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Help With A New Approach

Modern Day Myth Prod. LLC

Modern Day Myth Prod. LLC

Hey guys,

I am back taking tiny steps. I am working on the treatment for a round two pilot / TV movie if we need to make more than one TV movies to get a series contract.

Here is the new approach. Can someone point me where to find a link to the script for the TV pilot of Terminator The Sarah Connor Chronicles?

I want to read it before I start writing the new script for inspiration, ideas for pacing and structure.

Thanks,

Mike
 
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I found it on SimplyScripts.com

Just reading the teleplay for the most popular TV pilot of all times should light my jet engines for writing the teleplay I am working on now.

By the way, the show runner was from the TV series Andromeda and passed on my series. I am revamping things for future show runners to see new stuff in the package in the story bible and new script. I am also taking the risk of creating seven new characters to the existing list of series regular characters because the new characters will add more depth and dimension to the series.
 
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I started reading the pilot script of Terminator The Sarah Conner Chronicles and I already see something significantly different than the rules most of us here used. Josh Friedman wrote the script and it starts off with images of traveling on a road with lots of philosophical voice overs about death. Then, there are more voice overs by the lead character, Sarah Connor to set the tone of the story and the journey the characters are on.

That is food for thought. Be less visual and more philosophical. This reminds me of what Syd Field told us in screen writing class to be less visual, so the art department can do their part in a production.

I thought this is worth mentioning.
 
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But is your treatment for an established franchise or is it a "new" concept? That's what is going to make the difference. We already know a lot about Sarah and the Terminator premise, so we are predisposed and willing to be updated. That may not be the case with something that is not connected to an established franchise.

With a new concept you need to provide a lot of information quickly, but you need to do it in an interesting way. A project I worked on a number of years ago started with one of the protagonists in a hotel room preparing for a confrontation. The TV news was on in the background, with occasional shots of the news itself; we watched him going through his routine but listened to the background information provided by the news. His reactions to certain things in the news broadcast supplied more info about his involvement in the news story.
 
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Voice Over narrations are used extensively in trailers to bring viewers up to speed with the main characters and the conflict in a story in a 90 second to two and a half minute presentation.

Here again, it is used to set the tone of the story and bring us up to speed with characters not everyone is familiar with.

I was told by a script consultant with the script for I, Creator 2 - Goddess of the Hunt to use voice overs in the beginning to bring everyone up to speed with the main characters.

Now, I am seeing it done with a studio script.
 
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The part about being philosophical in the opening has been used in classical literature such as Charles Dickens, A TALE OF TWO CITIES.

It is also used in Ray Bradberry's THE MARTIAN CHRONICLES.

I can do this too, when I go from treatment to script with my opening about the promise of The Singularity.
 
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Be very careful with the technique. There is a thin line between bringing a viewer up to speed who has not seen the show before and boring a regular viewer. "Dexter" makes an effective use of voiceover to bridge episodes and titillate the viewer. The visuals need to tell their own story and the voiceover needs to be minimalist (which gives the appearance of being philosophical often). Use of voiceovers can come across as preachy. And if the background images aren't particularly interesting, you risk the viewer flipping to another channel. The old "Dragnet" started off with a running dialogue to set up the episode. Even "Star Trek" had its captain's log. I think the key to what made these uses of voiceover more successful is they were a counterpoint to the visual. Be careful not to describe what the audience is seeing (exposition) but to hint at what they don't see that is the foundation for the episode (foreshadowing).
 
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Good points. But, don't be afraid to be preachy either because there is enough of the population that likes it thanks to the Star Trek generation. If it works with the personality of the character, let it flow. A goddess character, such as Artemis is a teacher among her creatures. She created the universe. So, she has been around from the dawn of time and exists everywhere taking on manifestations that her creation will recognize and feel comfortable with.

This is different from the Greko Roman gods from their Titan ancestry. I am using the original version of Artemis of Ephesus, which is older than the Greko Roman gods. I am also combining it with Albert Einstein's theory about god in the Universe. At the risk of not being able to teach old dogs new tricks, I am pushing this new version of an all knowing Artemis.

She will be the series narrator.
 
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The philosophy of Writers Digest is writers have a way with words.

The most talked about part of the Thor movie you can find by googling as I did was the philosophy "Magic is just science we don't understand yet." They were just building on ideas from Ray Bradberry.

So, words that made people think turned out to be mightier than the sword of the Vfx and action.

Marvin Minsky uses that analogy with the conventional notions that AI cannot have feelings or a consciousness. The human brain is magic today. But, one day it will be science. Cray computers will decipher how it works. And, the magic will go away and we will be able to put feelings and an artificial consciousness into an AI being.

Let's not be afraid to be writers and have a way with words. People need to feel something when they watch a film or read a script. I am aiming to do something wonderful with the two screenplays I am working on.

The promise of The Singularity changing us, machines, technology, and our world is exponential.

My hardest sell will be with the comfortable shoes in the networks and studios who still use their snail mail and faxes while the rest of the world uses emails is to tell a story in a series where normal humans are not the stars and something that is built can be a legal guardian or best friend with someone who is born. But, they cannot mate and make little Heras.
 
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