archived-videos Screen a Rough Cut of my comedy Pilot. Laugh til you ____ your pants?

[bez]

Hey guys,
Been a hot second since I've been on the board. I've been quite busy with my pilot. Anyhow, I have about 10 minutes of a very rough cut (temp score) without any post. However, you'll notice its very high quality. Also, it's missing the entire middle (which will have a ton of CGI dinosaur goodness). Just post here that you wanna see it and I'll PM you the private link.

Pterodactyl Surprise!!! It's a stoner comedy...and I promise if you liked Clerks or Harold and Kumar go to white castle...you'll find this funny and very fast moving.

All I want from you is a few notes. Thoughts...anything you care to offer. What you're seeing was created on a $700 budget with working Union actors (friends) and a ton a favors and good fortunes. Also...my big question is do you think this should be a show (right now its looking to be about 23 mins) or should I finish the pilot and then complete the script as a feature?

 

[bez]

First of all, great job! The only thing that really jumped out at me was that the audio needs to be cleaned-up, but you of course mentioned that no post work has been done, and I assume that will be on the slate.

Funny thing -- I actually like it without the missing footage that was originally intended to be in the middle. Of course I might change my mind, if I were to see that glorious CG-dino-footage, but as is, I think this incomplete 10-minutes could serve nicely as a set-up for the craziness. Which will of course follow, in either a complete feature film, or a series.

The way you've got it edited here, it's kinda like the beginning of Hangover. Boys get together for a bachelor party. Skip-forward in time to the next morning, and obviously all sorts of craziness has happened. We don't yet know what happened, but we'll figure it out.

Same thing with your movie/pilot. I think a jump-forward in time might be a fun way of hinting to the audience what is to come. If you were to choose to do this type of thing, I would stay far away from exposition. The beginning of Hangover is so great because the characters are just as lost as the audience.

Not sure if any of these comments are even relevant, but I hope they help. I'm a believer in what you're doing!

Love it...Thanks for the comments! These are a big help!