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Fate, a 9 page short.

T

tDOT

Fate, a 9 page short (Google Doc Link)

Hello,
I'd like to get your opinion on my short "fate". The story features a character named Robert, a troubled teen battling with his psychosis.

They say you shouldn't write with restrictions but in this case I wrote something I can actually film. Big leap here for me guys, let me know what you think!

Fate hosted by Google Docs
 
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tDOT said:
Hello,
I'd like to get your opinion on my short "fate". The story features a character named Robert, a troubled teen battling with his psychosis.

They say you shouldn't write with restrictions but in this case I wrote something I can actually film. Big leap here for me guys, let me know what you think!

Fate hosted by Google Docs
Click to expand...

That was great. There's some grammatical errors, a couple of scenes where the dialogue wasn't believable, but it's definitely good IMO.

It seems a bit surreal and theatrical, but I tend to like that kind of stuff.
 
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i liked it quite a bit, the only suggestion i would make is don't superimpose that you're the one who made it. first off, you don't want to seem vain if this is your first time and second it will draw away from the feel you get when it's first turned on.
those are just my thoughts, but i liked it. hope it turns out good.

-A.P
 
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Thanks for the positive feedback,
This is my first short a.p, and I'll take your suggestion in to practice. It really did feel pretentious writing my name as a writer and director (of course tDot as an aliases for my real name), I'll keep this in mind for this project and future ones.
 
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