Quick formatting question

[Freestyle]

I'm writing a sequence where two scenes run concurrently. So far I have the sluglines doing something like this:

OLD FOLK'S HOME

GUN STORE

OLD FOLK'S HOME (CONT'D)

GUN STORE (CONT'D)

OLD FOLK'S HOME (CONT'D)

etc.

I'm sure there's a better way to do this, but it's not yet in my repertoire. Anybody?

 

[FantasySciFi]

Just use the "intercut":

INT. OLD FOLK'S HOME - DAY

Gramps gathers his posse - TOM, PHINEAS and CHARLENE.

Gramps goes to Tom in his rocker.

                          GRAMPS
             Charlie's gonna need our help.

Tom looks up, tired, reluctant.  Beat.  Nods and rises.

                                                              INTERCUT WITH:

INT. GUN STORE - DAY

Lloyd stands behind the counter eyeing STEVE in his trenchcoat.

                            LLOYD
             Can I help you with somethin'?

Steve glances back at him, gives a silent snort.

                            STEVE
              Did I ask for help, old man?

OLD FOLKS HOME

Gramps and Tom approach a woman knitting.

                            GRAMPS
               Char, are you up for an adventure.

She turns around with a toothy grin.

                            CHARLENE
                Like ol' times?

Gramps smiles and winks.

GUN STORE

Steve picks up a few boxes of ammunition and struts towards
the counter.

etc.

                                                           END INTERCUT:

"Intercut" alerts the reader and editor that you'll be jumping back and forth. Then you just use the abbreviated sluglines to help keep straight where the actions are happening. When finished just use the "END INTERCUT:" Some picky readers will insist you simply use the standard sluglines without the "(Cont'd)". The "intercut" technique is slowly becoming more common but is by no means 'standard'.
If this is for your own production, it is a convenient method. Sticking with the standard slugline approach, while clunky, should meet approval with stricter readers.

 

[Freestyle]

Thanks!

 

[directorik]

Some picky readers will insist you simply use the standard sluglines without the "(Cont'd)".

I'm one of those picky, stricter readers. I prefer standard sluglines
and not "intercut". I do not feel I need to be alerted about what is
going to happen when I'm reading a screenplay. In fact, I almost
resent it when writers feel they need to, essentially, talk down to
me. But I'm one of those picky, stricter readers.

 

[harmonica44]

As a picky reader, doesn't doing all these constant sluglines back and forth, cause the script to come off longer on paper, than it is, since it's roughly one page per minute? I wrote a script that is 118 pages, that is a lot of back and forth cutting like that, but I bet if it was filmed it would only be 90-100 minutes.

 

[jax_rox]

Having the right sluglines IMO is essential, not just to avoid confusion from a reader, but also to ensure a script can be broken down and scheduled properly.

IMO, when it comes to questions of standard formatting, you're better off sticking to what is the standard - it may be easier for you to understand, but when I as a DP receive a script that is written badly, or not formatted correctly it immediately makes me weary..

 

[FantasySciFi]

Just use the "intercut". The "intercut" technique is slowly becoming more common but is by no means 'standard'. If this is for your own production, it is a convenient method. Sticking with the standard slugline approach, while clunky, should meet approval with stricter readers.

The "intercut" technique was originally introduced to handle cutting back and forth between scenes of telephone calls and generalized out. It is 'standard' in that context and an example of it is used in a guide for preparing a script for the Nichols competition. It is also mentioned in several screenwriting guides.

The comments emphasize my point. If this is for your own work, you are free to make use of this newer technique. Many writer/directors have innovated new ways of writing which are becoming the new 'standard', among them the Coen Brothers, Tarantino, etc. However, not every professional reader is equally accepting, so you run a risk if submitting for outside consideration. Though something to bear in mind is Jax's comment.

Having the right sluglines IMO is essential, not just to avoid confusion from a reader, but also to ensure a script can be broken down and scheduled properly.

Most script software (Final Draft, CeltX, etc.) are designed to number and collate standard sluglines to create production slates/schedules. If you are using these productivity tools, staying with the standard sluglines automates that process. So from a production standpoint, using the standard sluglines makes it easier for the AD and other crew.

Good luck!

 

[harmonica44]

Having the right sluglines IMO is essential, not just to avoid confusion from a reader, but also to ensure a script can be broken down and scheduled properly.

IMO, when it comes to questions of standard formatting, you're better off sticking to what is the standard - it may be easier for you to understand, but when I as a DP receive a script that is written badly, or not formatted correctly it immediately makes me weary..

That's good to know. As the writer, I assume that the director would have already re-written the script into a shooting script for the DP, or alongside with the DP.