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critique NUBARIUM - 1/2 Hour Animated TV Pilot (Would Love Feedback!)


Title: NUBARIUM
Format: Pilot
Length: 33 Pages
Genres: Dark Comedy, Sci-Fi, Action, Animation
Logline (Work in Progress): Low on cash, two potheads in a colonized territory seek help from a mystic radical, obsessed with getting revenge on neo-capitalism and its culprits. -Feedback Concerns: Did you laugh? Would you read more?

Note: Howdy! Just finished my first script. Trying to get it into script contest shape ASAP. Would love some feedback so any thoughts or advice would mean a ton. Thanks in advance.

Also quick background on NUBARIUM, started off as a project I was animating on my own, but quickly got too daunting to take on independently. More than happy to link some sketches of the characters and a trailer if anyone is interested! I plan on writing season 1 as partially episodic, sectioned off by a couple of serials— this pilot episode being Part 1 of the serial saga.
 
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