archived-videos TWO EVILS - A Found Footage Short Film (looking for criticism)

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Hello, everyone. I am a high school student and wanted some feedback on the first real short film I've made. I know the 'found footage' idea is a bit overused, but I wanted to come up with a more unique and practical approach to it. It's two minutes long.

If you decide to watch it, feel free to give me honest criticism!
Thanks!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LWCNt8DffOU
 
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For a first effort it's good. It did seem though that the actress was looking at lines but I could be wrong there.

I liked the twist. I think an alternate ending could be that he fails in getting the code for the alarm when she disconnects, and then reveal that the gunmen have him at gunpoint. In this way, it would end on an even more dire note.

But overall it was good, and being short was wise. Keep at it!
 
PhantomScreenwriter said:
For a first effort it's good. It did seem though that the actress was looking at lines but I could be wrong there.

I liked the twist. I think an alternate ending could be that he fails in getting the code for the alarm when she disconnects, and then reveal that the gunmen have him at gunpoint. In this way, it would end on an even more dire note.

But overall it was good, and being short was wise. Keep at it!
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Thanks a lot for watching! I appreciate the encouragement and the suggestions.
Interesting idea for another version of the ending.

And yes, the actress looked down once or twice in the beginning. After finishing the video, I realize now that it could be distracting. I probably should have used another take. :P

Thanks!
 
That was good! Wasn't frightening and I didn't feel the suspense but these are elements to work on. To be frank, I have no idea how to make something frightening or suspenseful myself!
 
gorillaonabike said:
That was good! Wasn't frightening and I didn't feel the suspense but these are elements to work on. To be frank, I have no idea how to make something frightening or suspenseful myself!
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Well, I'll definitely keep working on it! Thanks for watching and commenting.
 
Firstly well done on the video (I enjoyed it!)

I liked the web chat camera switch (It felt very much like a shot reverse shot, which I'm assuming you were aiming for - So well done!)

Personally I think a backing track would have helped build up thee tone, especially towards the end (Even if you brought it in as she heard the footsteps), and you could play on horror genre conventions using a canted angle on the wider shot, as well a covering the villains faces with balaclavas? Then you could have done a really cool perspective shot with the antagonist reveal where you switch the focus from the gun (Up close) to the antagonists face, then established the second antagonist in the wide shot. It was well made though :)
 
GrumpyHoboFilms said:
Firstly well done on the video (I enjoyed it!)

I liked the web chat camera switch (It felt very much like a shot reverse shot, which I'm assuming you were aiming for - So well done!)

Personally I think a backing track would have helped build up thee tone, especially towards the end (Even if you brought it in as she heard the footsteps), and you could play on horror genre conventions using a canted angle on the wider shot, as well a covering the villains faces with balaclavas? Then you could have done a really cool perspective shot with the antagonist reveal where you switch the focus from the gun (Up close) to the antagonists face, then established the second antagonist in the wide shot. It was well made though :)
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Thanks, man, I really appreciate it!

I was a little hesitant to add a backing track, because I wanted to make sure it still felt like a found footage film. That being said, I definitely do agree that it would have helped build the tone.
And I love your idea for the antagonist reveal! I wish I would have thought of that myself! :lol:

Thanks a lot for the suggestions. They are very helpful!
 
I really enjoyed this! Honestly wasn't expecting the ending. It's your film and your project, but I wouldn't call this a "found footage" film. When I see "found footage," I think of the horror sub-genre and films like Cloverfield, The Blair Witch Project, Paranormal Activity, etc. Again though, I like it. Well done. Didn't occur to me that the actress could be looking at her lines, and if she was, it works because it plays as if she's looking down because she feels uncomfortable.

Edit: I think it works as a first installment, but I agree with PhantomScreenwriter's comments about the ending if this is intended to stand on its own.
 
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Awesome video. The acting is pretty solid, the pacing was good, editing felt on point. I think you got some good pointers of creating suspense towards the end. Keep it up!
 
InsanelyyBored said:
I really enjoyed this! Honestly wasn't expecting the ending. It's your film and your project, but I wouldn't call this a "found footage" film. When I see "found footage," I think of the horror sub-genre and films like Cloverfield, The Blair Witch Project, Paranormal Activity, etc. Again though, I like it. Well done. Didn't occur to me that the actress could be looking at her lines, and if she was, it works because it plays as if she's looking down because she feels uncomfortable.

Edit: I think it works as a first installment, but I agree with PhantomScreenwriter's comments about the ending if this is intended to stand on its own.
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Thank you! Glad to hear that the ending was a bit of a surprise.

I agree that this isn’t what you would expect for something called “found footage”. It was actually made for a contest, and the requirement was that it had to be a found footage film, so that’s why I used the term. I might change it, now that the contest is over, to avoid confusion.

It is intended to stand on its own, and I can definitely see how the alternative ending would have added a little more gravity to the ending.

Thanks a lot for the comments! :)
 
ProfAnonymous said:
Awesome video. The acting is pretty solid, the pacing was good, editing felt on point. I think you got some good pointers of creating suspense towards the end. Keep it up!
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Than you very much! Yeah, I'll definitely keep those pointers in mind next time. Thanks for watching.
 
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