archived-videos Will o' the Wisp

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This is a three part series I did. Let me know what you think.

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=<object width="640" height="385"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/wfVPv8EOfx8&hl=en_US&fs=1&"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/wfVPv8EOfx8&hl=en_US&fs=1&" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="640" height="385"></embed></object>
 
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Part I

I liked it. Some of the mistakes I'm going to say I feel you could also get away with because of the type of piece it is. So take it for what it's worth.

@ .29 into .33 and same with .53 into .56, you kept the camera at the same angle when making those cuts. They need to move at least 20 degrees or it's a jump cut. Now since this is particular type of piece (maybe experimental), I didn't mind it so much. But this is the Narrative section and since you placed it here, not me, I will ding you on this. Also, it would have looked better in my opinion if you chose to move the camera (maybe even circling her with the camera). But, this type of concept, I feel not moving the camera as such (20 degrees) is not that big of a deal and can be fine. Also, just an idea, during those times you had props which you never did a close up to emphasize them. And at both of those times you could have cut to a close up of the props and continued to use those same shots. She struggling with the blind fold and the glass being raised to her lips (which showing it at her lips would have made it sexier and also, she screams throughout hence the close up on the lips).

Jury is still out about the narrative voice. I like the mono tone but maybe if he had a whispering style mixed with mono would have captured me more (and the title being - Will o' the WISP). I mean, you pumped up the volume anyway, why not add another dimension to it? But it was fine with what you have done. Music was creepy and good. With volumes pumped up it enhanced the audience's uncomfortable feelings worked for me.

I like what you did with the lighting at the beginning half. It reminds me of when I was listening to what Steven Jones and what he said they did in The Borrower. They needed to film inside of a space ship but didn't have the budget so they had placed the alien in an all bright, white space and the alien stood in front of a simple console in the middle frame. It was effective for them and it was effective for you folks too.

As for outside at the bridge, it was not bad but I couldn't see her face that well during the long shots. I would have liked to because I'm a guy and I want to voyeur at a hot lady. Also, it would have enhanced her too as an actress. A bounce card would have been tricky or someone holding a light above the camera (long extension cord with a generator might have worked). But I'm sure there is some way you could have done it on a bridge. But I will say this, besides not highlighting her (which she should be pissed about because it's your film showing her talent and looks off) it does do a contrast from the previous location in which she was under high contrast light. Now this is the narrative section so again, I will ding you.

Beyond that, so far it's an interesting concept and I will watch the others in the future and respond.
 
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Wow! That was very informative criticism. Thank you for taking the time to do that. Unfortunately I will not be making anymore episodes of this because the main girl moved to New York and the guy is MIA. This was my first real project I ever did with actors. Thank you again.
 
Part II

Still liking it. I would still say the moving of the camera 20 degrees would have been better but what you did works in this film. Footage was fine and I like all the effects. When they are speaking after running I didn't care for the continuity of your actor's actions. Her hands/arms would be up in one shot, then you would continue the conversation with a cut and her hands would be down and she's not moving around (or something to that effect). But a director would have another set of eyes on the set to make sure those things don't happen and I'm guessing you didn't have that.

Sounds are still good and glad you are mixing it up.

I'm glad I took a third look at it because I didn't notice the guy was sitting next to her at the very beginning while she said, "I thought I would never see you again". Some more light could have help that. I thought she was on a cell phone.

Excellent transition where you did a blur from the male character to the female character on the bridge.

But in all another nice installment all around. I'll review the last one in the future.

Sorry to hear you can't continue with your project, I think they all did a good job acting. But just think of bigger and brighter things. ; ) What was the camera you used? It did get blurry in some areas when you were doing the running/chase scene. It wasn't a problem with this shoot and infact,it enhanced the shot.
 
Part III -

Pill scene seemed to go on too long but I understand you had narration during this entire time. Wish you could have captured something with addition to the pill scene during this time. Maybe something with the camera so you foreshadowed its importance later. No pills in the when drinking the glass which was obvious so a continuity ding.

Bad lighting @ 1:36 -> 2:23. I would have liked to see what was going on. Great blood effects.

I like the reverse effects. I don't mind the darkness of the lighting at times but highlighting the face would have help this one more.

Story started to come together by this point, to some degree and it would have been interesting to see how it panned out.

Good luck on future work and keep it up. I like the unique attempt and taking risks which is rare in a lot of films.
 
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The thing for me with experimental, is just that, it's experimental, so it's really hard to "review" (at least for me).

Was there a particular theme you were going for in experimenting? In the first I really liked the whole "whispering", which I liked-being blindfolding and hearing the voices,ect.

Admittedly I turn down the volume a bit ;) But that might be my old ears.

I don't know if there's much more I can add to the already detailed review before mine :).

I too am intrigued by what you have coming up in future :)
 
You know I did that two years ago so honestly I can't really tell you what I was trying to do with this. Ha Ha. I was trying to get something out there. It was rushed and unrehearsed but it was one of my first projects so I learned a lot from all the mistakes I made. I have a bunch of stuff in the works right now but if you're interested in my work I would suggest you follow me on YouTube.

http://www.youtube.com/user/ryanpatrick1984

Thank you :)
 
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