How do I format a scene like this?

[harmonica44]

In my script a woman's bodyguard has to search her house to see if men who may want her dead, are inside. He has to search every room, before the scene can move on with the plot. Can I write it like this:

He searches every room in the house, with his hand on the grip of his gun, ready to draw...

Or do I have to write a scene heading for every time he enters a different room? Which looks more professional? Thanks.

 

[arrodiii]

Maybe this will help?

http://www.imsdb.com/scripts/Bodyguard.html

 

[Lucky Hardwood]

How about female and main body guard arrive at the house. Second body guard meets them at the door and says, "I just did a walk through and it's all good." First BG leaves female at the door and says, "I'll be sweeping the perimeter". Second BG is relieved and goes to do whatever and the first heads off to the side of the house, leaving her alone in the house. Or something like that.

 

[CHamburger]

Okay thanks, the series of shots sound good. But would that be in a spec script?

Yea you could put that in a spec. Its not the same as signaling specific camera angles or shots. You have one big scene location but a lot of action. If they film it, they'd probably do quick shots. Like I said you can also do different slug for each piece of new action, if that's more comfortable for you. You can set the setting ex. EXT-Downtown-Day
description of what's happening overall.

then..

SERIES OF SHOTS

1)....
2)....

After your action sequence relaxes

BACK TO SCENE

or..

NEW SLUG

 

[harmonica44]

Yea you could put that in a spec. Its not the same as signaling specific camera angles or shots. You have one big scene location but a lot of action. If they film it, they'd probably do quick shots. Like I said you can also do different slug for each piece of new action, if that's more comfortable for you. You can set the setting ex. EXT-Downtown-Day
description of what's happening overall.

then..

SERIES OF SHOTS

1)....
2)....

After your action sequence relaxes

BACK TO SCENE

or..

NEW SLUG

I could do that, but I was told on here before that sluglines are more for shooting scripts, and it will look like I am the director if I write it in a spec. Even though I plan to direct it myself, I still want to write it as a spec to present to people first. Plus that way the page length will be shorter for a newbie, which I heard is good too, if that's correct.

How about female and main body guard arrive at the house. Second body guard meets them at the door and says, "I just did a walk through and it's all good." First BG leaves female at the door and says, "I'll be sweeping the perimeter". Second BG is relieved and goes to do whatever and the first heads off to the side of the house, leaving her alone in the house. Or something like that.

I can't use that because I can only have one bodyguard. The reason being since it's very low budget, I want it with as few actors, as possible, plus it makes it more exciting for when the killers come, the one bodyguard is forced to do everything himself.

That's not what I said to do. I'm sure you can come up with some creative solution as opposed to having the bodyguard search an entire house.

Again, I'm sure you can find another solution to establishing her home.

How will it cause more confusion?

I think it will cause more confusion because the audience will be wondering why they are wondering around a house, not knowing who's, with her left alone, since there are killers possibly after her, at least that's how I see it. Like my scene is when they come in the door, the bodyguard says to her, 'stay behind me while I search the house'. She does while her searches with his gun ready. Just a quick series of shots. Then after the house is empty, he says 'we can't stay long, go back some clothes quick, and we'll go'. Or something like that.

This establishes that it is her house, and that she is just there quick to pack clothes and leave for somewhere safe. When he leaves her alone to pack and change, she does something behind his back that is crucial to the plot. It is also important that she does this thing at her house, and no other place, so I need a reason to go her house to, which I have.

So how do I establish where they are and why, and that he can leave her alone, cause they know the place is empty, if I just have the scene start, with her already packing, and him leaving her alone, without the audience being confused, as to how this scenario started without asking those questions?

 

[TheNoob]

I think it will cause more confusion because the audience will be wondering why they are wondering around a house, not knowing who's, with her left alone, since there are killers possibly after her, at least that's how I see it.

I still don't quite understand how not searching an entire house will cause confusion. And I don't mean to sound rude, but you keep saying, that I'm telling you to start the scene with the bodyguard leaving. I have not given you any creative solutions to your scene other than advice on actors and audience.

Like my scene is when they come in the door, the bodyguard says to her, 'stay behind me while I search the house'. She does while her searches with his gun ready. Just a quick series of shots. Then after the house is empty, he says 'we can't stay long, go back some clothes quick, and we'll go'. Or something like that.

You can have him search the whole house if you want, but I see it as pointless in your scene and a few other people agree. It's up to you, there's no set rules, but I wouldn't recommend doing it.

This establishes that it is her house, and that she is just there quick to pack clothes and leave for somewhere safe. When he leaves her alone to pack and change, she does something behind his back that is crucial to the plot. It is also important that she does this thing at her house, and no other place, so I need a reason to go her house to, which I have.

So how do I establish where they are and why, and that he can leave her alone, cause they know the place is empty, if I just have the scene start, with her already packing, and him leaving her alone, without the audience being confused, as to how this scenario started without asking those questions?

Sorry, but again, I never said to just start the scene like that, and I never gave advice on making any scene. I just said, "But remember the audience tend to form assumptions based on the actors actions. You could use that to your advantage. Example: Actors don't show suspicion, so the audience isn't suspicious."

It seems to me that you're having trouble establishing her home, and there purpose at the house. So you make him search her entire house << this is said from a perspective that searching the entire house is unnecessary.

 

[Lucky Hardwood]

I can't use that because I can only have one bodyguard. The reason being since it's very low budget, I want it with as few actors, as possible, plus it makes it more exciting for when the killers come, the one bodyguard is forced to do everything himself.

I don't know who much time your film covers but, if it is more than half a day, you realistically should have more than one body guard because they don't work 24 hours a day as a general rule. For the second guard, you would need one additional person for five or six seconds of screen time and one or two lines of dialog. Just about anybody could pul off that roll.

 

[harmonica44]

I don't know who much time your film covers but, if it is more than half a day, you realistically should have more than one body guard because they don't work 24 hours a day as a general rule. For the second guard, you would need one additional person for five or six seconds of screen time and one or two lines of dialog. Just about anybody could pul off that roll.

I can only have one guard for the plot as well. The woman is secretly a villain and needs to catch her guard by surprise, take him hostage, and force him do some things as part of her plan. She cannot capture two or three guards and force them to do it, because only one man can know what's going on, and there can be no other witnesses.

She can kill the other guard, but than everyone associated with the case will wonder what happened to that guard, and I can't have any characters think anything suspicious of her, cause of a missing person. So only one guard will work for the plot at hand. And the whole script is not the guard protecting her. The section of the plot takes place just on his shift.

I still don't quite understand how not searching an entire house will cause confusion. And I don't mean to sound rude, but you keep saying, that I'm telling you to start the scene with the bodyguard leaving. I have not given you any creative solutions to your scene other than advice on actors and audience.

You can have him search the whole house if you want, but I see it as pointless in your scene and a few other people agree. It's up to you, there's no set rules, but I wouldn't recommend doing it.



Sorry, but again, I never said to just start the scene like that, and I never gave advice on making any scene. I just said, "But remember the audience tend to form assumptions based on the actors actions. You could use that to your advantage. Example: Actors don't show suspicion, so the audience isn't suspicious."

It seems to me that you're having trouble establishing her home, and there purpose at the house. So you make him search her entire house << this is said from a perspective that searching the entire house is unnecessary.

Okay well if the audience will still get that she came there to pack some clothes, and that they just got there and have to leave soon, and that it's already been just searched, then I can start the scene another way, or write it different maybe.

 

[TheNoob]

I can only have one guard for the plot as well. The woman is secretly a villain and needs to catch her guard by surprise, take him hostage, and force him do some things as part of her plan. She cannot capture two or three guards and force them to do it, because only one man can know what's going on, and there can be no other witnesses.

She can kill the other guard, but than everyone associated with the case will wonder what happened to that guard, and I can't have any characters think anything suspicious of her, cause of a missing person. So only one guard will work for the plot at hand. And the whole script is not the guard protecting her. The section of the plot takes place just on his shift.



Okay well if the audience will still get that she came there to pack some clothes, and that they just got there and have to leave soon, and that it's already been just searched, then I can start the scene another way, or write it different maybe.

Ignore everything I said, just film the scene the way you want.

 

[harmonica44]

No I will take your advice and change it, I'm just not sure how to convey it otherwise or start out the scene so it makes sense. I'll keep thinking. Thanks for the input, I'll change once it comes to me how. I know what you mean, I too had doubts about the set up of the scene, and only went with it, so far, cause I couldn't think of a better set up, so far.