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For me the inciting incident was actually the news of the father's illness, but you are basically saying that Robert McKee would kick me in the ass if reads that ahahah Ok. I see. Let's go one step further, then. Let's say I find a better inciting incident, he brothers need to save the bakery...

But if you didn't even want to see the film, how could you want to watch my Tv Drama? ahahahah But yes, I see what you mean.

You first say: "Yes, my question was what happens if that manager show it to the producer?" Then you say: "Forget the manager, I'm asking about the cases you send your script directly to producers." A bit confusing. Anyway yeah, agree with what mlesemann said. Never send your script to...

That's an interesting point. Basically adding more "drama to the drama" to make the story more appealing, make something happen that is "visible" while showing the internal journey of the protagonists. Does anyone else agree with this point of view?

Hmm, good question. Although I would assume that AT LEAST in that instance you would have the manager fighting for/with you? Like, helping you finding a good solicitor. That being said, I also believe that, if we stop and think about all this, we would never send our scripts around and we would...

What is exactly not clear? The film is about two brothers, who come back to their childhood home because the father is sick and the mother asks them to come and help. One of the brothers hates the father, but because he is dying, he tries to build some sort of relationship with him, while the...

I don't think an agent or a manager would steal your work. It might be more of a concern when you send it to producers/prod companies, in my opinion.

When two brothers are brought back together in their childhood home by their mother, they are forced to confront two problems. For one, patching up his relationship with a father he hates despite his illness. For the other, coming out to their ultra-religious mother.

What if I put it in the form of a question? So, using part of the logline you suggested, it would be something like: When two brothers are brought back together in their childhood home by their mother, two problems arises: how can one patch up a relationship with a father he hates despite his...

Thanks mlesemann for the feedback. So you mean that, even though the religion is specified in the story, in the logline can be more general, to make the logline (and so the story) feel more "universal"? Andrea doesn't really "yearn" to reconcile, he hates him. So for him it's more something...

Andrea, Rosario and the parents live in three different places. The mother convinces the two sons to spend a few days in the family house, so that they can help her take care of the father, as well as spending some time with him. So the story takes place mainly in their childhood city.

In a small Italian town, Andrea is forced to patch up a relationship with his grumpy dying father, while his brother Rosario struggles to confess to their hyper-catholic mother his homosexuality. Trying to look at it with an objective eye, I don't think it's clear the age of the brothers in...

Thanks geckopelli for the wisdom. I actually have logline and synopsis ready only for one script, so I'll work on the other ones too now! Get everything ready as you said before sending out. Thank you

Hi guys So far I have four completed feature scripts (2X Drama, 1X Action/Drama, 1X Thriller/Drama), one 20 page treatment for another idea (Action/Comedy) and I am writing my 5th feature (Comedy/Drama). I am aware of the value of getting a good placement in some respected competitions, which...

Hello everyone! as the title suggests, I am a camera operator whose final goal is to transition into screenwriting/directing. Glad to join the indietalk family :)