archived-videos First attempt at creating holographic UI - criticism needed

[vkhu]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CQpdmzw6zrY

Aside from the completely broken English, wooden acting and non-existent plot, is there anything I can do to make this effect better? If you find something a bit off putting but unsure of how to fix it, just tell me what you think seems out of place and I will try to work around that.

Note: My equipment are probably medieval compare to what you guys have so please excuse the low video quality. If you have any cinematography tips to improve it, be it lighting or camera angle or anything, please share it.

 

[Duckforceone]

looks good..

too much light on the flare at the bottom, it hits your arm, and makes it light up even more, making me lose focus...

music too loud, it almost at times overshadows your talking..

but awesome work...

 

[vkhu]

looks good..

too much light on the flare at the bottom, it hits your arm, and makes it light up even more, making me lose focus...

music too loud, it almost at times overshadows your talking..

but awesome work...

Thanks for the feedback man . The loud music was due to the fact that there were some static noises the camera picked up (no idea how it could get like that. I shot that at 2 A.M with every electronic devices turned off). Have to distract the viewer somehow.

But yeah, the len flare was probably too bright. Thanks.

And btw, how do you think about the audio? does the AI sound robotic/computeristic(?) enough? And does my English still understandable? How about the background noise?

 

[Duckforceone]

computer voice is good... need to be a bit clearer at times, with more distinction on the words...

your voice is so low, it's often drowned out in the music and noise... having trouble following what you are saying... so can't comment on your pronounciation...