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It Started Off As…Lovers | A Short Thriller Movie

Have watched it and happy to give feedback ... if you're going to hang around long enough to read it and engage!

(Sorry - have had rather too many previous experiences of people disappearing into the ether as soon as they've posted ... :abduct: )
Im happy to hear all the feedback for this :)
 
Well, to begin: congratulations on turning an idea into a finished production - there's many a project that never reaches that stage.

Having done that and seen the results, what have you identified as the "must try harder" elements of the production? It wouldn't be fair to criticise mercilessly some aspect that doesn't meet your own expectations! :angry:

The main thing that stood out for me was a lack of natural development in the exchange between the two characters. It got off to a bad start with a peculiar choice of camerawork - after a brief establishing shot at 1m28s, there follows nearly two minutes of arguing with neither in the same shot as the other! During this exchange, it seems like you're trying to portray Noah as being distracted, but it's hard to know because we can't actually see whether he's maintaining eye-contact with Mel, or not.

When the action moved to the kitchen, especially with the really harsh, abrupt change of lighting, I was expecting a similarly abrupt change of pace ... but no, it was the same argument (part 2), both of them referring to old "stuff" with no explanation as to why this was coming to a head now ... and then back into the sitting room where now we get the abrupt change from what might have been legitimately passed off as a "crime of passion" in the kitchen to an obviously pre-meditated assault gone wrong. Huh?

Instead of having the two characters screaming at each other for five minutes, you could have done a lot more to build a solid back story then ramp up the tension to the end with same climax in a more natural way.
 
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Thanks for the feedback. I learnt a lot of different things with this and I’m definitely going to improve on the next one. Got a lot of ideas.
 
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