Review Notes
Quick note: Knightly chose to critique based on four categories; visuals, audio, creepiness, and story. I am not really much of an audio guy, so I am going to leave that critique to Knightly. Instead, I’d rather critique on performance, so I’ll swap in that category instead of audio.
The Pumpkin Carver
Initial Reaction - This is what makes quick turnaround competitions so much fun. You told a fantastic story in just over a minute. The use of a copyright song (presumably without permission) might rankle some feathers. Personally I'm not concerned with it, but I think you might have been able to accomplish the same whimsical mood with some other original music. Not to take away from the Pina Colada song - it really did accomplish what you were going for. I don't know that I have anything really negative to say about this movie. For a micro-film, this is very satisfying.
Visuals (4 of 5) - The editing was tight and effective. I liked the visual shifts going into and out of the carving sequence, when the light seemed brighter and warmer. The FX of the two heads was also a nice comedic touch.
Performance (4 of 5) – There was a definite ‘camp’ feel at play here, and it worked well in the context of the joke. The male carver played it just right, with the perfect amount of disarming innocent charm. Best of all, though; I felt like I could see just the slightest smirk of satisfaction on your heroine’s face during the ending sequence (who IS that sassy lady?!?) The closing expression was priceless.
Creepiness (2 of 5) – Not much at work here for the creepiness factor. In truth, the story elements could be twisted into a very creepy story. Meeting someone on Craig’s List, inviting them over, a disarming man who suddenly reveals his true colors, a woman who suddenly reveals she has darker colors – this could be the basis for an American Psycho sequel. But you managed to find the humor in the absurdity of it, and because of that, I think your story is far more enjoyable.
Story (8 of 10) – The male carving joke was quite unexpected, and therefore worked well. The sudden unexpected shifts in tone reinforce the comedy. As I said above, you packed a great punch into a lean 1:15. This was well done.
LeMort
Initial Reaction – I'm assuming you have access to a local haunted house attraction, which was a brilliant way to add some production value to this quick short. Overall, I think you handled everything quite nicely, especially given the quick turnaround I enjoyed the music and thought it was a good choice for this movie. It fit the mood well.
Visuals (4 of 5) – The lighting during the opening sequence of prepping the guns seemed a little bright. A darker, moodier lighting might have helped set a more sinister tone to the piece. By comparison, the haunted house sequences were excellent. Better mood lighting, great use of the set pieces and set design.
Performance (2 of 5) – Most of the haunted house actors seemed to react essentially the same way upon seeing the killer with the gun -- "No! Don't shoot!" A little more variety in the reactions would have kept it from sounding so repetitive. However, I thought the haunted house performances were quite effective while in their ‘scare’ attraction mode.
Creepiness (4 of 5)– The haunted house visuals and scary characters within come together to form a decent creepy factor. Also, the opening sequence with the guns adds a sense of creepy danger. The momentum was bit lost by the repetitiveness of the killings and the lack of any detail.
Story (5 of 10)– The movie seemed to find its gear when the haunted house sequence started. I feel that was the most engaging part. Better set design, lighting, atmosphere, etc. I would have preferred a little less gun-prep footage and a little more haunted house footage. The blood on the hands was a nice ending touch. Interesting basis for a short movie!
Devil's Knight
Initial Reaction – Although Knightly didn’t specifically state it, the implied intent of this competition was to get people to create a new short film (under 10 minutes) in a limited amount of time. This film exceeds the recommended time limit AND it appears to be one that was developed over a longer period of time…I’m guessing it was already shot before the contest was announced (uploaded to Vimeo and YouTube on 10/26). Therefore, I feel it is only fair to view this one more critically than the others.
Visuals (3 of 5)– This movie looked like it was made to show off someone's developing digital FX skills. Some of the FX worked reasonably well. Others were less effective in that they were obvious post-production add-ins. Regarding the knight; the costume was a good quality. Very effective. Lighting was inconsistent. Specific issues were the odd filtering during the cop confrontation scene at the beginning, and the final battle had some segments that were too dark and the blue tint in the barn was too strong for my taste. The Angel Ascent sequence looked great. Your FX artist has a good handle overall on how things work. Some continued practice will help get those FX blended a little better into the scene so they don’t stand out quite as much.
Performance (2 of 5)– I thought Angel was the strongest performer of the group. I was not a fan of the cop at the beginning, though I think his performance might have been more to do with the dialogue which sounded like it was lifted right out of an 80s muscle action flick (eg: “Guess what, I’ve got your boarding pass!”).
Creepiness (3 of 5)– This, to me, is more of an action movie, albeit with underlying good vs. evil themes. Granted, the Knight is an evil character, but I didn’t feel unsettled by it. However, there were many effective scenes for setting the evil tone. Like Knightly, I thought one of the better sequences was when the cop crawls out of the barn and the Knight steps out over him.
Story (7 of 10)– I can appreciate the grandeur and scope of the story you are trying to tell here, but I feel like some story pieces are missing that would really help me get more involved and invested in the outcome.
The Scream of the Screaming Screamer
Initial viewing - Fantastic short. I love a good laugh, and this one had me laughing out loud. Seriously. Sorry if my notes below seem sparse compared to the others. I suppose it is because everything worked so well for me, I just want to smile and enjoy it!
Visuals (4 of 5) - The use black & white was a nice touch. Angles were well thought out. Lighting was generally solid throughout. Only drawback for me was that some of the shots seemed a little underlit.
Performance (5 of 5) - You would not have been able to pull this off with an average actor. Your lead did a fantastic job selling both the panic and the humor at the same time. She had me at "Jeez Lousie!" Well done. Best performance of the competition.
Creepiness (3 of 5) - Although this was clearly comedy (for me, anyway!), you managed a decent level of anxiety and anticipation throughout. Complemented by the effective angles, cuts, and framing mentioned in the Visuals section.
Story (8 of 10) - Brilliant.
Destroyer
This movie made it difficult for me to breathe. My eyes watered. You are a brave man, Ray. I understand how this experience must have drained you. If I were judging solely on emotional impact, this would be the hands-down winner.
Visuals (5 of 5) - From the start, this picture just felt dirty. The camera was a depraved voyeur seeking depraved thrills, courtesy of the Destroyer. Even though there were some excellently framed shots, they always came across like a happy accident, as if captured by someone documenting a real-life horrific scene. This is the most powerful assault (on the viewer) I've seen in years.
Performance (2 of 5) - I scored this a little lower only because there wasn't much of a performance to feature in this movie. Not to take away from the actor, he did a fine job. To be fair to others in the competition, there were other performances that were more singularly impressive.
Creepiness (5 of 5) - I don't really need to explain this. You know what you've done.
Story (8 of 10) - One of the features I was looking for in the story evaluation was originality. Unfortunately, as your ending statistics indicate ... this story is sadly not a creative original one. What you DID manage to do, though, is deliver it with a powerful punch. And the use of the doll as a symbolic surrogate was (for me) a fresh, original spin on an old sad tale.
Now I need to go hug my children.
