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This isn't your first screenplay, is it? Or, at the very least, not your first major writing project? Because you seem to be an exceptionally talented writer. The first scene was interesting; I'm curious to know about the golden city which seemed to be protected by some sort of magic. The second...

Reply The characters seem to have clear voices, which is saying a lot. Beth seems loving, yet annoyed at her son's inability to get a job, the son seems apathetic, and these characters are pretty well done. These scenes, though, feel a bit short. I want a bit more from the interaction between...

Good dialogue is a character's expression of an idea or an emotion, with "expression" being the key word. If you focus on how the character is feeling in regards to the situation (or what was just said to them), good dialogue more likely to flow out of you.

My name is Tim. I've been writing for a while, but I've been on a bit of a hiatus until I was hit with an epiphany, and everything changed. See, I've been struggling to get back into writing since Celtx took down their forum (about 2009). Since then, my stubborn little heart just refuses to get...