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watch Flowers Tomorrow - Short Drama

P

pmiddy001

Title: Flowers Tomorrow
Running Time: 9.30m
Cast: Jem Dobbs, Kuki Keaton and Viki Bailey
Genre: Drama
Synopsis: A stranger attempts to save the relationship of a young couple

flowerstomorrowposterv2small.jpg


See Film Here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uo69MRkg8QU

Writer, Director: Aidey Pugh
Producer: Pete Middleton

Kindest Regards,
Pete Middleton Pictures
 
I thought that was a charming story, and the acting was very solid.

There were some issues though, as you are probably aware. The audio was pretty terrible--it sounded like they were talking in a tin shed. I'm not sure where your boom placement was, but it was picking up too much echo from the bus stop shelter. Also, a lot of the incidental noise could have been toned down...feet on rocks, sitting down, crackling of the plastic wrapper of the flowers...it was all too...crackly and poppy.

I also thought some of the early camera work was dodgy. I guess you didn't have another shot to cut to, but that jerky handheld bit in the beginning could have been cut, or should have been cut I should say. It was way too jerky for that one shot in particular. That brought me out of the movie completely, and then I started to pay attention to the hand-held work.

Also, I wouldn't have had the actors lean up against the plastic backing of the bus stop. It caused a wavering reflection everytime they shifted in their seats (which happened a lot). There is constantly a distortion behind them, and it was distracting.

Other than that...the rest looked pretty good. And like I said the story and acting was solid.

Kudos. Nice work. Keep it up.
 
Great story, great acting. I noticed the same audio issues as M1chae1 pointed out, but they didn't bother me quite as much.

BTW, I knew as soon as the man sat down what was coming. It was the proper ending, but just inevitable enough that I knew immediately where it was headed. Personally, though, I would've had the girl leave in the beginning, the boy accept the flowers, the man leave, the boy catch the bus and, through the window as the bus drives past, see the man talking to his wife. The fact that the couple just sort of goes off without a care in the world, coupled with the girl thoughtlessly dropping the flowers in the road made the two of them seem shallow and unlikeable. The boy seemed a bit too self-absorbed for mere words to change him, but if he saw first-hand the man's situation he might be more likely to be moved by it.

Just my opinion, fwiw. Very nice film.
 
2001 Productions said:
Great story, great acting. I noticed the same audio issues as M1chae1 pointed out, but they didn't bother me quite as much.

BTW, I knew as soon as the man sat down what was coming. It was the proper ending, but just inevitable enough that I knew immediately where it was headed. Personally, though, I would've had the girl leave in the beginning, the boy accept the flowers, the man leave, the boy catch the bus and, through the window as the bus drives past, see the man talking to his wife. The fact that the couple just sort of goes off without a care in the world, coupled with the girl thoughtlessly dropping the flowers in the road made the two of them seem shallow and unlikeable. The boy seemed a bit too self-absorbed for mere words to change him, but if he saw first-hand the man's situation he might be more likely to be moved by it.

Just my opinion, fwiw. Very nice film.
Click to expand...

I agree, the kids seemed shallow. Dropping the flowers was a strong choice...one that I'm pretty sure I wouldn't have gone with.

And I also agree that I knew what was coming as soon as the film started. I did like, however, that the flowers were for his dead wife--although, when he said, 'I'm going to see her now...', I knew where it was going...which is fine.
 
Thank you all very much for your input.
I didn't write or direct the film, I simply did everything else except act! There was an issue raised about the camera movement during the first part of the conversation and I would have switched to a better camera shot if I had captured one. It was below freezing and I didn't want the main actor to lose patience and leave us with an incompleted film. But I take full responsibility because it was totally and utterly my fault and it niggles me everytime I see it. - Although, The Bourne Supremacy was unwatchable! - and before you ask, yes I hated it due to the cameraman!
A couple of points raised about the girl dropping the flowers. I personally liked this as it showed how the typical "kids of today" would act, bringing us back down to earth after we've sat through 6 minutes of dialogue from a previous generation. Just my point - not my screenplay!
Thank you all again for your input!
Kindest Regards,
Pete Middleton
 
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