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Another Mini-Film. Did I succeed in telling the story (Part 3)?


I’ve been posting these “mini-films” on here and getting some good feedback. I thought I’d post this one too and see if there are any thoughts. To me, these are films which aren’t quite substantial enough to be considered short films, but still aim to tell a mini story.

What do you think of this one? Did I fail to get the story across within the short runtime? Are there massive directorial blunders which left my narrative in ruins? You decide! Woo!
 
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Personally I'd have connected some shots together (I don't see the necessity to have a shot for the protagonist waking up, another one for her taking the cellphone, aaand another one for her reacting to it for example), but apart from this it was overall pretty good 👍
 
Yooooo there's no clink when they put the glasses together!! YOU GOTTA HAVE A CLINK
 
Personally I'd have connected some shots together (I don't see the necessity to have a shot for the protagonist waking up, another one for her taking the cellphone, aaand another one for her reacting to it for example), but apart from this it was overall pretty good 👍
Good point. Me too. I cut the shots up in post for pacing reasons, but I wish I would have gotten the moment right in one shot in production. Thanks for watching!
 
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