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It depends on how much screen-time Orwell has, and how central he is to the story. It doesn't sound like it's quite enough to justify including him in your logline, in my opinion. If an Orwell fan comes to watch the film based on your logline, and he pops up only occasionally and briefly...

Yup, I do. I like this version immensely. There's a strong hook already intrinsically embedded, and I wouldn't depend on a logline to convey the gist of your character's arc. Hope you have a scene where he meets up with Hemingway. How cool would that be!

I'd be surprised if there was a standardized formatting rule for the unique situation you're in, so I wouldn't worry about it. Good luck.

Oh, man! Great logline. I'd make an offer on the spot! :D Of course I spent a year researching the Spanish Civil War for my biopic on the Spanish poet, Federico Garcia Lorca. Seriously, though, the second example strikes me as more appropriate. There's too much information in the first...

Is there a hybrid between Afrikaans and English? Like Spanglish? Something that's mostly understandable by an English speaker, but preserves the rhythms, words and cultural connotations of Afrikaans. I'd use some of the grammatical structures of Afrikaans and some of it's words that can be...

Why do you want to include the Afrikaans? Will there be Afrikaans subtitles? Will the actors be speaking in English or Afrikaans?

I agree with IndiePaul. Your on-the-nose dialogue (and stilted sentence structure in general) suggests that you're not a native English speaker. It's hard enough writing good dialogue in your native tongue, let alone trying to do it in a second language. Don't be disheartened. It's possible...

Ha! Haven't seen this thread. Here's an oldie (2010 news story) that I've held onto, thinking I might do a rip-off of Weekend At Bernie's:: "Two women have been arrested at an airport in Liverpool for attempting to smuggle a 91-year-old man onto a plane. A dead 91-year-old man. The female...

That's the spirit. I know you can do better for Giselle! She's a tough, smart cookie and is far too cool to be fantasizing about some dusty old queen. ?

Hey, t2f Yeah, the more I think about it, the less I like those scenes. But there's a world of things you can do with fantasy. Here's an example. The title, DRIFTING HOME, right? What if you open with Giselle on a raft on a wide, calm river, drifting with the current? She's peaceful...

Hi, Time2focus Thanks for the read! I finished it in one sitting, which surprised me. I didn’t think I’d like it since the subject matter is far outside my normal comfort zone as either a writer or reader. But the story held me; it’s honest, full of heart, and told well. The characters are...

I'll look it over. m.charles60 (at) att.net.

One more than just enough.

Great thread! I've written three biopics, two of which made it to this year's Nicholl semifinals. The problem with biopics, as opposed to novel adaptations, is that a person's life almost never follows the beats of classical storytelling. At least with a novel that's worth adapting, one can...

Or, you can just go to dictionary.com and use their thesaurus. :)

No analogy is perfect. The perfect analogy would be the thing itself, and then it wouldn't be an analogy. Anyone can build a house. Not everyone can build a good house. Anyone can tell a story. Not everyone can tell a good story. Time is not unimportant. Yes, there are some things to be...

Let's say you want to build a house, but you know nothing about laying a foundation, framing, drywall, plumbing, electrical wiring, etc. You have two options. You can immerse yourself in learning about those things, and then build your house. Or you can grab the nearest hammer and box of...

I don't know if the other three can be shortened because I'm not privvy to your story. And remember, using strong, fresh verbs can often obviate the need for a bunch of fluffy adverbs and adjectives. "Chris WRENCHES the block in half" creates an image that you just painted without a clutter of...

Almost always, the second version you've posted. And even some of those are overwritten. Example 4 should be "John turns and lifts Chris piggyback." There are 4 main reasons I include detail. (I'm sure there's probably others listed in the main screenwriting canon). All 4 are used carefully...

Yup, it's the usual Catch-22. Many prodcos and studios won't read a script unless it's offered by an agent or manager they trust from past experience. Most good agents won't touch you unless you've got a proven record of produced scripts that have been financially successful. How do you break...