archived-videos Echo - Short Film

M

MikeBFilm

Made this short earlier this year. Shot it on a T2i over a couple days. Did most of it myself so that proved to be a great learning experience. Was interesting to see how the entire story changed to work around random problems that popped up from time to time.

I hope you like it.

-Mike

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XcAd9oc9AFM?hd=1
 
Upvote 0
I enjoyed it, the shooting style was very interesting and I'm sure it was very intentional that it be jarring the first time we see the woman completely in focus. I liked that a lot, playing with focus and shooting conventions to get a certain feel.

The only thing that caught my eye was the dinner scene. It was shown mostly from the master shot or similar angles. I think it could have benefited from some more intimate angles such as over the shoulders and what not. Also it may be due in part to the acting here, but I didn't feel that connected to their love in this scene. I felt almost as if they were more old friends than a couple truly in love, but that's just me.

One other thing I might say is that it's obvious from the first time she disappears from the bed that she has died and he is mourning her loss. I'm not sure if this is intentional, unintentional, or if it simply doesn't matter that it's obvious. But, for me it just kinda seemed clear from the beginning where it was going.

Overall great work! I enjoyed it quite a lot which is more than I can say for most films I see on YouTube. I hope to see more from you in the future!
 
tommygdawg said:
I enjoyed it, the shooting style was very interesting and I'm sure it was very intentional that it be jarring the first time we see the woman completely in focus. I liked that a lot, playing with focus and shooting conventions to get a certain feel.

The only thing that caught my eye was the dinner scene. It was shown mostly from the master shot or similar angles. I think it could have benefited from some more intimate angles such as over the shoulders and what not. Also it may be due in part to the acting here, but I didn't feel that connected to their love in this scene. I felt almost as if they were more old friends than a couple truly in love, but that's just me.

One other thing I might say is that it's obvious from the first time she disappears from the bed that she has died and he is mourning her loss. I'm not sure if this is intentional, unintentional, or if it simply doesn't matter that it's obvious. But, for me it just kinda seemed clear from the beginning where it was going.

Overall great work! I enjoyed it quite a lot which is more than I can say for most films I see on YouTube. I hope to see more from you in the future!
Click to expand...

Thank you for the feedback and constructive criticism.

You are absolutely correct on the dinner scene. I do not feel like I got the right emotions to really make that part correct, and almost 6 months later I would shoot (well, the whole thing) that scene very differently.

Yes. I was very on the nose. Again, I've definitely seen vast improvements in story telling from here, and I was hoping to have it more of a shock, but it came across as very on the nose. Good call.

Thanks. Hopefully my next ones will be several steps above this.

Mike
 
Great job. I think this short really was well done. I felt a little emotional after watching it so I guess that means you did a good job. I was wondering when she got the flowers was that the grave yard. I figured once you showed her picking them up you would show a day scene of the grave yard and the flowers by the grave.
 
rockerrockstar said:
Great job. I think this short really was well done. I felt a little emotional after watching it so I guess that means you did a good job. I was wondering when she got the flowers was that the grave yard. I figured once you showed her picking them up you would show a day scene of the grave yard and the flowers by the grave.
Click to expand...

Glad it touched you. Actually, that was supposed to be shot next to the tree where the car crashed. Funny because there's absolutely not light near the tree when the car's heading towards it but there's suddenly enough light from an unknown source to illuminate her :D:lol:
 
Was very nicely done, but as others have pointed out it was kind of obvious what happened from the get go. With that in mind, a lot of the shots felt a bit too... I don't know what the word is... interactive? That you were going with the idea that his wife was dead, shots that had stuff like her helping him do his tie just felt out of place, whereas others that involved him simply remembering how his wife feels (like the opening shot of him in bed) were very appropriate. Perhaps instead of doing scenes where they're talking, it could have done with scenes where he's getting ready and you just see her out of focus in the background of the mirror, going about her daily routine. Direct communication between the two just didn't feel right.

With all that said, it was a very well done short! I'll look forward to seeing more from you :)
 
MikeBFilm said:
Thank you for the feedback and constructive criticism.

You are absolutely correct on the dinner scene. I do not feel like I got the right emotions to really make that part correct, and almost 6 months later I would shoot (well, the whole thing) that scene very differently.

Yes. I was very on the nose. Again, I've definitely seen vast improvements in story telling from here, and I was hoping to have it more of a shock, but it
came across as very on the nose. Good call.

Thanks. Hopefully my next ones will be several steps above this.

Mike
Click to expand...

I know what you mean. Its always interesting to look back on older projects and think what you would do differently. A year later now, I know theres certainly a lot of things I'd do differently on my first short film. Film is a constant learning experience :) anyhow, like I said: good work overall!
 
I thought the dinner scene was weak too, I actually thought you might have done it guerilla style since the rest of it was so well composed.
What'd you use to get those nice tracking shots in the apartment?
Good job.
 
laurenvictoria said:
nice! and nice cinematography! what lens did you use?
Click to expand...

Thanks. A 24L, 50 1.4 and I think that was it.

ThatGuyFromThatPlace said:
Was very nicely done, but as others have pointed out it was kind of obvious what happened from the get go. With that in mind, a lot of the shots felt a bit too... I don't know what the word is... interactive? That you were going with the idea that his wife was dead, shots that had stuff like her helping him do his tie just felt out of place, whereas others that involved him simply remembering how his wife feels (like the opening shot of him in bed) were very appropriate. Perhaps instead of doing scenes where they're talking, it could have done with scenes where he's getting ready and you just see her out of focus in the background of the mirror, going about her daily routine. Direct communication between the two just didn't feel right.

With all that said, it was a very well done short! I'll look forward to seeing more from you :)
Click to expand...

Agreed. I wish I would have kept her more out of focus until the very end. Like I'd mentioned earlier it's interesting to look back and see how you would have changed just about everything in the shoot. :weird:

Thanks. My other short, Unsaid, is up in Experimental. I've got two others that aren't on here, and a 5th short in post right now and a 6th I directed for someone else out to festivals. Hopefully I can keep growing and learning. :D

tommygdawg said:
I know what you mean. Its always interesting to look back on older projects and think what you would do differently. A year later now, I know theres certainly a lot of things I'd do differently on my first short film. Film is a constant learning experience :) anyhow, like I said: good work overall!
Click to expand...

Hell yes. And, with 4-5 more shorts in prep I hopefully will continue to grow.

brianluce said:
I thought the dinner scene was weak too, I actually thought you might have done it guerilla style since the rest of it was so well composed.
What'd you use to get those nice tracking shots in the apartment?
Good job.
Click to expand...

Thanks for the notes. I'm a little confused. If I had shot guerilla style wouldn't the dinner scene have been the shakiest of the shots? Though I do think it's the weakest scene, I personally think it's the best shot of the entire short. Am I wrong?

My mentor has a homemade Dolly he lets me use. Almost all of my work uses it.

Thanks
 
The more I watch this film, the more I like it. To see a guy, loving a woman so much, makes me feel good.
I like the dinner scene, honestly.
It's a good story, well shot.
 
MikeBFilm said:
Thanks for the notes. I'm a little confused. If I had shot guerilla style wouldn't the dinner scene have been the shakiest of the shots? Though I do think it's the weakest scene, I personally think it's the best shot of the entire short. Am I wrong?

My mentor has a homemade Dolly he lets me use. Almost all of my work uses it.

Thanks
Click to expand...

It was static, uninteresting looking, locked down. You can get geurilla shots like that. The dollying is pretty hard to do guerilla style.
 
kinglis said:
The more I watch this film, the more I like it. To see a guy, loving a woman so much, makes me feel good.
I like the dinner scene, honestly.
It's a good story, well shot.
Click to expand...

Thanks.

brianluce said:
It was static, uninteresting looking, locked down. You can get geurilla shots like that. The dollying is pretty hard to do guerilla style.
Click to expand...

Ah, when I think guerilla. I think crappy handheld. I refuse to do static shots guerilla style because I'm terrified of getting in trouble. If you see hand held in my shorts that is guerilla. But maybe that's just me.

Dolly I wouldn't even dream of guerilla. :D
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top