watch First Short Film - The City

[ChrisDRob]

Was given a University task to make a 3 minute short silent film, only natural light could be used, none or one character, and it had to be inspired by the given title 'THE CITY'. I'm looking for feedback so that my next one can be better. Be harsh, please! seriously make me want to commit suicide with your harshness

 

[ChrisDRob]

I guess you'll want the video link too:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=clij1Ho6J9Y&feature=plcp

cheers

 

[baoliun]

Well. One major question why did you put an actor in the frame? Are u telling a story? Or just scenery?
As a viewer i didnt get that. Did you write a script for this video? What was your idea?

 

[Rowan93]

Firstly I love the visuals and they go very well with the music, personally I wouldn't have used so many shots at so many angles but that's probably just me ... I don't know if you used a storyboard but you can choose what shots you wanna put in and take out before shooting rather than leaving it up to the shoot (obviously).
Also I'd say it's much more of a music video than a short film, you should include some diegesis, or storyline which works with the lyrics. There should have been some reason for the man's loneliness, because that wasn't explained, and some ending to tie it all together.

 

[Scorer]

Well. One major question why did you put an actor in the frame? Are u telling a story? Or just scenery?
As a viewer i didnt get that. Did you write a script for this video? What was your idea?

I agree here. I may be wrong but I got the impression that you were just kind of showing the life of a busy city. If that's the case I don't understand the actors purpose. If there is a character there should be a story to tell, and whether you tried to or not, I didn't see any sort of story there, just a guy in a suit strolling around aimlessly and looking at his watch.

 

[simondo]

I would put this down as experimental, i liked it, some of the shots looked great