Hey guys,
So I'm still working on this movie I've been planning for 6 months and so far it's gaining a lot of steam. Making a lot of good connections, getting a lot of people excited, etc. However, now we're at a point where we need to develop a nice ten minute promo for the Kickstarter ad we're going to use to generate some money.
Is this an interesting promo that would prompt others who are interested in the genre to support it?
_____________________________________________________________________________________
QUICK NEWS FOOTAGE OF CHAOS AROUND THE WORLD
CUT TO CREDITS
RICK (V.O)
(chuckle)
These people...
CUT TO:
INT. RICK’S CAR – DAY
(A) ECU ON RICK’S MOUTH
RICK
…These people, man.
CUT TO:
QUICK NEWS FOOTAGE OF CHAOS AROUND THE WORLD
CUT TO CREDITS
RICK (V.O)
They’re sheltered…
CUT TO:
INT. RICK’S CAR – DAY
(A) ECU ON GUN IN RICK’S LAP AS HE LOADS IT
RICK
…Every one of em.
CUT TO:
SHOTS OF NEWS ANCHORS TALKING ALL AT ONCE, AS THEY COVER THE SAME PIECE
NEWS ANCHOR #1
Many are claiming that this is the end of the World.
NEWS ANCHOR #2
There’s just total anarchy in the streets.
CUT TO CREDITS:
RICK (V.O)
It’s not their fault, really.
INT. RICK’S CAR – DAY
(A) ECU ON EYES LOOKING OUT THE WINDOW
RICK
They were just raised right.
CUT TO:
QUICK NEWS FOOTAGE OF CHAOS
NEWS ANCHOR #3
People are committing mass suicide.
NEWS ANCHOR #4
It’s unbelievable how large this thing is growing.
CUT TO CREDITS
RICK (V.O)
But bein raised right doesn’t teach you about the world and how cruel it can be.
INT. RICK’S CAR – DAY
(A) ECU ON ANOTHER MAN WITH A HATCHET, he nervously taps it.
RICK
It makes ya un-prepared.
CUT TO NEWS FOOTAGE COVERING THE CHAOS ON THE STREETS
NEWS ANCHOR #1
Shots are being fired from the white house.
NEWS ANCHOR #3
There’s no end in sight
INT. RICK’S CAR – DAY
(A) ECU ON BARREL OF GUN NEXT TO RICK’S MOUTH. CAMERA SLOWLY MOVES OUT TO SHOW TWO MEN SITTING IN A CAR IN A SUBURBAN NEIGHBORHOOD. They listen to the news feed about the portal, as RICK inspects his gun. WILL, who is holding a hatchet, stares up in the sky.
RICK
Yer mind’s all warped into believing that everythins safe. But when the sky opens up and everyone knows they’re dyin, ain’t nothing safe no more. And the people…
Rick turns to Will.
RICK
Well, they finally open up and show their true colors…Hey. You listenin to me?
Rick turns back and continues loading the gun.
RICK
Get your head outta the gutter. And turn that shit off. I’m tired of hearin about that blue piece a shit in the sky.
WILL
You aint curious about it?
RICK
Curious?
(C) CUT TO RICK,
RICK (light chuckle)
Now, that’s what’ll get ya killed. Na, the only thing we gotta be focusin on is livin.
WILL (turns to Rick)
For now.
RICK
Boy, you don’t know that…Shit, for all we know it’s a welcomin party from God. Ain’t nobody knows what that thing is.
Rick turns to look out at the houses.
RICK
And while the whole World goes around screamin, here we are…Gettin ready for another day.
(D) POV OF RICK, you see rows of houses and a car sitting in a yard. Next to the car is a dead body lying on the grass. Plumes of smoke can be seen in the distance.
RICK
None of these people see a future, Will. But, what if there is one? I mean, what if we go on livin?
(E) ECU ON RICK
RICK
Shouldn’t we prepare for that?
(F) ECU ON WILL, he nods in agreement.
(G) Rick turns to look out once more as he puts a loaded magazine in the gun. He cocks it back before turning back.
RICK
…Alright, you ready?
CUT TO:
EXT. OUTSIDE RICK’S CAR – DAY
(A) RICK and WILL exit the car and slowly make their way toward the house. Rick looks both ways as they cross the street, while Will stares up at the sky, mesmerized by A LARGE SUPER NOVA-LIKE PORTAL hanging above them.
INT. SORIN’S HOUSE – DAY
(F) ECU ON T.V,
NEWS ANCHOR
And now for the first time, NASA is ready to disclose everything they know to the public.
(G) The front door is smashed open. Two looters with backpacks rush into Sorin’s house. One of them wields a hatchet while the other holds a pistol.
(I) The two looters hear the television as they make their way around the hallway toward the living room. They stop when they reach the room, scanning the area.
RICK
All right, lets be quick.
(J) The looters begin digging around, looking for valuables.
(L) ECU ON T.V,
NEWS ANCHOR
Alright ladies and gentlemen. The moment we’ve been waiting for. Lets go live to the Press Room.
The screen cuts over to a pressroom showered with camera flashes. An old man with glasses stands at the podium next to several men in business suits.
DR. ERNHEIST
Ladies and Gentlemen. I’ll get straight to the point.
(M) The two looters ignore the T.V, pilfering through Sorin’s belongings.
DR. ERNHEIST
What we’re dealing with here is..un-natural. It cannot be rationalized.
(N) ECU on T.V
DR. ERNHEIST
The anomaly technically doesn’t exist, yet its growing bigger everyday.
(O) The looter with the gun makes his way over to Sorin’s bedroom.
(P) He stops by the door and looks around for a moment before continuing on. In the foreground, you see the box that Sorin stored his gun in. It’s wide open and empty inside.
Dr. ERNHESIT
We can’t even see it through any scientific instrumentation.
(Q) ECU ON SORIN PEERING THROUGH THE CLOSTET DOOR. CAMERA MOVES DOWN TO SHOW GUN IN HAND.
DR. ERNHEIST
Camera, photo multipliers, radio telescopes. None of them work because it doesn’t even emit energy.
(R) POV, Sorin watches the looter pilfer around.
DR. ERNHEIST
To be frank..it’s an absolute mystery that we’re able to see it right now.
(S) The looter turns around and scans the area.
(T) POV OF LOOTER, he stops when he sees the closet door.
(U) ECU ON LOOTERS EYES, they widen.
(V) ECU ON OUTSIDE OF CLOSET, The looter sees Sorin’s eye peering through the crack.
DR. ERNHEIST
And Even more startling is that no other animal in the kingdom can see it…Only us.
(W) POV OF SORIN, he can see the looter staring right at him. The looter quickly approaches him.
DR. ERNHEIST
Sigh..I’m not going pretend to know what this is or where it came from.
(X) Sorin moves back and readies his gun.
DR. ERNHEIST
…because with everything we know about the universe…
(Y) The looter opens the closet. Sorin quickly jumps up and points his gun at him before he has a chance to draw his.
DR. ERNHEIST
…there’s nothing that can explain this phenomenon.
(Z) Both of them stand there, frozen.
(AA) ECU ON T.V,
REPORTER
Do you think the World is ending?
DR. ERNHEIST
(Distressed)
…I don’t know…
(AB) CU ON LOOTER AND SORIN,
DR. ERNHEIST
…I don’t know.
(AC) Suddenly, the other looter bursts through the door.
WILL
Come on man, what’s…
He immediately freezes in step, wishing he hadn’t opened that door. Everyone remains silent for a moment.
RICK
(glances at buddy for second)
All right. Lets just ease up for a moment. We didn’t know anyone was home. You know what it’s like out there now...Things are scarce and whatnot. Look, just lower your weapon. We’re not here to hurt anyone.
SORIN
Yeah? Then, why do you have a gun?
RICK
Why do you? It’s for protection, that’s all. So, lets just ease up and talk this out… You know, we might have somethin you want. Maybe, we could trade.
(AD) While Sorin stands there contemplating what to do the other looter slowly tries to ambush him.
RICK
Whadya say?
Sorin notices the other looter walking closer to him, and points the gun at the man.
(AE) The other looter sees this as an opportunity and raises his firearm.
(AF) Within the nick of time, Sorin swings around and shoots him in the head. WILL is mortified that his friend was shot.
WILL
No! No! No! No! No! No! Rick!!
(AG) Bursting with tears, the looter rushes toward his friend as Sorin lowers his gun.
(AH) Curessing his head, Will whispers to his friend that he’ll be ok.
ECU ON SORIN, he stares at them wide-eyed, not fully sure what to do.
ECU ON WILL, as tears roll down his cheeks, he continues to try and comfort himself by whispering that it’ll be alright. All of the sudden, you hear a “bang”. Will falls out of frame. You see Sorin standing there with a smoking gun.
The camera moves closer to Sorin as he drops the gun in shear horror. He backs up into the closet and collapses.
(AS) He lays his back against the bottom of the wall as he stares out at the dead bodies. His eyes are half watered as he is so emotionally paralyzed, he doesn’t know what to do next.
(AT) After a few moments, Sorin looks down and takes out the photo of him and his grandfather standing by the mountain overlook.
(AU) Sorin picks a bag up that sits in the corner.
(AV) He slowly makes his way to the front door. The picture hangs outside the front part of his pack.
CUT TO:
(14) EXT. OUTSIDE SORIN’S HOUSE - MORNING
(A) Sorin throws the bag in the trunk of his car.
(B) The young man sits in the driver’s seat as he starts the engine.
(C) He drives off. CAMERA PANS UP to show the large portal hanging in the sky.
CUT TO BLACK
ROLL CREDITS
So I'm still working on this movie I've been planning for 6 months and so far it's gaining a lot of steam. Making a lot of good connections, getting a lot of people excited, etc. However, now we're at a point where we need to develop a nice ten minute promo for the Kickstarter ad we're going to use to generate some money.
Is this an interesting promo that would prompt others who are interested in the genre to support it?
_____________________________________________________________________________________
QUICK NEWS FOOTAGE OF CHAOS AROUND THE WORLD
CUT TO CREDITS
RICK (V.O)
(chuckle)
These people...
CUT TO:
INT. RICK’S CAR – DAY
(A) ECU ON RICK’S MOUTH
RICK
…These people, man.
CUT TO:
QUICK NEWS FOOTAGE OF CHAOS AROUND THE WORLD
CUT TO CREDITS
RICK (V.O)
They’re sheltered…
CUT TO:
INT. RICK’S CAR – DAY
(A) ECU ON GUN IN RICK’S LAP AS HE LOADS IT
RICK
…Every one of em.
CUT TO:
SHOTS OF NEWS ANCHORS TALKING ALL AT ONCE, AS THEY COVER THE SAME PIECE
NEWS ANCHOR #1
Many are claiming that this is the end of the World.
NEWS ANCHOR #2
There’s just total anarchy in the streets.
CUT TO CREDITS:
RICK (V.O)
It’s not their fault, really.
INT. RICK’S CAR – DAY
(A) ECU ON EYES LOOKING OUT THE WINDOW
RICK
They were just raised right.
CUT TO:
QUICK NEWS FOOTAGE OF CHAOS
NEWS ANCHOR #3
People are committing mass suicide.
NEWS ANCHOR #4
It’s unbelievable how large this thing is growing.
CUT TO CREDITS
RICK (V.O)
But bein raised right doesn’t teach you about the world and how cruel it can be.
INT. RICK’S CAR – DAY
(A) ECU ON ANOTHER MAN WITH A HATCHET, he nervously taps it.
RICK
It makes ya un-prepared.
CUT TO NEWS FOOTAGE COVERING THE CHAOS ON THE STREETS
NEWS ANCHOR #1
Shots are being fired from the white house.
NEWS ANCHOR #3
There’s no end in sight
INT. RICK’S CAR – DAY
(A) ECU ON BARREL OF GUN NEXT TO RICK’S MOUTH. CAMERA SLOWLY MOVES OUT TO SHOW TWO MEN SITTING IN A CAR IN A SUBURBAN NEIGHBORHOOD. They listen to the news feed about the portal, as RICK inspects his gun. WILL, who is holding a hatchet, stares up in the sky.
RICK
Yer mind’s all warped into believing that everythins safe. But when the sky opens up and everyone knows they’re dyin, ain’t nothing safe no more. And the people…
Rick turns to Will.
RICK
Well, they finally open up and show their true colors…Hey. You listenin to me?
Rick turns back and continues loading the gun.
RICK
Get your head outta the gutter. And turn that shit off. I’m tired of hearin about that blue piece a shit in the sky.
WILL
You aint curious about it?
RICK
Curious?
(C) CUT TO RICK,
RICK (light chuckle)
Now, that’s what’ll get ya killed. Na, the only thing we gotta be focusin on is livin.
WILL (turns to Rick)
For now.
RICK
Boy, you don’t know that…Shit, for all we know it’s a welcomin party from God. Ain’t nobody knows what that thing is.
Rick turns to look out at the houses.
RICK
And while the whole World goes around screamin, here we are…Gettin ready for another day.
(D) POV OF RICK, you see rows of houses and a car sitting in a yard. Next to the car is a dead body lying on the grass. Plumes of smoke can be seen in the distance.
RICK
None of these people see a future, Will. But, what if there is one? I mean, what if we go on livin?
(E) ECU ON RICK
RICK
Shouldn’t we prepare for that?
(F) ECU ON WILL, he nods in agreement.
(G) Rick turns to look out once more as he puts a loaded magazine in the gun. He cocks it back before turning back.
RICK
…Alright, you ready?
CUT TO:
EXT. OUTSIDE RICK’S CAR – DAY
(A) RICK and WILL exit the car and slowly make their way toward the house. Rick looks both ways as they cross the street, while Will stares up at the sky, mesmerized by A LARGE SUPER NOVA-LIKE PORTAL hanging above them.
INT. SORIN’S HOUSE – DAY
(F) ECU ON T.V,
NEWS ANCHOR
And now for the first time, NASA is ready to disclose everything they know to the public.
(G) The front door is smashed open. Two looters with backpacks rush into Sorin’s house. One of them wields a hatchet while the other holds a pistol.
(I) The two looters hear the television as they make their way around the hallway toward the living room. They stop when they reach the room, scanning the area.
RICK
All right, lets be quick.
(J) The looters begin digging around, looking for valuables.
(L) ECU ON T.V,
NEWS ANCHOR
Alright ladies and gentlemen. The moment we’ve been waiting for. Lets go live to the Press Room.
The screen cuts over to a pressroom showered with camera flashes. An old man with glasses stands at the podium next to several men in business suits.
DR. ERNHEIST
Ladies and Gentlemen. I’ll get straight to the point.
(M) The two looters ignore the T.V, pilfering through Sorin’s belongings.
DR. ERNHEIST
What we’re dealing with here is..un-natural. It cannot be rationalized.
(N) ECU on T.V
DR. ERNHEIST
The anomaly technically doesn’t exist, yet its growing bigger everyday.
(O) The looter with the gun makes his way over to Sorin’s bedroom.
(P) He stops by the door and looks around for a moment before continuing on. In the foreground, you see the box that Sorin stored his gun in. It’s wide open and empty inside.
Dr. ERNHESIT
We can’t even see it through any scientific instrumentation.
(Q) ECU ON SORIN PEERING THROUGH THE CLOSTET DOOR. CAMERA MOVES DOWN TO SHOW GUN IN HAND.
DR. ERNHEIST
Camera, photo multipliers, radio telescopes. None of them work because it doesn’t even emit energy.
(R) POV, Sorin watches the looter pilfer around.
DR. ERNHEIST
To be frank..it’s an absolute mystery that we’re able to see it right now.
(S) The looter turns around and scans the area.
(T) POV OF LOOTER, he stops when he sees the closet door.
(U) ECU ON LOOTERS EYES, they widen.
(V) ECU ON OUTSIDE OF CLOSET, The looter sees Sorin’s eye peering through the crack.
DR. ERNHEIST
And Even more startling is that no other animal in the kingdom can see it…Only us.
(W) POV OF SORIN, he can see the looter staring right at him. The looter quickly approaches him.
DR. ERNHEIST
Sigh..I’m not going pretend to know what this is or where it came from.
(X) Sorin moves back and readies his gun.
DR. ERNHEIST
…because with everything we know about the universe…
(Y) The looter opens the closet. Sorin quickly jumps up and points his gun at him before he has a chance to draw his.
DR. ERNHEIST
…there’s nothing that can explain this phenomenon.
(Z) Both of them stand there, frozen.
(AA) ECU ON T.V,
REPORTER
Do you think the World is ending?
DR. ERNHEIST
(Distressed)
…I don’t know…
(AB) CU ON LOOTER AND SORIN,
DR. ERNHEIST
…I don’t know.
(AC) Suddenly, the other looter bursts through the door.
WILL
Come on man, what’s…
He immediately freezes in step, wishing he hadn’t opened that door. Everyone remains silent for a moment.
RICK
(glances at buddy for second)
All right. Lets just ease up for a moment. We didn’t know anyone was home. You know what it’s like out there now...Things are scarce and whatnot. Look, just lower your weapon. We’re not here to hurt anyone.
SORIN
Yeah? Then, why do you have a gun?
RICK
Why do you? It’s for protection, that’s all. So, lets just ease up and talk this out… You know, we might have somethin you want. Maybe, we could trade.
(AD) While Sorin stands there contemplating what to do the other looter slowly tries to ambush him.
RICK
Whadya say?
Sorin notices the other looter walking closer to him, and points the gun at the man.
(AE) The other looter sees this as an opportunity and raises his firearm.
(AF) Within the nick of time, Sorin swings around and shoots him in the head. WILL is mortified that his friend was shot.
WILL
No! No! No! No! No! No! Rick!!
(AG) Bursting with tears, the looter rushes toward his friend as Sorin lowers his gun.
(AH) Curessing his head, Will whispers to his friend that he’ll be ok.
ECU ON SORIN, he stares at them wide-eyed, not fully sure what to do.
ECU ON WILL, as tears roll down his cheeks, he continues to try and comfort himself by whispering that it’ll be alright. All of the sudden, you hear a “bang”. Will falls out of frame. You see Sorin standing there with a smoking gun.
The camera moves closer to Sorin as he drops the gun in shear horror. He backs up into the closet and collapses.
(AS) He lays his back against the bottom of the wall as he stares out at the dead bodies. His eyes are half watered as he is so emotionally paralyzed, he doesn’t know what to do next.
(AT) After a few moments, Sorin looks down and takes out the photo of him and his grandfather standing by the mountain overlook.
(AU) Sorin picks a bag up that sits in the corner.
(AV) He slowly makes his way to the front door. The picture hangs outside the front part of his pack.
CUT TO:
(14) EXT. OUTSIDE SORIN’S HOUSE - MORNING
(A) Sorin throws the bag in the trunk of his car.
(B) The young man sits in the driver’s seat as he starts the engine.
(C) He drives off. CAMERA PANS UP to show the large portal hanging in the sky.
CUT TO BLACK
ROLL CREDITS
