Based on what I've read about them, I don't think Abbott should be the first avenue of approach for someone trying to shop a script.
I did decide to try them out, however, for my first feature I wrote a few years ago that hasn't been going anywhere anyways. It's a biopic and period piece with large crowds, trains, explosions, etc., so we're talking probably $20 million or more to produce. The pro consultants I sent it to thought it very well written, but pointed out there was no way in hell anyone was going to front that kind of money on a pic written by someone with no production credits. They suggested I put it in a drawer and wait until that day.
Anyways, I sent it to Abbott last month just to keep it in play and got my first (of three) covers posted on their website a few weeks ago. I've appended it at the end if anyone is interested in seeing how they rate scripts. They also asked me to send them a hard copy, which I did.
I don't expect much from it, but at least it's out there, and you never know when the right script will meet up with the right need.
-Charles
Abbott Cover:
Title: Tearing Things Loose
Writer: Charles Musser
Overall Grade:
4 / 5 Other Readers: --
MPAA Rating: R
Screenwriter Logline: At the turn of the century in the American West, young labor unions face off against the bosses of giant corporations in a fight for the soul of America; dirt poor, overworked and unable to feed their families, stymied by bought judges and corrupt politicians, workers turn in desperation to violence as radical union leader, “Big Bill” Haywood leads the way, until he is kidnapped by the Pinkertons and brought to trial, charged with blowing up the Governor of Idaho, and a young, relatively unknown lawyer by the name of Clarence Darrow arrives to wage a desperate struggle to save Haywood’s life.
Logline: A miner being oppressed by the mining company and the government takes action to protect his fellow workers but is targeted by enemies far more powerful than himself.
Screenplay Competition: Third in Wilson Wheaton International Screenwriting Competition
Screenplay Competition: Honorable Mention in Los Angeles Movie Awards
Screenplay Competition: Second Rounder in Austin Film Festival
Classifications: Character Driven, Film, Non-Fiction, Live Action, Mainstream (studio)
Genres: Bio-Pic, Drama, Period Piece, Western, Courtroom, Murder, Political
Pages: 120
# Locations: 30+
Time Period: 1850 - 1910
Locations: Utah farm, Colorado, Idaho
Budget: 20,000,000-50,000,000&50,000,000-100,000,000
Similar Films: Amadeus; A Beautiful Mind; The Last Emperor; Malcolm X
Synopsis: On December 30, 1905, the ex-Governor of Idaho, FRANK STUENENBERG is blown to smithereens in front of his horrified family. Thus begins a film that portrays one of the most bitter and brutal sagas of violence and class struggle in American history, and ends with the “Trial of the Century” of radical union leader, WILLIAM "BIG BILL" HAYWOOD, for murder.
A true story, and meticulously researched, we follow Haywood and his wife, NEVADA JANE, from their early homesteading days in Nevada, to Bill’s rise through the Western Federation of Miners Union and to its top leadership. Bill quickly becomes a legend for his quick fists, roughneck ways, big drinking, and powerful oratory. As the unions grow in strength, so the bosses of big business tighten their iron-fist grip on wages and working conditions, convinced that the threat of unionization must be destroyed forever in the United States.
We follow the devious and psychotic path of HARRY ORCHARD, an expert in dynamite, who singlehandedly blows up more public officials, governors, judges and scabs than any man in American history, and who claims to work for Haywood and the Western Federation of Miners. With Stuenenberg’s death, the bankers and mine owners see their opportunity to destroy the union, and they bring in one of the most legendary and colorful Pinkerton detectives in the West, JAMES MCPARLAND.
Conspiring with the mine-owners and the Governor of Idaho, McParland manages to kidnap Big Bill Haywood from Colorado and bring him to trial in Idaho for Governor Stuenenberg’s murder. Liberal labor groups from across the country, and around the world, denounce the kidnapping and the trial and Haywood becomes a world-famous cause célèbre. Hundreds of thousands march in his support from New York to Chicago to Los Angeles.
Enter a young and relatively unknown lawyer from Chicago, CLARENCE DARROW, who the union hires to fight for Haywood’s life. Darrow wages a brilliant and bitter struggle, as he is pitted against the best prosecuting attorneys that the mine owners’ money can buy. In one of the most remarkable closing arguments on record, Darrow narrowly manages to save Haywood’s life with a not-guilty verdict, and likely saves labor unions from utter destruction in the United States. This is the trial that catapults Darrow into the national limelight and his place as one of the greatest trial attorneys in history.
On the human side, a tender love story between Big Bill and his wife, Nevada Jane, turns tragic as Jane succumbs to crippling arthritis and both grow apart. Bill learns that his real family is his brothers and sisters in the movement toward a fair working wage for all people.
This is a big-budget picture, explosions, trains, multiple locations, period-piece sets, etc. But this story is magnificent in its scope, has never been told before, and will resonate with all Americans who see how Big Banks and Wall Street have won the struggle and what it means in their lives today.
Comments: OVERALL (4)
The premise and conflicts are timeless and relate-able. Every aspect of the three act structure is present and easily discernible. The dialogue is accurate to the time period and each character's speech pattern is distinct. Each character is a fully developed human being with attributes and flaws. Though the story is based on actual events, the style and presentation is original. The pacing is smooth save for a few scenes during the trial which do not significantly add to the plot. There are very spelling and formatting errors and no grammatical ones.
PREMISE (5)
Based on actual events during the late 1800s and early 1900s. William “Big Bill” Haywood (20s) loses his farm when the federal government revokes the homesteading rights in Nevada and sells the land to corporations. Haywood is forced to move to Idaho with his pregnant wife Jane (20s), to find work as a miner. Years later, Haywood is the local union president and organizes a strike after the company cuts their, already insufficient, pay. It isn't much longer before he is the Treasurer of the Western Federation of Miners, where he causes all manor of problems for the mining companies and the state governments actively oppressing the workers. Meanwhile a man named Harry Orchard (20s), an employee of the WFM, is blowing up mines and scab workers. Harry eventually assassinates the former governor of Idaho with a bomb and is caught the next day in his hotel room with explosives in his possession. An antagonist, James McParland (61) a member of the Pinkerton detective agency, is hired to take care of Haywood and the WFM president Charles Moyer (?). McParland finds a way to get Harry Orchard to, not only, confess to the crimes, but also implicate Haywood and Moyer in the governor's murder. McParland kidnaps both men and brings them to Idaho to face trial, jurisdiction laws prevented prosecution while the men where not in the state. At trial Haywood is represented by his usual lawyer as well as Clarence Darrow (40s), who takes an interest in the case seeing it as a battle, the union versus the mining companies. After testimonies and impassioned speeches from Darrow, the jury eventually decides in favor of Haywood declaring him not guilty. People all over the country celebrate the decision as a victory for the common man.
From beginning to end, it's about the workers being taken advantage of and their inevitable reactions toward the companies and the government who, not only allows, but encourages and assists in the oppression of the workers. Though it holds lofty ideals it stays grounded with strong empathetic characters who have real emotions and real flaws. Though Jane and Haywood have two small girls, Jane suffers from rheumatoid arthritis. She becomes so fragile that she can no longer be intimate. Haywood begins having an affair with Jane's sister, Winnie. Though Haywood is a hero to many, he is not a perfect man. In the final scenes during the trial Clarence Darrow is able to sum up the story in a powerful and moving way.
STRUCTURE (5)
Every aspect of the three act structure is present and easily discernible. Haywood's pre-existing life of a farmer then a miner is detailed and clear. The causes for his actions, which affect the majority events, are all clearly defined. Even though Clarence Darrow is the one arguing in court at the end, fighting the battle, the outcome of the battle affects Haywood more than anyone. Haywood faces his own challenges with his family, his friend and fellow inmate Moyer, and himself.
PACING (4)
Most scenes last only as long as necessary to convey a point. The scenes flow smoothly from one event to the next. The aspects of structure are properly spaced from one another. The conflict is heavy throughout and, for the most part, does not linger in any one subject for too long. The only problems arise during the trial. The scene when Haywood and his lawyer meet Clarence Darrow is unnecessarily long (69.8-73.5). As well as the scene containing the prosecution's opening statement, which is too heavily littered with judicial language and does not add significantly to the plot (83.8-97.2). There is also a short scene in which Darrow attends a baseball game that does not have any significance or affect on the plot (93).
DIALOGUE (5)
The dialogue is accurate for the time and includes many phrases and use of slang (8.5, 14.1). The characters all have distinct speech patterns and some have accents which are clearly written (29.7,12.
. Though some of the scenes at the trial are unnecessarily long the speeches are well written to make a clear point without becoming lectures. Some of the speeches are inspirational and insightful (108.6-111.7).
CHARACTER (4)
Each of the characters is a fully three dimensional human being with clear attributes and flaws. Haywood is a man fighting for his fellow man against the oppression of corporations and the government, but he also cheats on his wife and spends little time with his family. Jane loves her husband but understands that she is of no use to him, she only slows him down, so she does not complain. After the trial ends Jane tells Haywood that she is leaving with the kids and that he is better off without them. Harry Orchard has a penchant for blowing things up but he does have a cause, a distorted excuse he uses to justify his actions because, in his mind, he is the real savior of the working man, not Haywood or Moyer (50). The only problem is that there are so many major characters and important events to convey that each character and their motivations are not explored quite as well as they could be.
CONFLICT (5)
The conflict is based around the struggle of the people against those who would abuse them for personal gain. It is a timeless conflict that is as relevant today as it was a hundred years ago. Haywood's life is not his own. His farm is taken away by corporations and his later prosperity, or lack thereof, is at the mercy of the mining company he works for. So it is with every other miner in the nation, who Haywood fights for, as a union leader. There is also the conflict surrounding his home life, and his subsequent adultery. His attitude costs him a friendship in Moyer (78.7). Every conflict is significant and relate-able.
ORIGINALITY (5)
Though it is based on actual events it does not come off as a history lesson. Each character and event is believable and genuine. The characters are fully developed, emotional human beings. The events are given a clear context with a cause, an action and a reaction. The style does not appear borrowed from any specific source, it is as original as a biopic can be.
WRITING ABILITY (4)
The descriptive prose are short, clear and to the point. There are a few formatting and spelling errors, but there are no grammatical errors. Whenever there are parenthesis in the dialogue indicating an action they did not have their own line as they should (7.5, 8.9, 9.1, 9.4). In one instance I/E is used instead of INT./EXT. (15.5). At two points a money symbol is used in dialogue (90.1, . The character name is missing over the dialogue at page 115.5. The two spelling errors are “prey” at 35.1 and “dranw” at 67.1.
