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Presence of Antagonist?

Christopher.Gros

Christopher.Gros

Hello to all,
first of all, love the site! I think this may be my first post on here, but I'm always here reading different threads. Very useful information!


My question is this:
I've written a script in which the antagonist is never completely seen; he's always partially shown and we always hear him talk (he narrates a good chunk of the story during his scenes), but we never see his face. It goes with his ideology that it doesn't really matter who is committing the crimes; that he's no one special, just an average person you'd see in a store, walking down the street, or at the bank.

Do you think this technique would be suspenseful to the audience or do you think they would get tired of it quickly and lose interest in him?
 
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I think you're on very dangerous and difficult ground here.

It could work... That's a could only... But it would take very very skilled writing and directing. And even then, it may not work well.

Voice overs can get very tiring for audiences... Some hate them...

Ronin (1998) had a mysterious package that was never revealed... But you're talking about the non-reveal of a central character - the antagonist.

Personally I would stick to showing your antagonist. He/she needs to be central to your story .
 
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I think I do, but then again, when looking at the concept as a whole I realize what a challenge it would be to pull off. The rough drafts of the script I've written I've passed on to several people who want to participate in the film and love the idea. Again, though, I'm writing it, not them. So yeah, I'm not 100% sure either haha.

I'd love to do it this way just to do something distinct, but only if I think I could pull it off. I guess I'll have to roll the idea around some more. I appreciate the feedback!
 
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Christopher.Gros said:
I'd love to do it this way just to do something distinct, but only if I think I could pull it off.
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Think of the worse thing that can happen if you jump in 100%
and write it to the best of your abilities...


I'm thinking the absolute worse thing that can happen is you can't
pull it off and you learn something about your abilities as a writer.
So you try something else. Or work on the rewrite and make it work.
 
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directorik said:
Think of the worse thing that can happen if you jump in 100%
and write it to the best of your abilities...

I'm thinking the absolute worse thing that can happen is you can't
pull it off and you learn something about your abilities as a writer.
So you try something else. Or work on the rewrite and make it work.
Click to expand...

Good advice ^
 
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Do you think this technique would be suspenseful to the audience or do you think they would get tired of it quickly and lose interest in him?
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It depends on your execution mostly. If it's well written, engaging, compelling and something that the audience can relate to and can root for the protagonist, then you should be ok.

The problem I see where you could have issues is the protagonist <-> Antagonist relationship. If you fail to have stakes high enough, which can happen if your story requires the antagonist and the audience doesn't get to know the antagonist, the audience can fail to really want to go on the journey with your hero. At that point, you've lost them.

But, yes you can. Just like every other piece of advice, just execute it well.
 
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So have you finished the script? If so posting it here would get you direct feedback w/e that technique works.

Otherwise, I would say unless you are really good, it would be hard to pull of. I mean, even traditional structure takes years and years to master.
 
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I have an early version of the script finished, but still needs to be re-written.. To be honest, looking over it for the first time in a couple of months, I see some of the silliness in it. I appreciate all the advice on here, and will be glad to PM it to anyone who wants it (just bear it mind, it's nowhere's near complete).
 
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If it is a good story with sharp dialogue, it could work. Any other, people might find it a snore fest. One idea is to make the camara his eyes and when he is seen. It is a shadow you see. Worked well with the 70's and 80's horror crowd. didn't even need Voice Over. Maybe could work.
 
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Mister X 101 said:
If it is a good story with sharp dialogue, it could work. Any other, people might find it a snore fest. One idea is to make the camara his eyes and when he is seen. It is a shadow you see. Worked well with the 70's and 80's horror crowd. didn't even need Voice Over. Maybe could work.
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I actually do have a couple of scenes like this haha. I thought it would be cool to see what he sees during his actions.

ChimpPhobiaFilms, I'll definitely shoot a message with it. Thanks!
 
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