First script and i would really like some feedback

[Screenwrite]

This is the first script I've ever written and i would really like some constructive criticism.



https://drive.google.com/file/d/0B5tQGbKgAG5ZRVNJZWlRM3k3ekU/view?usp=sharing

 

[Cracker Funk]

Hey, welcome to IT! Thanks for sharing your first work with us. I know that that is daring to do. I do think you need some work to do on this one.

Well that was macabre. Holy shit, that's the whole story?! I think you need to go hug your mom, cuz that right there is one of the most misogynist screenplays I've ever read. Also, there's no story. This is a monologue.

 

[Quality]

Too short, and remember, grammar is everything.