Anyone else hate when they do this in thrillers?

2001 Productions said:
Hey Ray, my personal favorite of all time was in a film called, I think, The River Wild... have you seen this?

... this director was assuming his audience was comprised of complete and utter morons. It's the only thing I remember about that stupid movie.
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Yes I have, when it first came out.
I don't specifically recall that (or really any) scene, but am not in the least bit surprised.

Yeah, I mean what's the director to do?
If you, as director, know your audience is primarily a bunch of stupid suburbanites that doesn't understand how anything more complicated than how their stereo system works then do you try to educate them or just give 'em what they want/need?
I wanna educate 'em, but... I don't wanna bugger with pace and tone just to stop every two minutes and explain how the real world works.
Does the audience even want that?
Does the audience actually enjoy being "superior" to the stupid director?
I dunno.

Some sh!t you can get away with.
Some you can't.
It's sometimes weird playing politics and social sciences with a simple stupid film for entertainment. :(
 
I hate it when an "Expert" has a gun malfuction and panics. He pulls the trigger, you hear a click, he charges the bad guy. He pulls the trigger, the gun stops working, he fiddles then gives up (throws gun down or equal).

There's literally only so many things that will make a gun not go bang. And most can be solved by tilting the barrel 10 degrees up and glancing at the ejection port. Anybody who's ever shot a box of wolf ammo can tell you that.
 
Lowxposure said:
I hate it when an "Expert" has a gun malfuction and panics. He pulls the trigger, you hear a click, he charges the bad guy. He pulls the trigger, the gun stops working, he fiddles then gives up (throws gun down or equal).

There's literally only so many things that will make a gun not go bang. And most can be solved by tilting the barrel 10 degrees up and glancing at the ejection port. Anybody who's ever shot a box of wolf ammo can tell you that.
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GRRRR!!!
Stupid dumb munkey muthers!!!!

Who do we shoot?!
The directors or the audience?

I'm gonna make a short where the protag and antag just run around a bulletproof drywalled house with bulletproof couches and "oak"-LMAO- tables racking their slides and cocking their revolver hammers for dramatic emphasis!
And the sneaky antag has a autoloader shotgun but d@mned if he doesn't pump another slug in.
BECAUSE IT SOUNDS COOOOOL!!!!
Like he's actually DOOOOING something!
Because OBVIOUSLY Billy Bada$$ came to the scene with an empty breach.
Like ALLLLL pros do!
And everyone's just gonna politely ignore perfectly good unspent bullets and shells ejecting all over the floor!
Maybe I can finally use my camera's slo-mo feature to capture them bouncing off the hardwood floors!

Rack!
Rack!
Rack!

Cock!
Cock!
Cock!

Pump!
Pump!
Pump!

Around, around the Mullberry House.
The antag chased the protag.
The protag thought it was all in fun,
Until Rack!Cock!Pump! go the antags!

OMG.
I'd die of embarrassment.
 
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Modern Day Myth Prod. LLC said:
I gun shot can give away someone's location.

So, if you don't have a silencer, go stealth by throwing daggers like in Double Impact with Jean Claude Van Damn.
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Yeaaaah!!!
Every throw is circus performance perfect!
And I got a belt full of 'em!
trejo_danny_desperado_44046l.jpg


'Cause I'm an idiot!
I brought a single shot pistol!
200px-Deer_Gun_-_Vietnam_Pistol.jpg

And I don't want to disclose my location!
'Cause I don't have any more bullets!
'Cause I'm an idiot!

Ain't I... SEXXXXXAAAYYY!!!!
real-gangsta.jpg
 
Who do we shoot?!
The directors or the audience?
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I only complain about it in movies that are supposed to be serious. There is literally nothing I love more than a campy '80s action flick. Could any of it happen? No. That's why it's awesome.

But when you've got an actual "thriller" there's no excuse. If you can't afford a gun guru I'm more than willin to travel to wherever you are for the cost of a plane ticket and a few meals to show you how your props work.

We could do an IT group thing Lucky could drop some info on LE and Ray could help explain sarcasm.

Ain't I... SEXXXXXAAAYYY!!!!
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How did you find my real picture?
 
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Lowxposure said:
We could do an IT group thing Lucky could drop some info on LE and Ray could help explain sarcasm.
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Sarcasm:
First, you reach out with both hands.
Second, you bend down and firmly grasp both ankles.
Third, channel the cosmic chakra or whatever through your glory portal.
Yeah, baby. You feelin' it?
Psst! Low! Hand me another pool cue. And get the camera. LOL!


Lowxposure said:
How did you find my real picture?
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Dude, you'll never be that... robust. Pfft! Ha!
At best all you're getting is a little pudge in the front and sides.

I wanna know about the person taking the picture.
I wanna know WTH was he thinkin' because I KNOW his girlfriend didn't take it.
:lol: :lol: :lol:

And you know he's not going to fare well in prison.
I can tell just by looking at him. That pig's gonna squeal with his purty mouth.

Excuse me while I go vomit...




Lowxposure said:
If you only knew how many times I've posed in my blackie tighties next to my obnoxious gun collection. I don't measure my robust-itude in girth.
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LA! LA! LA! Don't wanna know about it! Don't wanna know about it! LA! LA! LA!...
 
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