Here is a rough draft for a treatment of an exploitation film I'm trying to write so I can get funding for it.
first-time writer-director.
Feel free to comment., There are some easy to get star trek refrences.... The film is supposed to be in the style of a 20's-30's serial with a cliffhanger ending to each act
ACT I
THE AGENAN SEA 1916
HMHS Britannic sister ship of the titanic sinks after striking a
mine. killing 30
MAY 2006
Jessica RIDE (16) is tortured by JETHROE DUBOIS for not giving up
the whereabouts of a little girl named PRISCILLA ANN SOLOMON
The little girl has something he wants a strongbox that holds something he
needs.
Jessica refuses to tell him, she scars him with a hot poker he brands the right side of
her neck with a heated coal hook over and over again.
PRESENT DAY: WASHINGTON DC:
PRESIDENT WILLIAM NIMOY calls a meeting with his secretary of Defence
WILLAM PICARD and scientist RICHARD LESTER, concerning some mysterious
explosions that have occured in the wyoming countryside.
DR. lester explains that it may be connected to a mysterious device
invented by nicolai tesla and thomas edison
BROTHEL
Jessica works as an escort, she is fired after getting into a fight with
a customer who wants his money back after seeing her scar, citing that
she is an "freak"
LOUISVILLE KENTUCKY ORPANAGE/FOSTER CARE CENTER
Jessica visits Priscilla who is now 16 she tries to get custody of
priscilla but is shot down by the Social worker, citing that her
lack of a "good home enviroment" is no good for a girl like priscilla
she notes two suspicious charachters dressed in staff uniform while she leaves.
BILLINGS MONTANA
Jethroe,and businessman LAURENT SCHULLER have a casual dinner meeting behind
a large mansion, in a gazebo. They discuss the current stare of the US economy and how
the US would be so much better if the poor didnt leach off the rich and that the poor
stayed poor.
LOUISVILLE KENTUCKY-TRASHY CRAMPED STUDIO APT
Jessica languishes in her bathtub listening to some old 1920s-30s-40s 78 records of jazz and
opera music. she has intense flashbacks about how she got her scar. She also has flashbacks about
Priscilla entrusting her with a metal strong box she is never to open or allow anyone to see.
SALLOON/PUB
Jessica drinks a few Black Irish beers, her eyes lazily drift upon the same two strangers
she saw at the foster care center. She leaves she doesent notice them following her until she gets into a dark alley.
one of them attacks her she has flashbacks about the night she got branded and tortured, she recognizes the men as being
the ones who beat her and kicked her afterwards.
On instinct, she grabs an old wooden board and smashes it into thier torsos breaking thier ribs, one of them pulls a knife
and she kicks it out of his hand. she grabs the knife and impales him with it.
JESSICA
"send Jethroe my regards"
WASHINGTON DC/The white house
Picard and lester hand president nimoy some photoes of Jethroe doubois on the deck of a ship with a steampunkish
Tesla gun mounted on it. President Nimoy pulls a poster from the drawer of his desk with a publicity photo and information
of jessica ride for an escort service. President nimoy wants Picard to track her down and bring her to DC.
ACT II
TRASHY CRAMED STUDIO APT
Jessica wakes up to find Priscilla sitting by the bed, holding her bleeding arm. Jessica asks her what
happened, she tells her that two men tried to kidnap her from the adoption agency. they wanted the box.
FORT BEAURIGARD LOUISIANNA
The newly raised and restored HMHS Britannic sits in the harbor next to the Civil war fort.
Jethroe picard and Laurent shuller and several men go over the deatils of the weopon, jethroe makes
it clear as to why the need the box it contains the targeting information for the device.
He wants it by any means neccecary. He makes his target known. WASHINGTON DC.
TRASHY CRAMPED STUDIO APT.
Jessica freshens up and holds her gun at the ready when the door comes swinging open to reveal Dr. lester
and several secret service agents. they reaveal thier names, and why they are there.
HOLDING CELL/INTERROGATION ROOM
one of jethroes henchman langiushes in the cell, jessica and picard come marching in,
picard says that they know about the device and that the device wont work without the targeting information
and that jethroe will die before he gets it.
the man refuses to cooperate, jessica inflicts pain upon him which causes him to cooperate. He tells her
where jethroe is and whos funding his operation.
They take a private train or jet to louisinana
Jessica takes a row boat alone to fort beurigard
FORT BEURIGARD
Jethroe, laurent and his henchmen discuss thier plan to destroy the nation capitol
and that they will be attending a ball
Jessica searches through several documents gun at the ready she can hear
Jethroe laurent and several other men laughing and doing business.
She hears absoloutely everything they had previously said.
one of th men catches jessica she shoots him dead. the rest of the men
including jethroe fire thier weopons at her she manages to kill everyone but jethroe
and laurent .
ACT III
THE HMHS BRITANNIC
Jethroe watches the men begin to configure the weopon on the deck of the britannic
jethroe makes it adamant to an Laurent that he needs the targeting information.
Laurent promises that he will find the box.
NATIONAL SCIENCE INSTITUTE
Lester shows her the data on the true capabilities of the tesla gun. He warns her that the weopon's
pattern of destruction can be unpredictable and that once the projectile is fired it cant be stopped
unless its intercepted in midair but no plane can be put in the air fast enough to get to it in time.
WASHINGTON DC, BALLROOM
Jessica in her best getup along with priscilla attend the ball keeping an eye on jethroe and laurent, picard
listens to everything via a mic placed in jessicas bodice
THE HMHS BRITANNIC
the ship sits inside the harbor.
BALLROOM
Jessica moves closer to picard, she even strikes up a conversation with him, he doesent recognize her with the huge glasses she has on.
Jessica then moves on to take care of priscilla who's being stared at by a mysterious man.
Jethroe has a sudden flash of recognition, when he remembers seeing a faint glimpse of a scar on jessicas neck. He gives the man
the signal and the man grabs priscilla who puts up a fight and drags her out the door, Jessica gets in a brawl with several
henchmen. People rush out in panic.
Picard and two secret service agents come bursting in, but its much too late. Priscilla is gone.
HMHS BRITANNIC
Jethroe annd laurent patiently wait as the ship gets the clear to get out of the harbor.
They have Priscilla tied up in the engine room.
THE HARBOR
Jessica sneaks on board the britannic after distracting the guards, she hops in a shipping crate and is bought on board
HMHS britannic
the britannic steams out of port, and into the middle of the harbor
Jessica sneaks out of the crate and sneaks her way through the vessel, she is caught by a fireman/stoker/engineer
He tries to restrain her but she is too quick she trains her gun on him, and asks her where Priscilla is. He refuses,
she shoots him in the arm and forces him to confess, the shot stirs the other men, who go after her firing away.
they alert Jethroe and he comes down Laurent orders the weopon be readied despite not having the prescise targeting
data, without it the eopon will destroy more than just the intended government buildings but jethroe is adament that
they do it.
ENGINE ROOM
Jethroe and a few of his men have an intense gunfight with jessica who kills all of them but jethroe.
Jessica rescues priscilla. The try to escape but jethroe blocks them. Jessica and jethroe fight and Jessica hangs him with the
lifting chains of the engines killing him.
On deck jessica tampers with the weopon after shooting dead except laurent who cant walk after jessica shoos him in the foot
The weopon malfunctions and explodes as jessica and Priscilla shield themslves using the enclosed part of the ships railing
as a shield
THE WHITE HOUSE
Jessica is given a medal by the president of which picard presents to her.
HMHS BRITANNIC
Jessica and Priscilla sail the ship into the sunset, priscilla kisses jessica who tells her that they
cant be togeather because of her age.
THE END?
first-time writer-director.
Feel free to comment., There are some easy to get star trek refrences.... The film is supposed to be in the style of a 20's-30's serial with a cliffhanger ending to each act
ACT I
THE AGENAN SEA 1916
HMHS Britannic sister ship of the titanic sinks after striking a
mine. killing 30
MAY 2006
Jessica RIDE (16) is tortured by JETHROE DUBOIS for not giving up
the whereabouts of a little girl named PRISCILLA ANN SOLOMON
The little girl has something he wants a strongbox that holds something he
needs.
Jessica refuses to tell him, she scars him with a hot poker he brands the right side of
her neck with a heated coal hook over and over again.
PRESENT DAY: WASHINGTON DC:
PRESIDENT WILLIAM NIMOY calls a meeting with his secretary of Defence
WILLAM PICARD and scientist RICHARD LESTER, concerning some mysterious
explosions that have occured in the wyoming countryside.
DR. lester explains that it may be connected to a mysterious device
invented by nicolai tesla and thomas edison
BROTHEL
Jessica works as an escort, she is fired after getting into a fight with
a customer who wants his money back after seeing her scar, citing that
she is an "freak"
LOUISVILLE KENTUCKY ORPANAGE/FOSTER CARE CENTER
Jessica visits Priscilla who is now 16 she tries to get custody of
priscilla but is shot down by the Social worker, citing that her
lack of a "good home enviroment" is no good for a girl like priscilla
she notes two suspicious charachters dressed in staff uniform while she leaves.
BILLINGS MONTANA
Jethroe,and businessman LAURENT SCHULLER have a casual dinner meeting behind
a large mansion, in a gazebo. They discuss the current stare of the US economy and how
the US would be so much better if the poor didnt leach off the rich and that the poor
stayed poor.
LOUISVILLE KENTUCKY-TRASHY CRAMPED STUDIO APT
Jessica languishes in her bathtub listening to some old 1920s-30s-40s 78 records of jazz and
opera music. she has intense flashbacks about how she got her scar. She also has flashbacks about
Priscilla entrusting her with a metal strong box she is never to open or allow anyone to see.
SALLOON/PUB
Jessica drinks a few Black Irish beers, her eyes lazily drift upon the same two strangers
she saw at the foster care center. She leaves she doesent notice them following her until she gets into a dark alley.
one of them attacks her she has flashbacks about the night she got branded and tortured, she recognizes the men as being
the ones who beat her and kicked her afterwards.
On instinct, she grabs an old wooden board and smashes it into thier torsos breaking thier ribs, one of them pulls a knife
and she kicks it out of his hand. she grabs the knife and impales him with it.
JESSICA
"send Jethroe my regards"
WASHINGTON DC/The white house
Picard and lester hand president nimoy some photoes of Jethroe doubois on the deck of a ship with a steampunkish
Tesla gun mounted on it. President Nimoy pulls a poster from the drawer of his desk with a publicity photo and information
of jessica ride for an escort service. President nimoy wants Picard to track her down and bring her to DC.
ACT II
TRASHY CRAMED STUDIO APT
Jessica wakes up to find Priscilla sitting by the bed, holding her bleeding arm. Jessica asks her what
happened, she tells her that two men tried to kidnap her from the adoption agency. they wanted the box.
FORT BEAURIGARD LOUISIANNA
The newly raised and restored HMHS Britannic sits in the harbor next to the Civil war fort.
Jethroe picard and Laurent shuller and several men go over the deatils of the weopon, jethroe makes
it clear as to why the need the box it contains the targeting information for the device.
He wants it by any means neccecary. He makes his target known. WASHINGTON DC.
TRASHY CRAMPED STUDIO APT.
Jessica freshens up and holds her gun at the ready when the door comes swinging open to reveal Dr. lester
and several secret service agents. they reaveal thier names, and why they are there.
HOLDING CELL/INTERROGATION ROOM
one of jethroes henchman langiushes in the cell, jessica and picard come marching in,
picard says that they know about the device and that the device wont work without the targeting information
and that jethroe will die before he gets it.
the man refuses to cooperate, jessica inflicts pain upon him which causes him to cooperate. He tells her
where jethroe is and whos funding his operation.
They take a private train or jet to louisinana
Jessica takes a row boat alone to fort beurigard
FORT BEURIGARD
Jethroe, laurent and his henchmen discuss thier plan to destroy the nation capitol
and that they will be attending a ball
Jessica searches through several documents gun at the ready she can hear
Jethroe laurent and several other men laughing and doing business.
She hears absoloutely everything they had previously said.
one of th men catches jessica she shoots him dead. the rest of the men
including jethroe fire thier weopons at her she manages to kill everyone but jethroe
and laurent .
ACT III
THE HMHS BRITANNIC
Jethroe watches the men begin to configure the weopon on the deck of the britannic
jethroe makes it adamant to an Laurent that he needs the targeting information.
Laurent promises that he will find the box.
NATIONAL SCIENCE INSTITUTE
Lester shows her the data on the true capabilities of the tesla gun. He warns her that the weopon's
pattern of destruction can be unpredictable and that once the projectile is fired it cant be stopped
unless its intercepted in midair but no plane can be put in the air fast enough to get to it in time.
WASHINGTON DC, BALLROOM
Jessica in her best getup along with priscilla attend the ball keeping an eye on jethroe and laurent, picard
listens to everything via a mic placed in jessicas bodice
THE HMHS BRITANNIC
the ship sits inside the harbor.
BALLROOM
Jessica moves closer to picard, she even strikes up a conversation with him, he doesent recognize her with the huge glasses she has on.
Jessica then moves on to take care of priscilla who's being stared at by a mysterious man.
Jethroe has a sudden flash of recognition, when he remembers seeing a faint glimpse of a scar on jessicas neck. He gives the man
the signal and the man grabs priscilla who puts up a fight and drags her out the door, Jessica gets in a brawl with several
henchmen. People rush out in panic.
Picard and two secret service agents come bursting in, but its much too late. Priscilla is gone.
HMHS BRITANNIC
Jethroe annd laurent patiently wait as the ship gets the clear to get out of the harbor.
They have Priscilla tied up in the engine room.
THE HARBOR
Jessica sneaks on board the britannic after distracting the guards, she hops in a shipping crate and is bought on board
HMHS britannic
the britannic steams out of port, and into the middle of the harbor
Jessica sneaks out of the crate and sneaks her way through the vessel, she is caught by a fireman/stoker/engineer
He tries to restrain her but she is too quick she trains her gun on him, and asks her where Priscilla is. He refuses,
she shoots him in the arm and forces him to confess, the shot stirs the other men, who go after her firing away.
they alert Jethroe and he comes down Laurent orders the weopon be readied despite not having the prescise targeting
data, without it the eopon will destroy more than just the intended government buildings but jethroe is adament that
they do it.
ENGINE ROOM
Jethroe and a few of his men have an intense gunfight with jessica who kills all of them but jethroe.
Jessica rescues priscilla. The try to escape but jethroe blocks them. Jessica and jethroe fight and Jessica hangs him with the
lifting chains of the engines killing him.
On deck jessica tampers with the weopon after shooting dead except laurent who cant walk after jessica shoos him in the foot
The weopon malfunctions and explodes as jessica and Priscilla shield themslves using the enclosed part of the ships railing
as a shield
THE WHITE HOUSE
Jessica is given a medal by the president of which picard presents to her.
HMHS BRITANNIC
Jessica and Priscilla sail the ship into the sunset, priscilla kisses jessica who tells her that they
cant be togeather because of her age.
THE END?
