The start of a short

[Semiazas]

I figured I'd attempt to start writing a short now, through the art of improvisation, which I have never done with a script before, having never written anything.
The basic premise is a psychologist talking to a serial killer on death row. I don't know where to take it in terms of an ending yet though.

The setting is an interior, all in one room, a prison cell.
The characters have no names yet so they will be KILLER and PSYCHOLOGIST (I use caps as I got into a habit of doing it after reading play scripts)

The format won't be right, of course, it'll be a bit more like a play script.

PSYCHOLOGIST enters the cell. KILLER is sat across from him, bound to his chair. A table separates the two of them, with a chair for PSYCHOLOGIST

KILLER : Why have they sent you?

PSYCHOLOGIST : Your death sentence has finally caught up with you. You'll be walking the last mile a week from today.

KILLER (no emotion in his face or voice) : Why have they sent a psychologist?

PSYCHOLOGIST : They want me to analyse what you're going through, psychologically, now that you know you're going to die.

KILLER : I always knew I was going to die. It was just a matter of when. (pause) Why do you want to get inside my mind then?

PSYCHOLOGIST : To see what it's like being you knowing the end is finally on the horizon.

KILLER : You want to know what it's like to be me? I could tell you a thing or two about being like me.. (smiles)

Just a short improvised passage to maybe get the idea going.
What d'you think?

 

[VPTurner]

Have you seen Silence of the Lambs? The best dialogue says very little out loud, but has profound meaning.

 

[Semiazas]

I've seen it (and read the book) and seen Red Dragon too.
I'm just wondering how to kind of... Drive it forward, and also what to do for an ending.

 

[VPTurner]

I've seen it (and read the book) and seen Red Dragon too.
I'm just wondering how to kind of... Drive it forward, and also what to do for an ending.

Depends on what you're trying to accomplish here. What does each character want? Clearly your psychologist was instructed to interview him, but does he want to? Does he care? What does he hope to achieve? Same with the killer. What does he want? What does he hope to achieve? Why should he even bother to talk to this guy?

Establish motivation, establish wants and needs, contrast those wants and needs (give obstacles) and your story will write itself.

Although there isn't much room for action in your setting. It has the potential to turn into a boring talking heads piece. The reason I brought up Silence of the Lambs is the dialogue there was so well written that you hung onto every word Lecter spoke. It was riveting more so by what wasn't said than by what was.

You could try an experiment with creating some conflict by having your killer talk about the flowers in his garden and avoid direct answers to the psychologist. Let the flowers be a metaphor for the young girls he killed, but don't reveal that out loud. Let that be the subtext. See where it goes.

 

[Semiazas]

Depends on what you're trying to accomplish here. What does each character want? Clearly your psychologist was instructed to interview him, but does he want to? Does he care? What does he hope to achieve? Same with the killer. What does he want? What does he hope to achieve? Why should he even bother to talk to this guy?

Establish motivation, establish wants and needs, contrast those wants and needs (give obstacles) and your story will write itself.

Well... I had the idea that he originally just does it because he's told to but he gets drawn into the serial killers web and becomes curious about the killers mind, killings etc.

Although there isn't much room for action in your setting. It has the potential to turn into a boring talking heads piece. The reason I brought up Silence of the Lambs is the dialogue there was so well written that you hung onto every word Lecter spoke. It was riveting more so by what wasn't said than by what was.

You could try an experiment with creating some conflict by having your killer talk about the flowers in his garden and avoid direct answers to the psychologist. Let the flowers be a metaphor for the young girls he killed, but don't reveal that out loud. Let that be the subtext. See where it goes.

Well, I like the idea of the metaphor and not answering questions, particularly as not answering questions or talking about something else can draw the psychologist into the killers web.

EDIT : I like the idea of maybe having, as the killer deflects questions, the psychologist asks more and they get more personal toward the killer, about the killings etc.