archived-videos Take Out (A Silent Film) *first post*

[dinoggler]

Hey Everyone!! The name's Ben. I'm really new to this website (just made an account a few minutes ago) and will be heading off to film school in a few months (for which I'm really excited.) I just wanted to get some feedback on a short film that I recently wrote and directed. I would love to get your thoughts and criticism! Enjoy!!

The film is called 'Take Out' and is a silent film.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=07zDJQZtr0s

 

[ChimpPhobiaFilms]

Ben!

Your short is pretty good, but a few things bothered me. It was way too long, and slowly paced. A short should grab your attention immediately, start with a strong opening. There were some jump cuts that distracted me such as the pizza man at the door. There are some overexposed parts too. On the more positive side, the camerawork, color correction, music, acting, and idea is good.