story Help with unique story about addiction

[causeandeffect]

Im an 18 year old aspiring filmmaker making a short film around 10 minutes long or under. My teacher reccomended picking a subject we feel passionately about, I aim to really raise the bar with this project by undertaking proffesionally from all angles. After struggling to think of anything I truely loved enough to create, I watched a short Korean film about a man with a cocaine addiction and its effect on his relationship.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ry7dBSWoyBI

Addiction is quite a generic topic, and the majority of films (particularly student films) about addiction are a bore, always the same rehashed cliche's and I find myself clawing my eyeballs at the sight of suicidal endings. However Alcohol addiction is something I am more than familiar with, having been a victim of it since birth, my dad is a recovering addict who was at deaths door on life support two years ago, so as far as picking a topic im passionate and knowledgable on it seems the perfect fit.

I have had an idea to shoot a story about an addict and his girlfriend (im not sure what that story is atm but it will be something simple like the short I linked above) with narration by the protagonist who is speaking of his love, and the affect his "love" has on him. We are unsure whether he is speaking of his girlfriend or alcohol addiction and its grip on him, until the end when the camera cuts to him speaking in a recovery group where the narration was coming from. I dont know if it is possible to write a script vague enough to describe a relationship with it actually being a methaphor of his addiction, is it doable? any suggestions?

I am also not a fan or linear storytelling in all short films, I loved the Korean short because it involved flashbacks and the idea the girlfriend was dead. It made it interesting. I aim for it to be a hard-hitting film like Steve Mcqueens "hunger" or "shame". So any help/ideas for a story would be appreciated and a credit rightfully due, I am still learning this craft, if this idea was a sandwitch is has no filling atm lol

 

[Zj81mil]

(Below)

 

[Zj81mil]

the weight of an addiction is a nightmare. If you want to raise the bar, tell the story in a short hand style (keeping the pace a little quicker) and focus on the present day element of the character trying to live life after giving up or rather trying to run from it. All the other aspects of the story could showcase one way or another how his or her world is driving them towards falling back into the abyss of subjugation of their addiction, but the relationship is what keep them strong to stay away (never shying away from the struggle)

The flashback elements could be showcased as such:

INT. HOME- NIGHT

CHARACTER sits on the COUCH with SIGNIFICANT OTHER (male/ female), cuddled as they watch TV. The PHONE rings. He/she picks it up and answers.

CHARACTER
Yeah....?

VOICE ON THE PHONE
I'm headin' to that spot... you wanna roll?

Character sits up and sighs. Frustrated of the proposal rests (his/her) head in (his/her) hand.

INSERT IMAGES: CHARACTER WILDLY (DRUNKENLY) DANCING WITH OTHERS. SNORTING A LINE WITH A GROUP OF PEOPLE IN THE BACKGROUND CHEERING (HIM/HER) ON. THROWING BACK SHOTS WITH A GROUP OF DEVIOUS LOOKING PEOPLE. CHARACTER ON THE GROUND (OUTSIDE- UNKNOWN LOCATION) UNCONSCIOUS- HAD TOO MUCH.

CHARACTER
I can't.... I....

VOICE ON THE PHONE
C'mon... you know we can only get in it with you!

CHARACTER
I'm not in it anymore... you know that

Significant other leans forward and rubs (his/her) back. Leans towards ear.

SIGNIF OTHER
(whispering in ear)
Don't let them bring you back down. You're stronger than that!

Mood is growing intense. Character stands and walks to the window. Takes a deep breath and puts
the phone back to (his/her ear)

CHARACTER
You know I shouldn't.... remember what happened
last time... I made a d@*$ fool of myself!

VOICE ON THE PHONE
Are you kidding me? That's not what I remember.... Remember
How alive were were... how free you were? Remember who you met that night...?

Character is caught in a memory of what happened.

CUT TO:

(FLASHBACK)




you get the idea... anyways.... you can tell the back story and bring it back to the present through the phone conversation. Conclusion would be how that conversation ends. If Character falls back to old habits or if the relationship proves to be the stronger place in Character's heart.

I think you're onto something good. And if you can take another angle or perspective of something done before but from a dif POV it will give a fresh take on something. Great that you dont want to end it with suicide. I agree. Much more weight if the character can find a way to get over/past the weight of what has demoralized them.

Hope this helps some...

 

[ChimpPhobiaFilms]

Start the story with the character in his real life, and let him slip into the fantasy world as the story progresses.

EX. The character could be going through his daily life, and then his descent into his addiction. Perhaps the character begins to go to his "happy" place occasionally, and we begin to enter this world more and more as the story goes on. But by the end, we are completely immersed in the world of the damaged character. Perhaps by the end, the world he is living in becomes bland and dull, lifeless and boring. He sits there still, unmoving.