While I kind of saw where you wanted to go, the story kind of rambles. The characters just kind of move through events, so you never really get a good sense of who they are. The script is too focused on the actions and not enough on developing the characters in a believable way. That's partly due to the dialogue. It sounds very stilted and artificial.
You rush through the beginning to get to the woods scene. You need to take your time or decide what's more important. The scene with the father could be skipped. Start with the two of them having lunch in the park. Have him go to the water fountain at the park and be bullied. The transitions are too abrupt and need to be slowed down to develop the character of Sarah, Evelyn and Cameron.
The power of a good horror is that if the audience cares about your heroes, then the suspense increases. As it is, they zip by so superficially, that I kind of lose interest. It became a ho-hum teen slasher. The showdown at the end doesn't resolve anything and I really didn't think it made a point. Since there was no emotional attachment, the ending was, I'm afraid to say, lame.
I think it could use some more polishing before the shoot. What do you really want the audience to feel at the end about Sarah? Cameron? Evelyn? Or even Miles who is not well developed but central.
While I can see the thread of the story, it isn't well supported by the characters or dialogue. The resolution isn't satisfying because of the lack of development. I'd go back and tackle those issues.
