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Excellent visual composition and pace. Very good. Pulled me in as a viewer right from the opening shot. Dialogue was off. Don't say it if you can show it. Too many words. In a few places, actors looked like they were waiting for their cue, to speak their lines and not in an actual...

I was going to put this up but looks like I got beat by rayw ...documentary movie made from books taken from wiki... My point above is write it out on paper so you know where you want to go with your docu... Cover your butt and make it the best you can with a clear direction.

Put it down on paper first. Script (copyright it if you can) or create an outline to work from. Break it down for adding new thoughts. Make it clean and exact in your head -- what you want to do. Then shoot it. You can copyright a script BUT not an idea.

Mixed bag of comments with examples Good luck...

Many of us have used and/or are still on AmazonStudios. My 2 cents... I joined almost a year ago with mixed results. Some history WITH EXAMPLES: One script got 23 reads and a 4.5 out of 5 star ratings (only two reviews). One of the reviewers, (you must swap scripts on Amazon to get read)...

Got the trailer down to a couple frames over 30 seconds. Comments, suggestions or creative ideas? All are welcomed. Click Here!

Okay, took 8 minutes to download and view. Beautiful images and composition. Slow but effective pace. Like PaulGriffith above, have no idea what the movie is about. Not sure I would pay to see at theater based upon substance (built on paranoia). But. A little pinch of something to add suspense...

Tried to view. With no luck. Unable to down load it or open it up to view. Will try again later... only mention it cause many on these boards will give it a view and give you honest comments -- if they can get to it. You are in the right place for that.

All of these comments are fantastic! Okay. Surface some facts from my side. Having never done Kickstarter before, I knew in advance that there was much I needed to learn. Good, bad and ugly. I learn from doing, unfortunately I am stuck with the camera(s) I have and not those I dream about...

Thanks 2001, Ernest & Flicker. Great comments and suggestions. I have a hard time thinking out of the box sometimes. I am taking notes. Please feel free to take the trailer/cast commentary/pledge gifts, 4:30 video apart. Maybe if I work backwards with footage and try some different music...

Thanks IndieBudget. But if you could get critical, if you were to change anything or several things -- what would they be? Graphics? Lettering? Voice over? Pace? Camera work? Quality of audio or image? Trying to learn with everything I do. I know somewhere in that 4:28 clip, there are...

rayw. Okay. Once again, I stand corrected. Story is not just the words on a page; IT is the presentation of those words on the screen! Let me try to put it this way, Princess didn't follow the "correct-by-ERB's" story (must of been rolling in his grave) -- The Princess rip-off, had John...

I have visited, watched, swapped, commented, read the work of others over the past decade (that I have been on Indietalk). Yeah, I do not create many new threads or write on a lot of threads, (I do through E-mail and private mail -- cause their are so many great minds on this site and I like to...

I tried watching that 2009 Princess of Mars... TRIED. Really bad. Couldn't get past the first twenty minutes. Comparing Princess with John Carter is like comparing a Lamborghini and a tricycle -- they both have wheels! I cannot think of anything in the Sabato/Lords 'epic' that was positive...

AND here is what they say on Yahoo Movie Reviews Amazon was from a 'book' perspective -- Yahoo from the movie perspective...

Went to see John Carter twice. Both 3D. Went solo at opening Sat. then again to smaller screen with wife and friends. Everyone gave it a B+ or an A. Wife and I had read the books (I as a child/young adult -- passed them on to wife to read 30 years ago). Why we gave the film an A. The movie did a...

I'll check it out after a little sleep. Been working on projects too. 5 A.M. Like what I saw...

A fishing series? Good title with an open door -- need to see the poster or logline.

Great idea. Good luck to all. You should keep a thread alive on IndieTalk and let us not participating -- know it went for all that submitted to the challenge. After 6 years of exclusively writing, as a writer -- I'm done writing. Think I'll start taking scripts to screen for the next few...

Even Rope, Hitchcock's viewer challenging movie about strangling and a trunk (1948) -- got old, very quick. I want to see as much as possible on the screen. Pace me. Movies are like music. Give me that visual (and audio) rhythm. From CU to DS -- movies are about image (and audio). LOL. Want to...