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Short film idea

A

AmateurD

Hello guys.

I was thinking about this and i'd like to know your opinions please, if it's worth writing or simply it just doesnt work, i'm in the wrong way.

I dont have the whole story, so i'll tell what i have.

It's a guy that buys an handheld cam online. When the product arrives by mail, he does a quick test to see if everything is ok and sees that there's a video already recorded in the camera. He then connects the cam (or just an SD card) to the computer and starts to see the video. It is a video of a girl (and i dont know yet the reasons) telling that she'll kill herself, unless the man to whom she sold the cam convince her that live worth living.

Then my idea was to show that the guy also bought the camera to record a video statement before end his life. In the end everything ends well, knowing that they have each other support.

I've turned the story around because my initial thought was that the content in that video could be a murder or something like that.

PS: Just by writing this, it all seems a bit stupid and nonsense.

Anyways, your opinions and help are more than welcome.
Thanks.
 
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I'm curious.. You have my curiosity.

But you seem to be in dangerous territory of sounding cliche.

Maybe the girl is in another country.
Maybe the girl is in the same room the guy was going to kill himself in and it's paranormal.
Maybe the guy finds out later the video never existed.

So many possibilities.
 
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It's too coincidental, which makes it non-believable. I love the idea that she's threatening to kill herself but, perhaps the guy shouldn't also want to kill himself. Maybe, he's sort of in between. Like, he's the typical melancholy character whose trying to figure out how to better himself and through saving her life and giving value to her, he realizes that life can be rich and all that good stuff. I don't know. But either way, I think it's a great framework.
 
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Yep, My thought's similar to Firm1. I liked the first part where he finds the girl video in the video camera itself. But the part where he also gets suicidal and both support each other is a bit odd. I think it would be more interesting to see the guy trying to find out who the girl is and what he does to stop her.
 
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OMG. What is it with young adults and suicide scripts. Pairing it with found footage? Enough!

Please, go in a different direction. Getting a camera and finding a memory card still in the bag with 'snuff scene' or murder on it is fine with a note, he's next. Now the murderer is out to get it back. The cops don't believe the kid thinking it's a hoax. Maybe it is. Whatever.

Just please no "S/he will commit suicide unless...". That's like every other script I get from students. Ugh, just no. And NO "his/her mom/dad is abusive/alcoholic/a drug user and divorced/separated who doesn't understand his/her life and needs".

Mystery, comedy, thriller, anything.
Maybe a scifi bent. He sees something alien and now seeks to find out.
Maybe fantasy. He sees a person transform into a werewolf and wants to find out about this cool effect.
Lots of ways to go. Think outside the box.
 
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Thank you all for your replies.

FantasySciFi yes i understand that the whole suicide stuff is cliche, but i was/am trying to do it in a different way, i dont know.

Maybe i'll just have to skip this and think in another one.

Thank you.
 
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When I started reading it, I first thought of a fairly recent horror film that I can't remember the name of, where a man finds a series of tapes in the attic of the 'haunted' house him and his family are living in. In my opinion you need to look at your story a bit, and try and see how you can tweak it a bit so the audience cares for the characters, now obviously most people don't want to see someone commit suicide, but I think your strength in that idea is you've created 1 / or 2 characters who have flaws, and a lot of great stories start out with a flawed character wanting something.

Just a suggestion but maybe the guy buys the camera of some crooks who stole it, and the guy is thinking "wehey, big new camera at a huge discount" - goes home tries it out and finds the recording, then maybe gets threats from the thugs who are torturing the girl to kill herself, ? something along those lines might give you some ideas!

:) stick at it, try and steer it away from a horror type genre, but try not to make it a "Taken" action-y one either, in my opinion those have been done over and over!
 
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YoungCK94 said:
When I started reading it, I first thought of a fairly recent horror film that I can't remember the name of, where a man finds a series of tapes in the attic of the 'haunted' house him and his family are living in. In my opinion you need to look at your story a bit, and try and see how you can tweak it a bit so the audience cares for the characters, now obviously most people don't want to see someone commit suicide, but I think your strength in that idea is you've created 1 / or 2 characters who have flaws, and a lot of great stories start out with a flawed character wanting something.

Just a suggestion but maybe the guy buys the camera of some crooks who stole it, and the guy is thinking "wehey, big new camera at a huge discount" - goes home tries it out and finds the recording, then maybe gets threats from the thugs who are torturing the girl to kill herself, ? something along those lines might give you some ideas!

:) stick at it, try and steer it away from a horror type genre, but try not to make it a "Taken" action-y one either, in my opinion those have been done over and over!
Click to expand...

Hi.

Thank you for your input, appreciate that.

Sometimes when come up with something, at the beginning i think it's a good concept but then i start to feel that it's already been done to death.
 
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AmateurD said:
Hi.

Was trying to figure that out, but dont know if i'll continue with this story.

Thank you.
Click to expand...

Why not? What about an alternative idea? Something fantastic/mystic
He buys a video cam, and finds a video of his own murder. Now he knows what's going to happen to him in the future, and must prevent it. What do you think?
 
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AmateurD, if you don't write this story some day, I will ;)

P.S.
Why is it easier for me to give ideas to others, than finding ideas for myself? :huh:

FantasySciFi said:
Your teacher would disapprove but I like it. :lol:
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I guess my teacher, like everybody else in this world, have a genre or a direction in movies they don't like. Personally, I don't like over-realism in movies. If I want to see realism, I don't need to watch movies at all. But that's just me :lol:
 
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