archived-videos Roselyn- Short Film

I have to say that although I thought the directing was very good, the story just didn't really keep me interested, just found it to slow, but that's just me.
 
Why does he look so sad, while eating a Hot Pocket? They're so delicious!

Does he really sleep with his socks on?

Oh, fuck, 4.5 minutes have passed, and NOTHING has happened. Yes, this is a tad sloooooow.

You know what he should do? He should splash some water on his face, and then stare at himself in the mirror. That might cheer him up. Oh, no, still didn't work, for the third time. Maybe he should go for a walk?

Oh, now we're walking. And, we're walking. Annnnd, walking some more. Aaaaannnnnd, we're still walking.

Oh, shit! There's a girl! Something might happen! And it only took six minutes to get there.

These are the things that go through your audience's brain, when you take so damn long for a setup. Move it along. Get us going faster.

I really like your shot-selection. I feel like you have a very good eye for where to put the camera, and what to do with it. Pacing is my only complaint.

Hope I wasn't too negative. This is nice work. Best of luck.
 
Got to agree with some flaws in the screenplay. Definately too slow for a short. But, again, incredible camera work. Care to share the details on what you shot with, techniques etc. ? If you dont wish to talk about it publicly, please PM me as I'd love to get that kind of ambiance.
 
Cracker Funk said:
Why does he look so sad, while eating a Hot Pocket? They're so delicious!

Does he really sleep with his socks on?

Oh, fuck, 4.5 minutes have passed, and NOTHING has happened. Yes, this is a tad sloooooow.

You know what he should do? He should splash some water on his face, and then stare at himself in the mirror. That might cheer him up. Oh, no, still didn't work, for the third time. Maybe he should go for a walk?

Oh, now we're walking. And, we're walking. Annnnd, walking some more. Aaaaannnnnd, we're still walking.

Oh, shit! There's a girl! Something might happen! And it only took six minutes to get there.

These are the things that go through your audience's brain, when you take so damn long for a setup. Move it along. Get us going faster.

I really like your shot-selection. I feel like you have a very good eye for where to put the camera, and what to do with it. Pacing is my only complaint.

Hope I wasn't too negative. This is nice work. Best of luck.
Click to expand...

You make me want to not watch videos. :) But seriously. It saves me the time...................See!?!?! This is what happens!!
 
Murdock said:
You make me want to not watch videos. :) But seriously. It saves me the time...................See!?!?! This is what happens!!
Click to expand...

I was totally grumpy the other night. Probably shouldn't have been watching videos. Hope I wasn't too negative. There's some good stuff in here for the OP to expand on.
 
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