archived-videos DATE (Danish shortfilm with subtitles)

[Asker]

Hey guys.

This is my second shortfilm and my third video production. It is a comedy short about a guy who has grown a pimple just before his dream date.

I don't have much gear, so I had to shoot under the circumstances using my Canon t2i, standard lens, 50mm f/1.8 lens, a tripod and a monopod. It is a no budget film, hence I did everything besides the acting. It was a fun experience, and I can't wait to produce more in the future!

Hope you like it - ANY constructive feedback is welcome.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H6BQyeisnTw

 

[ChimpPhobiaFilms]

Nice work! I liked it, but there were a few things that bothered me.

Very slow. Faster editing, cut scenes, and shorten it. Also, speed the pacing up. The zoom shot at the beginning was very jerky. Practice zooming smoothly, stabilize it in post, or get a better zoom. A couple of shots were over/underexposed. Remember to light scenes and properly set exposure and ISO. The attempted pimple popping looked bad. There was too much skin in between the fingers and the pimple. Instruct your actor better, and/or get a makeup artist. The beginning was too long. You could probably cut most of it out, and start with a phone call. Or just speed it up by editing out unnecessary shots and scenes. Much of the film feels padded out. Take out the filler! Some really out of focus shots. Watch your LCD screen closely, and practice focusing. Go around your house, and film around. Shoot random shots, focusing from one object to another. I practiced by using three red cups, and having someone call out numbers, and I'd either focus to the first, second, or third. Try something like that out. If the screen is too small, consider investing in an external monitor or viewfinder attachment. You could also do a DIY build. Google is your friend. It would be nice to have something else besides music and a bit of dialogue. Perhaps some foley and sound effects? There are people on this forum that are probably willing to work for free or cheap. Wasn't very exciting or interesting really. I felt like it was leading to something... and nothing happened.

Some really great images! The cinematography and music overall is fantastic! The direction and concept is good as well.

Good job

 

[Asker]

Nice work! I liked it, but there were a few things that bothered me.

Very slow. Faster editing, cut scenes, and shorten it. Also, speed the pacing up. The zoom shot at the beginning was very jerky. Practice zooming smoothly, stabilize it in post, or get a better zoom. A couple of shots were over/underexposed. Remember to light scenes and properly set exposure and ISO. The attempted pimple popping looked bad. There was too much skin in between the fingers and the pimple. Instruct your actor better, and/or get a makeup artist. The beginning was too long. You could probably cut most of it out, and start with a phone call. Or just speed it up by editing out unnecessary shots and scenes. Much of the film feels padded out. Take out the filler! Some really out of focus shots. Watch your LCD screen closely, and practice focusing. Go around your house, and film around. Shoot random shots, focusing from one object to another. I practiced by using three red cups, and having someone call out numbers, and I'd either focus to the first, second, or third. Try something like that out. If the screen is too small, consider investing in an external monitor or viewfinder attachment. You could also do a DIY build. Google is your friend. It would be nice to have something else besides music and a bit of dialogue. Perhaps some foley and sound effects? There are people on this forum that are probably willing to work for free or cheap. Wasn't very exciting or interesting really. I felt like it was leading to something... and nothing happened.

Some really great images! The cinematography and music overall is fantastic! The direction and concept is good as well.

Good job

Thanks for your constructive reply - much appreciated. As mentioned this is my second shortfilm and third production, so you are indeed right about the fact that I need more practice at exposing and using the focus. However, I like to clear out that I would encourage everyone to make films no matter the budget or gear. Same goes for me - I didn't have much of a choice about the zooming at the beginning. I even asked on this forum, but nothing could work out on the carpet. So I decided to use a zoom effect, and I agree it was a little too long. The length of that clip was more likely suitable for a feature. Faster editing? Hmm. I was focused on getting that one right. Darn! Even when you mention it, I kinda feel it's already fast. Care to elaborate?

I live in Denmark and not many people here are from Denmark. I'd like to work with more experienced people, but right now I'm trying to learn the basics and fundamental part of filmmaking by exploring every aspect (that includes acting too). I've no lighting gear, and I think I'd rather get the basics right before learning lighting, which seems kind of advanced for me at the moment. Also, not saying I need to learn to do makeup though (hehe), but I thought it would be unnecessary and a little rude to ask a makeup artist to stay around the house for 4 days (we filmed 2 hours x 4 days) and work for free.

Personally, I think that sound effects and too much dialogue can get quite cheesy at points. My intention behind this film was to show a funny scenario that many people can relate to (preparing for a date and something goes wrong), but yet also as a message for people to relax and be themselves. I mean, this guy, he missed his dreamdate because of what...a pimple? That's quite sad, but I know for a fact that these situations DO happen. It's even selfreflective to an extent. But once again, thanks for your comment, and I'm glad that you liked some aspects of the film.

 

[baoliun]

The main problem as Chimp noted is time issues. Short film should be SHORT. Each shot should be absolutely essential to the film and should tell a story. Imagine you cut out the master of the house and the sea shot. Will anything change? Will the whole structure of the film collapse? Nope. These shots add absolutely nothing to the film whatsoever. Well,at least they are aesthetically pleasant and fast. Next painful minute shows a lack of understanding of rudimentary cinematography.

Take a look at this. Whole scene 0:14 seconds!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wyKBSy6rgdY

This type of montage is pretty cliche nowadays but still,how fast and effective a flight is shown. How much info is packed in a extremely short time span.
You want it slower for your date film? Use multiple dissolves - tie fastening,shoe shining,hair gelling,shaving w/e.
Speaking of shaving:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N1T93rJ9p-s

The film is far from great,but look how poetic shot design and editing is. How many different angles are shown. How camera moves.


Now,structure wise.

The idea of this film is very "small" 2-3min maximum. There is no room to stretch it more,simply not enough material/interesting situations to play around with,which is clearly evident in your film. It seems you didn't think it through enough on the script/prep level as pretty much nothing interesting happens on screen.

A "cheesy" but more defined 3 act structure based on same idea would be more effective. I.e. guy tries to hide pimple,makes it really bad,almost gives up,goes to date nonetheless and sees a beautiful girl with a massive pimple.

Little things

Coca cola in the shot. No-no,unless they pay u ;p
Overacting everywhere. This is not theater.
Shaky,blurry footage.

Hope that helps!

 

[ChimpPhobiaFilms]

Thanks for your constructive reply - much appreciated. As mentioned this is my second shortfilm and third production, so you are indeed right about the fact that I need more practice at exposing and using the focus. However, I like to clear out that I would encourage everyone to make films no matter the budget or gear. Same goes for me - I didn't have much of a choice about the zooming at the beginning. I even asked on this forum, but nothing could work out on the carpet. So I decided to use a zoom effect, and I agree it was a little too long. The length of that clip was more likely suitable for a feature. Faster editing? Hmm. I was focused on getting that one right. Darn! Even when you mention it, I kinda feel it's already fast. Care to elaborate?

The film actually feels slow and lost my interest. Faster editing isn't the right term, I guess faster pacing would be a better way to say it. The film dragged on, and I got bored. Sorry if that sounds rough, I just got bored. I didn't like it. It started off interesting, and felt like it was leading up to something, and nothing happened. It just kind of... ended abruptly. And it was too long. You could have gotten rid of most shots and shortened it down to 2-3 minutes, and it would have been just as good - probably better.

I live in Denmark and not many people here are from Denmark. I'd like to work with more experienced people, but right now I'm trying to learn the basics and fundamental part of filmmaking by exploring every aspect (that includes acting too). I've no lighting gear, and I think I'd rather get the basics right before learning lighting, which seems kind of advanced for me at the moment. Also, not saying I need to learn to do makeup though (hehe), but I thought it would be unnecessary and a little rude to ask a makeup artist to stay around the house for 4 days (we filmed 2 hours x 4 days) and work for free.

You don't need great lighting gear. But open windows, and turn on all lights. You want the location to be as bright as possible so that when you shoot, you can turn your ISO down (less noise). You also don't want your shots to be too dark or too bright.

You don't need a make-up artist, but the actor's actions seemed very forced. I think the scene would improve greatly if you directed the actor well, maybe looked at clips for reference, studied up a bit on make-up, and/or showed the scene through sound or the character's expression. What I'm trying to say is that you didn't have to show it in graphic detail, you could use the character's expression, sound, and other elements to show what's going on.

Personally, I think that sound effects and too much dialogue can get quite cheesy at points. My intention behind this film was to show a funny scenario that many people can relate to (preparing for a date and something goes wrong), but yet also as a message for people to relax and be themselves. I mean, this guy, he missed his dreamdate because of what...a pimple? That's quite sad, but I know for a fact that these situations DO happen. It's even selfreflective to an extent. But once again, thanks for your comment, and I'm glad that you liked some aspects of the film.

Yes, dialogue and sound effects can get cheesy, especially in a short by a beginning filmmaker. But if you are going to be doing an all-music short, then you should pick the right music. I didn't like the music pick. Not fitting. Just my opinion.

I like your concept and your motivation behind making the film. A strong underlying theme is very important.

Can't wait to see the film. You obviously have talent, you just have to learn more about the filmmaking process, refine your skills, and become more knowledgeable in areas you are not.

Best of luck! I can't wait to see the next one

 

[Asker]

The film actually feels slow and lost my interest. Faster editing isn't the right term, I guess faster pacing would be a better way to say it. The film dragged on, and I got bored. Sorry if that sounds rough, I just got bored. I didn't like it. It started off interesting, and felt like it was leading up to something, and nothing happened. It just kind of... ended abruptly. And it was too long. You could have gotten rid of most shots and shortened it down to 2-3 minutes, and it would have been just as good - probably better.

You are right. I should have tried to make it a bit shorter, no doubt.

You don't need great lighting gear. But open windows, and turn on all lights. You want the location to be as bright as possible so that when you shoot, you can turn your ISO down (less noise). You also don't want your shots to be too dark or too bright.

I actually did open the windows and turn on all lights. Though, I didn't turn ISO all the way down at all times. Thanks for the tip.

You don't need a make-up artist, but the actor's actions seemed very forced. I think the scene would improve greatly if you directed the actor well, maybe looked at clips for reference, studied up a bit on make-up, and/or showed the scene through sound or the character's expression. What I'm trying to say is that you didn't have to show it in graphic detail, you could use the character's expression, sound, and other elements to show what's going on.

Please enlighten me on how to do this. I think my actor did a splendid job.

Yes, dialogue and sound effects can get cheesy, especially in a short by a beginning filmmaker. But if you are going to be doing an all-music short, then you should pick the right music. I didn't like the music pick. Not fitting. Just my opinion.

Yeah, music is always much influenced by opinions. Some like it and some don't. I had a lot of credit on the danish forums for the music part, and I spent a lot of time trying to find some music that would be a little "dramatic" while still fitting into a comedy.

I like your concept and your motivation behind making the film. A strong underlying theme is very important.

Can't wait to see the film. You obviously have talent, you just have to learn more about the filmmaking process, refine your skills, and become more knowledgeable in areas you are not.

Best of luck! I can't wait to see the next one

Thank you! My next project will be a short documentary about being old and staying happy, yet knowing you might be close to the end.

 

[Asker]

The main problem as Chimp noted is time issues. Short film should be SHORT. Each shot should be absolutely essential to the film and should tell a story. Imagine you cut out the master of the house and the sea shot. Will anything change? Will the whole structure of the film collapse? Nope. These shots add absolutely nothing to the film whatsoever. Well,at least they are aesthetically pleasant and fast. Next painful minute shows a lack of understanding of rudimentary cinematography.

Take a look at this. Whole scene 0:14 seconds!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wyKBSy6rgdY

This type of montage is pretty cliche nowadays but still,how fast and effective a flight is shown. How much info is packed in a extremely short time span.
You want it slower for your date film? Use multiple dissolves - tie fastening,shoe shining,hair gelling,shaving w/e.
Speaking of shaving:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N1T93rJ9p-s

The film is far from great,but look how poetic shot design and editing is. How many different angles are shown. How camera moves.


Now,structure wise.

The idea of this film is very "small" 2-3min maximum. There is no room to stretch it more,simply not enough material/interesting situations to play around with,which is clearly evident in your film. It seems you didn't think it through enough on the script/prep level as pretty much nothing interesting happens on screen.

A "cheesy" but more defined 3 act structure based on same idea would be more effective. I.e. guy tries to hide pimple,makes it really bad,almost gives up,goes to date nonetheless and sees a beautiful girl with a massive pimple.

Little things

Coca cola in the shot. No-no,unless they pay u ;p
Overacting everywhere. This is not theater.
Shaky,blurry footage.

Hope that helps!

I'm very pleased by your constructive feedback. I do agree that I could have cut out the first two clips, and they were definitely just aesthetically pleasant purpose. The intro clip was a little too long, but maybe you guys are also a little too harsh. I'm 19 and this was my second shortfilm and third production. I thought the intro (even though it was a little long) was a creative approach. I have seen Scorsese "The Big Shave", I thought it was brilliant, but not because of the cinematography. Using a lot of camera angles don't necessarily make it good. In fact, I tend to see a lot of newbies like me, who think that using many camera angles automatically makes it good, and then they completely overuse it.

Coca Cola in the shot? This was a no-budget, non-commercial, for fun and for the experience shortfilm. It was my little brother's room and he had it on his table, hence why it's there. Didn't find it necessary to remove it.

A "cheesy" but more defined 3 act structure based on same idea would be more effective. I.e. guy tries to hide pimple,makes it really bad,almost gives up,goes to date nonetheless and sees a beautiful girl with a massive pimple.

As mentioned earlier, I didn't want it to be like that. I didn't want a happy ending. The message was for people to relax and not care so much about their looks (because then they might miss the real opportunities in life such as the real love).

"Overacting everywhere". I personally thought the acting was great, and that overacting a little can be good for a comedy like this. However, I see where you are getting it from, and I wont deny it. It was the actor first acting experience ever, and it was my first time really directing an actor. I'm reading "Directing Actors" by Judith Weston which I used for this film though.

Thanks for your reply and feedback though. It is constructive after all.