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critique "We Real Cool" 2 Page Short Script - feedback requested

Link: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1VrdSW41uI_-3URLIz9CChwz9EgQ9cDfE5zKPFfXLYos/edit?usp=sharing

This is a short script I'd like to shoot some day.

It's about the collision of two completely different lives.

Any feedback or critique would be much appreciated.

Thanks!

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