No doorbell?
WD 40 your entry door hinges.
"The actual light is actually dead". Really for really?
One healthy young man asks another healthy young man to clean up the garage? Okay.
In the "dark" basement you can either increase the ISO or slow down the shutter speed to allow more light onto your CMOS sensor.
Dude's cleaning a stranger's basement in his socks, no shoes?
"I read this book... [while I'm supposed to be cleaning your basement as you sit up here and read newspaper advertisements]." Okay.
I'm pretty sure he just left.
Umm... yep. He's gone.
The audio... yeah. I know you're going to have trouble in that environment no matter what you do.
I don't think there's a sensible enough number of blankets for that environment to lay down as echo dampers.
Plan more outdoor shots?!
Weather, wind, etc. I know.
At least there's no grasshoppers and cicadas out this time of year!
In the entry scene it would be beneficial to have Over The Shoulder (OTS) camera shots of both principles.
Deliver the lines at least twice from both perspectives. Edit accordingly from those.
We can't see what spooks the cleaner dude while reading Babblese from the book.
Presumably dangerous Shadadas book is just lying around, cast among a pile of laundry. Okay.
Okay, so with any "film' project there are at least two big things a director/producer always has to be on top of. One, the story. Two, execution.
Good story + poor execution = "Meh... " to forgivable.
Poor story + good execution = most probably a fail.
Poor story + poor execution = Fail.
Good story + good execution = Win!
Please please please keep working on both aspects.
What would be cool is to keep this fundamental story, rework it as a screenplay, re-shoot it, re-edit it, re-post it and lettuce see how you went from A to B, (maybe even C or D!).
GL! And a havahappyfastivusnewyear!
