I came up with an idea to make a short film about a college girl who gets out of class at night and as she's walking to her car she notices someone is following her and attempts to kill her. The scene would be about 3-4 minutes long I have no budget but only 3 cams and a Campus for the scene. Does this scene I'm contemplating on writing seem to vague and just boring or should i add more depth to it...Ive never actually wrote a script just always behind the camera and opinions on how to make this Film a better one id greatly appreciate it
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Horror Short Film (Opinions)
- Thread starter sinister0101
- Start date
It's fine idea but as you described it, it's not telling a story. Even shorts must have some story to them. So what you want to focus on is providing an ending which explains why this is happening. It's okay to start with a sequence that seems to come out of nowhere--the killer stalks and attacks. The middle, if you will, she's evading and fighting back. But you need a solid ending. She rips off the ski mask and sees it's her boyfriend/roommate/professor/etc. If s/he's dying, you need some explanation as to why. The images are one part of the story. The emotional motivation is the other. You need to resolve that for the audience to feel satisfaction.
You may have that in mind, but that's key for it being a satisfying short.
You may have that in mind, but that's key for it being a satisfying short.
Thank you , you just put a whole another vision into perspective for me.
As she's going to her car a guy comes up and tries to killer her, he chases her over campus and eventually gets here she attempts to fight back and comes to realize its the Deranged ex boyfriend who couldn't get over here. She manages to get away and call the cops, but when the cops arrive the body is gone.
You went for the easiest possible story. You need to think beyond the simplest form and actually come up with something that the audience will be happy to have seen...
Here's a quick example, it took me less than 3minutes to come up with it:
Female student being stalked by someone after a late night class.
She keeps looking over her shoulder while walking to her dorm.
The dark-hooded figure approaches at a fast pace.
She runs, he chases after.
He catches up to her, they struggle.
She realizes it's one of her professors.
He starts strangling her, she is asking why.
He tells her he mistakenly let her use a flashdrive that contained incriminating info.
She says she never opened the files.
He doesnt believe her and kills her.
He checks her purse/bag/pants only to find the flashdrive she has is not the one he is looking for.
Someone else has the other one.
Ateast this story, as simple as it may be, its actually more intriguing than an ex still pissed that she left. I'm not saying it is a knockout but a bit more challenging to come up with, which the audience will appreciate.
You can use it, just credit me as a writer
Joey
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You went for the easiest possible story. You need to think beyond the simplest form and actually come up with something that the audience will be happy to have seen...
Here's a quick example, it took me less than 3minutes to come up with it:
Female student being stalked by someone after a late night class.
She keeps looking over her shoulder while walking to her dorm.
The dark-hooded figure approaches at a fast pace.
She runs, he chases after.
He catches up to her, they struggle.
She realizes it's one of her professors.
He starts strangling her, she is asking why.
He tells her he mistakenly let her use a flashdrive that contained incriminating info.
She says she never opened the files.
He doesnt believe her and kills her.
He checks her purse/bag/pants only to find the flashdrive she has is not the one he is looking for.
Someone else has the other one.
You can use it, just credit me as a writer
Joey
Thanks,
I will credit you and thank you for taking time to throw one together for me
Ateast this story, as simple as it may be, its actually more intriguing than an ex still pissed that she left. I'm not saying it is a knockout but a bit more challenging to come up with, which the audience will appreciate.