapping his feet together, shoes shined to perfection, and pant-legs ironed crisp.

Admittedly it's very difficult to resist the temptation to add in filmmaking touches you'd like to see. At least it is for me.
 
dlevanchuk, , are you writing this script to direct. Or are you
hoping to use this as a writing sample to land an agent or to
sell?

Cracker has an excellent option if you will not be directing this
script. The shots used are not what the writer decides. Even if
the writer has great ideas for how a scenes should be shot, the
script is where the story comes to life, the production is where
the shots are worked out.

If you are directing then you can write in each shot. You could
use the old Syd Field method that Papertwin suggests:

EXT. BUS STOP - DAY

FADE IN

ON SKATE SHOES (belongs to MIKE (21) )

MIKE
blah blah


ON MILITARY UNIFORM BUTTON (belongs to JOHN (24))

JOHN
blah blah

ON JEAN POCKET

MIKE
blah blah

ON MILITARY UNIFORM SHOES

JOHN
Blah blah..
 
You could use a GLOSSARY of TERMS for screenwriters. Attribution at the bottom.

A


AERIAL SHOT

Use only when necessary. This suggests a shot be taken from a plane or helicopter (not a crane). For example, if a scene takes place on a tall building, you may want to have an aerial shot of the floor the action takes place on.

ANGLE ON

A type of shot. This usually occurs in scenes taking place in large settings.
For example: if you're at a playground and little Billy is playing in the grass while his sister Jenny is playing on the structure. To get from a detail shot of Billy playing to Jenny playing you'd use "ANGLE ON STRUCTURE" to suggest a new shot featuring Jenny. You're still in the same location, but the director knows to point the camera a different direction.

Note: this is often implied by simple scene description. Use ANGLE ON with good purpose.

B


b.g. (background)

Used to describe anything occuring in a rear plane of action (the background as opposed to the main action or attention is focused in the foreground). Always use this term in lower case initials or written in full ("background"). For example: two people talk as Bill and Ted fight in the b.g.

C



CLOSE ON

See also INSERT and Shot.

CLOSE ON is a shot description that strongly suggests a close-up on some object, action, or person (an expressive body part such as the face, or a fist).

May also be seen as CLOSEUP or CLOSE SHOT

CLOSER ANGLE

We move in for a new angle nearer to the subject. This is more of an editing term, but can be mentioned in the screenplay when necessary.




CROSSFADE:

This is like a "Fade to black then Fade to next scene." In other words, as one scene fades out, a moment of black interrupts before the next scene fades in. It is not to be confused with DISSOLVE, since CROSSFADE always involves a black or blank screen. (Note: I'm not sure if this term is still in common use)

CUT TO:

The most simple and common transition. Since this transition is implied by a change of scene, it may be used sparingly to help intensify character changes and emotional shifts. The transition describes a change of scene over the course of one frame.

D



DISSOLVE TO:

A common transition. As one scene fades out, the next scene fades into place. This type of transition is generally used to convey some passage of time and is very commonly used in montages such as seen in Bugsy.

E

ESTABLISHING SHOT:

A shot, usually from a distance, that shows us where we are. A shot that suggests location. Often used at the beginning of a film to suggest where the story takes place. For example, if our story takes place in New York, we might use a shot of the Manhattan skyline as an establishing shot.


EXTREMELY LONG SHOT (XLS):

Basically self-defined. Means the camera is placed an undefined, very long distance from the subject or action. Generally, this term would be left out of a screenplay and left to the director to decide. Use only when necessary.

F

FADE TO:

See also DISSOLVE TO:

This is commonly used as a DISSOLVE to a COLOR. Commonly, you'll see this as:

FADE TO:

BLACK

FADE IN:

NEXT SCENE

This usually suggests it's not the end of the movie, but it is the end of a major movement in the film. The "Next Scene" is often days, months, or years after the previous scenes. Sometimes titles will appear in the blackness to declare a passage of time. But this transition is often a sign of a major shift in time or emotional status for the main characters. It may also be used to suggest a character has been knocked out or killed.

FAVOR ON

A particular character or action is highlighted or "favored" in a shot. The focus is basically centered on someone or something in particular. Use only when necessary.



FREEZE FRAME:

The picture stops moving, becoming a still photograph, and holds for a period of time.

I

INSERT

When a writer pictures a certain close-up at a certain moment in the film, he or she may use an insert shot. This describes a shot of some important detail in a scene that must be given the camera's full attention for a moment. Inserts are mainly used in reference to objects, a clock, or actions, putting a key in a car's ignition.
For example: if there's a clock in the room. I, as the writer, might have reason for the audience to get a good glimpse of the clock. I would use an insert shot to suggest the director get a closer shot of the clock at a particular point in the scene.

Note: often; writing important objects in CAPS will convey their importance in the scene and give the director more freedom and a greater feeling of importance. Use inserts only when truly important.


INTO FRAME:

see also: INTO VIEW:

The audience can only see so much through the window of a movie screen. Use this term to suggest something or someone comes into the picture while the camera stays put. It's like a character or object coming from off stage in the theater. For example: Forrest Gump sits on the bench.

OLD WOMAN INTO FRAME. She sits next to him.

INTO VIEW:

see also: INTO FRAME:

The audience can only see so much through the window of a movie screen. Use this term to suggest something or someone comes into the picture while the camera pulls back (pans, etc) to reveal more of the scene.

Iris Out

see also wipe.

Also written as: IRIS FADE OUT or IRIS FADE IN. Used at the end of Star Wars scripts, this term refers to a wipe from the center of the frame out in all directions. It's as if the iris of a human eye were opening for dimly lit situations to take us into the next scene or the ending credits as is the case with Star Wars.

J

JUMP CUT TO:

A transition. Imagine setting a camera down to film a person. You record him for five minutes. But as it turns out, you have only a one minute time limit on your project. You have no special editing tools, just a couple of VCR's. But you realize that most of the important stuff is said in a few short moments. If you cut out the unimportant parts and edit together the parts you want based on a single camera angle, you will have what are called jump cuts. Transitions from one moment to the next within a scene that appear jarring because they break the direct flow of filmic time and space. This transition is usually used to show a very brief ellipsis of time. A good example of Jump Cuts can be seen in the movie Elizabeth when the queen practices her speech. The jump cuts make us disoriented and nervous along with the queen, giving us the tension and humor of the situation as if it were an out-take reel. Bad examples of Jump Cuts would be in B-movies like Mothra where they don't have the money to get scenes from various angles, so they cut from one important moment to the next from the same angle.

L

LAP DISSOLVE:

See also DISSOLVE: A transition between scenes that is achieved by fading out one shot while the next one grows clearer.

M

MATCH CUT TO:

A transition often used to compare two completely unrelated objects. It's film's version of metaphor. This involves cutting from one object of certain color, shape, and/or movement, to another object of similar color, shape, and/or movement. For example, a circular saw to a child's merry-go-round. A commonly studied example of match cutting comes from 2001: A Space Odyssey. The classic cut comes towards the beginning of the film. After the apes have used a bone as a weapon for gathering food, an ape throws the bone into the air. As it falls, we match cut to a space ship carrying nuclear warheads. Both the bone and the ship are of similar shape and color, and both happen to be moving towards the bottom of the screen. The cut relates all of technology to the development of weaponry as it cuts out all of human history.

MATCH DISSOLVE TO:

See also MATCH CUT TO:, DISSOLVE TO:

This contains similar qualities to the MATCH CUT. A match dissolve involves two objects of similar color, shape, and/or movement in transition from one scene to the next.
For example: if Scene A is following (tracking) an arrow whizzing through the forest, I might match dissolve to a tracking shot, in Scene B of a bullet whizzing through the inner city.

Montage

In film, a series of images showing a theme, a contradiction, or the passage of time. This film style became common in Russia in the early years of cinema. Russians were the first to truly use editing to tell a story. Some early examples of montage include City Symphony's and Man With a Movie Camera. Modern day examples of montages can be seen in Kramer vs. Kramer and Bugsy.


O


P

Pan

Camera movement involving the camera turning on a stationary axis. Imagine standing in one spot on a cliff in Hawaii. You want to absorb the view so you, without moving your body or feet, turn your head from the left to the right. This is the same effect as a pan.

See Also: Swish Pan

Parenthetical

If an actor should deliver his or her lines in a particular way, a screenplay will contain a description in parentheses to illustrate the point. Parentheticals should be used only in cases where a line of dialog should be read in some way contrary to logic. If used too often, actor's and director's egos get hurt, and things get messy.
For Example:
JULIE
(calmly)
I hate you. I hate you. I hate you.


POV

Point of View. The camera replaces the eyes (sometimes the ears) of a character, monster, machine, surveillance camera, etc. As a result, we get to see the world through the sensory devices of some creature. This can be used to bring out the personal aspects of a scene, or it can be used to build horror and suspense. An example of horror and suspense in POV can be scene in the opening shot of Halloween.

PUSH IN:

The camera physically moves towards a subject.

R

REVERSE ANGLE

Often used to reveal things for comic or dramatic effect. Could be described as a counter POV shot. Basically, the script suggests the camera come around 180 degrees to get a shot from the "other side" of a scene. For example, in the Something About Maryscript, Tucker is playing a joke on Mary in her office in one scene that the writers didn't want to reveal right away. They use a REVERSE ANGLE to show that he's got two tongue depressors in his upper lip to represent teeth. This reverse angle is used for comic effect.

ROLL

This is a term used for superimposed titles or text intended to move vertically on screen. For example, the text at the beginning of Star Wars movies.

S


Shot

One image. If there's a cut, you've changed shots. Shots can range from split seconds, like in Terminator 2, to several minutes, such as in Secrets and Lies or the opening sequence of Halloween. Shots are generally chosen by the director although the writer can use capital letters to suggest where the camera should be. When a writer absolutely must have a certain shot at a certain moment in a film, he has a few options each described in detail elsewhere in this list: INSERT, ANGLE ON, and CLOSE ON.

SPLIT SCREEN SHOT:

The space of the frame is split into two, three, or more frames each with their own subject. Usually the events shown in each section of the split screen are simultaneous. But Split screen can also be used to show flashbacks or other events. For example, two people are talking on the phone. They're in different locations, but you wish to show the reactions of both simultaneously. Or, watch Run, Lola, Run to see another use of split screen.

Steadicam

A camera built to remain stable while being moved, usually by human hands. Occasionally, seen in scripts to suggest a handheld shot be used in a scene.

STOCK SHOT:

Footage of events in history, from other films, etc. Basically, anything that's already filmed and you intend to be edited into the movie. For example, the Austin Powers movies use stock footage for comic effect. Some old B films use stock footage to keep their budgets low.

SUPER:

Abbreviation for superimpose. The superimposition of one thing over another in the same shot. Sometimes TITLES are superimposed over scenes. Or a face can be superimposed over a stream-of-consciousness montage shot. It's up to you!

Swish Pan

A quick snap of the camera from one object to another. This high speed movement causes the image to go completely blurry. Imagine yourself in the center of a merry-go-round that's moving really really fast. Aside from making you totally dizzy, the world becomes a blur, swished out in the movement, like a giant and constant swish pan. Cuts are often hidden in swish pans. Or they can be used to disorient or shock the audience. For a good example of Swish Pan, watch certain old episodes of The Twilight Zone.

T

TIGHT ON

A close-up of a person or thing. Basically, like the space has been squeezed out of the area between camera and subject. Not in common use. Use only when necessary.

TIME CUT

When you want to cut to later in a scene, you have the option of writing TIME CUT as the transition. For example, if two people walk into a restaurant and their conversation is important at first then veers off into topics not important to your story, then you might want to time cut from the drinks to the main course and then again to paying the check.

Tracking Shot (Track, Tracking)

In short, a tracking shot involves a camera following a person or an object. As long as the camera isn't locked down in place by a tripod, for example, and is following (tracking) a subject, then it's a tracking shot. For good examples of tracking shots, watch the one take episode of The X-Files or most any episode of ER. Star Wars Episode One has tracking shots galore during the pod race. And I'm sure most films have some form of tracking shot or another. (It'd make a good drinking game)


Transition

These describe the style in which one scene becomes the next. Used appropriately, these can be used to convey shifts in character development and emotion. In other words, a CUT TO: is not required at every scene change. Some major transitions include CUT TO:, DISSOLVE TO:, MATCH CUT TO:, JUMP CUT TO:, SMASH CUT TO:, WIPE TO:, and FADE TO:. Each term has it's own entry in this list of terms. Occasionally a writer will make up his own transition. In these cases, the transition is usually self-defined (such as BRIGHT WHITE FLASH TO: suggests whiteness will fill the screen for a brief moment as we pass into the next scene). For formatting info on transitions, see the Format page.

V

V.O.

Voice Over. This is the abbreviation sometimes seen next to the CHARACTER'S name before certain bits of dialog. This means the character voices that dialog but his or her moving lips are not present in the scene. Voice over is generally used for narration, such as in the beginning of The Mummy. Or, as Austin Powers would say, a character's inner monolog. The inner thought processes of the character said out loud such that only the audience will hear it. An general example of Voice Over can be seen (heard, actually) in Election or in the Sixth Season Finale of The X-Files.

W

WIPE TO:

A transition in which one scene "wipes away" for the next. Imagine Scene A is water and Scene B is the substance underneath. A wipe would look like a squeegee pulling Scene A off of Scene B. These usually suggest a passage of time from one scene to the next. The most common and obvious example of wipes is in the Star Wars franchise. You can also watch The Mummy for more examples.

Z

ZOOM:

The image seems to close in on a person or object making the person or object appear larger (or smaller) on screen. Technically, the lens mechanically changes from wide angle to telephoto or vice versa. Notice and recognize the difference between a zoom and a push in (camera moves closer to subject). Use zoom only when necessary. For an example of zoom, see Boogie Nights.



Please note that this glossary originally appeared on a website under the webmaster Dana Franklin. Dana no longer maintains the site.
 
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