How's This For A Logline?

[Modern Day Myth Prod. LLC]

My script is now registered with the WGA East, by the way.

I, Creator 3 - The Singularity.

Logline:

In a war of ancient gods on a futuristic Amazon planet, a family of cyborgs with adopted human children are the chosen ones of the human goddess, Artemis to end a war between humans and cyborgs being fueled by the war god, Ares.

The Singularity end will be flushed out with with trans-cyborg characters in the script. A trans-cyborg is cyborg who was born human and transformed into a cyborg with technology after their original human bodies become broken beyond repair with organic means. And, with humans who have chip enhancements to make them more than human. They are simply augmented humans.

 

[Alcove Audio]

A bit wordy and confusing - maybe too much information?

Ancient gods on a futuristic planet? Sort of contradictory, and not really necessary descriptions.

Do the names of the gods really matter?

Does the types of planet (Amazon) really matter?


Whittle it down to it's core. "Human children who were adopted by cyborgs are chosen to end a war between humans and cyborgs."

I'm sure you can do better, but for me it always comes down to K.I.S.S. - Keep It Simple, Stupid.

 

[Modern Day Myth Prod. LLC]

Thanks Alcove, but the cyborgs are the stars, not the humans.

I am just showing the wide scope of characters in this pilot for a series with legs to be a long ongoing series.

 

[Modern Day Myth Prod. LLC]

How is this?



In a war of the gods, a family of cyborgs and humans are chosen by the goddess of creation to end a war between humans and cyborgs being fueled by the god of war.

 

[Alcove Audio]

the cyborgs are the stars, not the humans.

Your first logline made the adopted humans the stars.


A family of cyborgs and humans are chosen by the goddess of creation to end a conflict fueled by the god of war.

 

[Modern Day Myth Prod. LLC]

Since this is launching a series, the depth of the story needs to show like here.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6xR2CGfxfQY

By the way, the actress narrating this trailer and playing Artemis has been getting a lot of work from Microsoft for doing voice overs.

 

[Modern Day Myth Prod. LLC]

Your first logline made the adopted humans the stars.


A family of cyborgs and humans are chosen by the goddess of creation to end a conflict fueled by the god of war.

Nice!

I like!

Thanks Alcove!

 

[Firm1]

My script is now registered with the WGA East, by the way.

I, Creator 3 - The Singularity.

Logline:

In a war of ancient gods on a futuristic Amazon planet, a family of cyborgs with adopted human children are the chosen ones of the human goddess, Artemis to end a war between humans and cyborgs being fueled by the war god, Ares.

The Singularity end will be flushed out with with trans-cyborg characters in the script. A trans-cyborg is cyborg who was born human and transformed into a cyborg with technology after their original human bodies become broken beyond repair with organic means. And, with humans who have chip enhancements to make them more than human. They are simply augmented humans.

Oh wow. This sounds absolutely amazing. I'm so glad that other people are exploring these futurist genres. I'm also working on a screenplay myself that touches on issues related to the technological singularity. Can't wait to see what it looks like.

 

[Modern Day Myth Prod. LLC]

Thanks Firm1. That is a work in progress. We will do a script reading with as many cast members as possible this spring and I will have a script consultant go over it afterwards.

It is good enough now to make a budget with

 

[wheatgrinder]

uh oh, another one for the singularity.. must be time to start a support group!

 

[Modern Day Myth Prod. LLC]

Sounds like a plan.

 

[Modern Day Myth Prod. LLC]

My rep thinks the logline is too boring to catch attention. So, how is this?

A family of cyborgs and humans chosen by the goddess of creation work to unite their world in the face of a nuclear holocaust.

 

[THWriter]

I want to know how exactly a universe can take place in which there is both an ancient Goddess of creation and a race of sentient artificially intelligent machines. Usually belief in a benevolent creator stops when a civilization's science is so advanced it no longer feels the need to conjure up such divine imaginings. Is this goddess literal in this world? Is she powerful or does she not intervene at all? What are the rules set in place so that the story isn't plagued with Deus Ex Machinas? I know this is a logline thread but I'm curious. Indulge me.

Edit: Also, I honestly think using actual gods' names from mythology is a tad unimaginative... It's not hard to create your own.

 

[Modern Day Myth Prod. LLC]

The gods are names people know and public domain.

When you go commercial you will learn to be less "creative" and more like a studio exec who looks into pre-existing fan bases. That is important for rating on TV.

Welcome to the Einstein version of the Universe that has a god that is the single intelligent consciousness that is part of the Universe itself who can appear in many different manifestations to people everywhere.

When humans actually begin to create artificial life greater than those who made them, who can say who might come knocking on the door of those who would play god?

One of the best scenes in the first I, Creator was when the human general of the military on Earth before the nuclear war tried to get the cyborgs to kill a human terrorist and cyborg Angela Bruno reminds the general, "Thou shall not kill. Is it easier if we kill humans for you?"

That is a real moral question the military has to consider with AI.

 

[Modern Day Myth Prod. LLC]

The general never expected a machine to be so analytical.

 

[Modern Day Myth Prod. LLC]

To answer your other question, don't the cyborgs look surprised here, even for logical thinking machines with this encounter in space when Artemis appears to them? She even answers questions they have about humans and why humans made them the way they are,


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xb-y2i5FBJg

So, yes, The Goddess is an actual character in the series.

 

[Modern Day Myth Prod. LLC]

I highly recommend the biography book on Albert Einstein called, THE UNIVERSE AND DR. EINSTEIN. In the book, Dr. Einstein disagrees with most of his collegues who believe the Universe is of random creation. He believes there is a universal consciousness that exists everywhere that makes everything by design. He believes the Universe is just too perfect to be random.

The Universe and Dr. Einstein is a fascinating read with a fresh new look at the Universe by one of the greatest minds of science.

 

[Modern Day Myth Prod. LLC]

Another biography I read recently was on Dr. Robert Jastrow who wrote one of the best books ever for laymen on the Universe called, FROM RED GIANTS TO WHITE DWARFS. The story of our universe. He is a scientist who agrees with Einstein's view that the Universe is by design and not random.

 

[Modern Day Myth Prod. LLC]

And, since AI will be based on deciphering the human brain to create it artificially, I replaced Isaac Asimov's three laws of robotics with something more modern. Cyborgs have a conscious.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qccSxjcDM40

AI researcher and MIT co-founder, Marvin Minsky talks about the new model for AI here and its' possibilites of give machines a consciousness.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SNWVvZi3HX8

 

[Modern Day Myth Prod. LLC]

Okay! Back on topic.

Okay! Here is a new revision on the logline for I, Creator 3 - The Singularity

Families of cyborgs and humans are chosen by the goddess of creation to work together to unite their planet in the face of a nuclear holocaust.