Hello friends,
I am writing an original short story and would love some feedback. I know the formatting needs work, and the scenes are misplaced in places, but I will fix that in future revisions. What I am wondering is how to improve the STORY. I was hoping to make it a 10 minute short but I guess I could change the length if it improves the final screenplay.
I have "some" ideas but worry it would take away from the simple story I have created. I have a tendency to add too much fluff, especially in my dialogue. I really value the breadth of knowledge on this forum so any feedback would be amazing.
Also, some suggestions for a cool Logline or better Title are welcome!
I am writing an original short story and would love some feedback. I know the formatting needs work, and the scenes are misplaced in places, but I will fix that in future revisions. What I am wondering is how to improve the STORY. I was hoping to make it a 10 minute short but I guess I could change the length if it improves the final screenplay.
I have "some" ideas but worry it would take away from the simple story I have created. I have a tendency to add too much fluff, especially in my dialogue. I really value the breadth of knowledge on this forum so any feedback would be amazing.
Also, some suggestions for a cool Logline or better Title are welcome!
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