archived-videos Albert - a short film

Could've racked focus on that first slider move when she comes in rather than cutting to her. A bit slow, but to pretty good effect. It fit the tone well. The tone and style of the movie also were clear and effective, great location, great color, pace made sense, I thought the tone was the strongest aspect. Music however didn't fit perfectly, a little too melancholy for what I thought the story to be (and turn it down a bit), but still a very strong choice and it doesn't distract. Little effort appeared in the "Will" prop. Audio peaked when she yells and was too soft/washed out by other music later. I was a bit unsure as to what happened,
I understand it to be that a wife comes home to see her husband, a forgetful person which annoys her, left another mess. Included in this mess is something in a tea can (what is it? a pet mouse?) and a will, both of which she disapproves of for some reason (too unclear), so she destroys whatever is precious to her husband in the tea can.
A verification there would be nice because it seems more like a "day in the life" rather than a story. Which of course isn't a bad thing, but for something a bit longer (as I think 8 min starts to be on the longer side) like this, I want to be interested in whats happening, and I really wasn't. I think an easy way to change that would have been to see a little bit more of each character's motivation. Why is she mad about what is in the tea can? What is in it? What's wrong with the Will? Why is her husband so protective of these objects? Why does he care for the contents of the tea can so much? Remember that conflict is oh so important in storytelling.

That's the whole of it, good, bad, and ugly. I give it a 7/10 and with a few very minor changes, probably a 8 or 9. Keep doing great things, man!
 
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